I’ve spent most of this week either shopping or working on edits for my book. I’ve also spent a large chunk of my afternoons helping Caroline do her math homework. And I’m here to tell you I don’t care if I ever see a trapezoid again, much less if I know the perimeter of one.
It doesn’t help that she complains about the homework with each problem. I finally threatened to take fifteen minutes off her bedtime every time she whines about the hardship of division and word problems because I couldn’t take it anymore. And it worked like a charm.
Anyway, I haven’t been shopping for myself. I’m shopping for a friend. And I’m not just saying that to make P feel better. It’s true. I’m spending someone else’s money, but getting all the thrill of the clothing hunt.
But I have been looking for one thing for myself. A pair of gold sandals. Nothing fancy. I’m just after a gold flip-flop type thing in a moderate price range. I am a simple woman with simple desires.
So I went in a store the other day, looked around and then asked if they had any gold sandals. And the lady looked at me and said, “Well, gold sandals didn’t really happen this year.”
What does that even mean?
They didn’t happen? Like they don’t exist? Because Tory Burch, the patron saint of cute sandals, would disagree. She believes in the gold sandal. And I believe in her gold sandals. I just can’t justify buying a pair instead of paying the mortgage.
The whole thing suddenly felt like a challenge. I was determined to find the best pair of gold sandals ever. I was going to make gold sandals happen.
Gulley and I went to lunch yesterday because she couldn’t go on our normal Tuesday and none of this is even relevant to the story but I’m just happy I’m typing words because I spent thirty minutes in front of the mirror plucking my eyebrows trying to think of anything to write about tonight and I will tell you plain and clear that my eyebrows are the worse for it.
And you may think you’re the victim having to suffer through this nonsense, but I will tell you that you have nothing on my left eyebrow.
(Tomorrow morning I’ll regret that I wrote that because P will read the blog while he drinks coffee and will turn and look at me and say something sympathetic and tender like “Dang, you really did screw that eyebrow up.”)
After lunch I made Gulley go with me to DSW in my quest for the elusive gold sandal. Lo and behold, there were about 100 different gold sandals to choose from. It was a plethora of metallic footwear.
So naturally I bought a silver pair of sandals.
What?
I know.
But I really needed a new silver pair because my old silver ones are on their last legs. I guess I mean that literally. And these sandals beckoned to me from the aisle. They were perfect even though they weren’t gold.
Then I remembered that I’d seen gold flip-flops online at Gap. I’d even linked to them on Fashion Friday but hadn’t bought them because I was waiting until they were in the actual store so I could try them on. Gulley and I had just enough time to run in Gap before we had to pick up the kids from school.
Alas, they had the flip-flops in every color but gold. Why is my life so hard?
However, I was able to figure out that I needed a size 9. And so I came home, looked online and discovered that Gap online was offering 25% off plus I had a $10 reward card. So I got those gold flip-flops for the sum of NINE AMERICAN DOLLARS.
For those of you who’ve been reading for a while, that’s $6.00 less than what I normally pay for things.
I made those gold sandals happen. And I made them happen for $9.00.