This is probably going to be brief because I am exhausted. In a few minutes you will understand why.
But first, several people emailed me yesterday and asked about Holly and her decorating services. So I just wanted to let y’all know that she does online consultations. In fact, that’s how we originally started brainstorming about my house. I emailed her four or sixty-two pictures of all my rooms at different angles so she could begin to formulate a plan.
You can also read her version of our day together on her blog if you’re interested.
Or you can go watch Joshua Ledet’s performance last night on American Idol because MY WORD at the talent.
Or you can stay right here and read about how I’ve spent the last few days.
Covered in dust.
What? Covered in dust? Have I undertaken some elaborate home renovation project?
Not really. I’ve just been cleaning out all the stuff that has been under various beds in my house for approximately an embarrassing number of years.
Because after Holly left and I began to think about painting and fresh new stuff, I was seized with the need to get rid of a bunch of old junk. This was actually on my to-do list in August as a goal I’d like to accomplish once Caroline was back in school.
So it makes total sense that we’re down to three weeks left in the school year and I’m finally getting it done.
Procrastination, you complete me.
Anyway, I came home from church on Sunday and was struck with the urge to begin the clean out process. And so I sat and ate some Black Bean and Roasted Garlic Tostitos, hoping this urge would pass. But then I got on the phone with Gulley and we finally committed to schedule the joint garage sale we’ve been threatening to do for the last few months.
(By joint garage sale I mean that we are doing it together. There will be no illegal drugs sold out of Gulley’s garage.)
We set the date for Saturday, May 19th and that was all the motivation I needed to start cleaning. I began with the china cabinet in the dining room. I’m happy to report that it still holds craft supplies, my wedding photo album, our mortgage paperwork and my wedding stationary, but it all looks a lot neater. Plus I managed to throw out an entire trash bag worth of stuff.
I still had some energy after that was completed, so I moved into our bedroom and decided to clean out our nightstands. P’s was easy because all he keeps in it is the latest hard back Cabela’s catalog and a giant blue flashlight.
Mine? A totally different story.
I don’t know how long it had been since I’d cleaned it out from top to bottom, but I will confess that there was a People magazine dated the week Caroline was born. August 2003. Angelina Jolie is on the cover holding baby Maddox and the headline reads “My Baby Saved My Life!”
I guess that explains why she went on to have forty-six more children.
Ironically, there was also a photo of Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston together on the inside which reminded me how much more innocent we all were back in 2003 when we thought the gift of matching, perfectly highlighted hair was enough to keep a marriage together.
Here’s a picture to show you the rest since words fail me.
The place where ponytail holders go to die.
In an odd way, I feel that this random assortment of ponytail holders, bullets, foam rollers, a neon green banana clip, an arrowhead, a Bible, Halls cough drops and Caroline’s little night cap pretty much sums up my life.
Oh, and those bright green little cases? Those hold the wax that I put on my braces every night back in 2006 when I still had braces.
(Have I ever told y’all that my mother-in-law is so organized that she’s been known to bring over a labeled file folder that holds ONE piece of paper? Yet it’s labeled. And in a folder. She could give The Container Store lessons in home organization.)
(This drawer would make her cry.)
I also found a receipt from a lunch I bought in 2006 for a big group of doctors when I was still a pharmaceutical rep. Why was it still in my nightstand in the Year of Our Lord 2012? I don’t know but P is concerned that I was never reimbursed for the lunch expense since I clearly never mailed in the receipt.
And I found a gift certificate to Alamo Cafe that Honey and Big brought me in the hospital the day after Caroline was born. It was hidden under the chart that I made to keep track of Caroline’s eating and pooping. Apparently she had a significant poop on August 8th at 4 p.m. and I decided I didn’t need to keep the chart anymore.
But don’t think I’m not going to go into Alamo Cafe and see if they’ll still honor it. They totally should. I’ve been busy. I had a baby EIGHT AND A HALF years ago.
The last few days I’ve found pictures that have made me smile, dust bunnies that would frighten a grown man, and a sparkly blue flip-flop that’s been missing for two years.
I have thrown out at least six large trash bags full of stuff and have started forming a pile of things to sell in the garage sale in the corner of our bedroom. It looks like the set of Sanford and San. I swear I walked in there yesterday and heard the sounds of a bass harmonica begin to play.
I worked on Caroline’s room last because I knew it would kill my spirit. And it almost won. When the head of a stuffed bunny came off thereby spilling guts all over the place, I nearly walked away. But I persevered.
Every room in my house is totally cleaned out. Purged. Set free.
Except for the kitchen.
But I’ll think about that tomorrow.