Is it just me or does the summer seem to be going by really fast? I mean it’s already the week after the fourth of July which always feels like some sort of halfway mark even though the truth is we don’t go back to school until August 27th and have miles to go before we sleep. Or go back to school. Or whatever.
But I got so distracted last week by all the patriotic festivities that I totally neglected to mention I saw a man at our pool wearing gloves. I have no explanation for this. He wore them in the pool and then took them off when he got out of the pool. I know this because Gulley and I were in the midst of an in depth conversation and were distracted by the loud “CRCKSHSKKKS” sound his gloves made as he ripped off the velcro closures.
(That’s right. They made a CRCKSHKKKS sound. No vowels whatsoever.)
P asked me later if maybe they were some sort of hand flippers but I don’t think so. They were full on gloves. With separate fingers. I’d think if they were flippers then they would have been webbed. But these were like gardening gloves. I bet they leave one heck of a tan line.
(And yes. These are the sort of riveting stories I tell P after he returns from a long day of work. “TODAY AT THE POOL A MAN WAS WEARING GLOVES!”)
(Somehow I doubt this is really key to our marital success.)
(But it may explain why I sometimes feel like he’s tuning me out.)
Anyway, that was on Tuesday afternoon. We hadn’t planned to go to the pool on Tuesday because we wanted the kids to be in full pool mode for the fourth of July, but they assured us they would have fun if we went both days.
But we started our Independence Day by walking in the neighborhood parade. Actually, P and I walked while Caroline rode her electric scooter.
I always love the parade because it just feels like Smalltown, USA. And not just because there was a shark who showed up.
Even though everyone knows a person in a shark costume makes everything better and it’s totally what John Hancock envisioned when he signed the Declaration of Independence.
I also know that several of us dated ourselves by yelling out “LAND SHARK” which is a joke no one gets unless they’re over forty.
And this is my friend’s little boy who wasn’t really all that enthusiastic about being part of the parade even though he was being pulled in a cushy wagon with a pillow while the rest of us (me) complained that our flip-flops were giving us blisters.
We felt like maybe he was having a hard time finding joy because the U.S. economy is in the toilet and we’re in debt up to our eyeballs to China.
And then P upped the festivity quotient by putting two flag pinwheels in his hat.
(I have no idea why I’m standing like a duck. Don’t be afraid to bend your knees, Susie.)
After the parade we came home to rest for a few hours before we met friends at the pool. Caroline had really hoped to defend her watermelon seed spitting title and her belly flop championship but it didn’t work out. I think her spitting form was off since because front teeth came in since last summer and all hillbillies know that nothing throws off your spitting like a full set of teeth.
As for the belly flop, she led with her head. It was very graceful but lacked the whole necessary component of sounding like a turkey hitting the cement after being dropped from a helicopter.
But after she got over her defeat we all had a good time. There was even a DJ at the pool. The official pool email announced there would be “A DJ SPINNING RECORDS FROM 3-6 P.M.” The only problem with that is no one has invented a time machine that allows you to travel back to 1983. So instead there was a man selecting playlists on his computer that was hooked up to some large speakers.
But he still played “Wake Me Up Before You Go Go” so all was forgiven.
Later on that night we cooked hot dogs at our house and the kids ran around with sparklers while occasionally yelling “OWWWW” because one of them would get hit with a random spark.
(I attempted to take pictures of this portion of the evening but my limited photography skills just produced a few hazy photos with random streaks of light.)
And then on Thursday we spent the day recovering. Honestly, I can’t even remember what we did. It’s all a blur but I think it involved a nap and feeling disoriented that it was Thursday and not Monday.
So that’s what we’ve been doing around here. Along with feeling like summer is half over when we’re actually only about a third of the way through.
At least I think that’s right. I don’t really like to do math in the summer.
Or wear gloves at the pool.