Normally this is where I’d write a few paragraphs about what we did this weekend. However, I can sum it up in a sentence.
We watched the Olympics.
Thank you and good night.
Just kidding. When have I ever been that succinct?
But since I’m guessing none of you really care to hear about how I finally resorted to taking a Zyrtec on Thursday night and thus spent Friday in a near comatose state, I thought it might be fun (for me at least) to recap my favorite Olympic moments so far.
(On a kind of related note (but not really) it’s ironic to me that I spent years selling Zyrtec to doctors and claiming that it doesn’t cause sedation when it flat knocks me out for days. But I’m one of those people who will always deal with possible side effects no matter how small the actual percentage. I believe this is largely due to the fact that I always read the complete list of side effects and then my brain calls them into being.)
Anyway, here are my top ten Olympic moments so far:
1. Queen Elizabeth parachuting out of the helicopter with James Bond.
2. Meredith Viera and Matt Lauer continually pronouncing that the Queen was having a great time and had a wicked sense of humor while she remained stone-faced throughout the entire proceedings.
3. The part of the opening ceremonies where they re-enacted the Industrial Revolution.
(Not really because SNOOZE.)
4. Paul McCartney looking for all the world like the Dowager Countess of Grantham as he sang “Hey Jude”.
5. Ryan Lochte winning the 400 IM. It was a great moment and I wish NBC would quit focusing on what Phelps doesn’t do and what others have achieved.
Get a new story, NBC.
6. Watching Ryan Secrest’s hair get progressively higher with each interview. Maybe London weather is conducive to good hair?
It would certainly explain my girl Kate Middleton.
7. Gabby Douglas. I could put her in my pocket.
Seriously. I think she’d fit in my pocket.
But she is darling. And love that she said she meditates on scripture before she competes.
8. Any time they interview Bela Karolyi. I’m not kidding.
I don’t understand half of what he says and he frightens me, but he makes me want to be a better gymnast.
Which is impressive considering I can’t even do a cartwheel and my abs are possibly made of Pinot Grigio.
9. Staying up late with Caroline and listening to all her reactions on everything. Her little heart was broken for Jordan Wieber last night. And NBC didn’t help matters by interviewing Aly while Jordan cried in the background. Have some decency, people.
Caroline asked me to compose an angry tweet to express that the Olympics were dead to her at that moment. Mama’s little baby has embraced the power of social media.
They grow up so fast.
10. Lastly, I realize there were many athletes who accomplished amazing things, but this moment was really the highlight for me.
And made me glad that no one has ever videotaped my reactions during one of Caroline’s soccer games because crazy recognizes crazy.
What about y’all? Any favorite moments?
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7 + 8 = yes, just YES. I wish they would offer subtitles for Bela because I know he knows his shit, but I don’t understand a word he says!
The opening ceremonies didn’t really do anything for me. I think I missed the point?
I laughed out loud at the abs made of Pinot grigio. Perhaps that is where mine went as well.
The dad in that video cracked me up too. So crass of me, but it looks like he REALLY has to go to the bathroom and is just trying to make it home.
Oh I loved #4!!! I laughed outloud and almost spilled my morning coffee.
Living over here in Switzerland is a sweet life – BUT – I don’t have any American television and last night I said to my husband “I miss NBC so bad”. No back stories, no human drama, just actual sport coverage in German. Which is fine, but I miss the stories.
LOVE the video you posted. Sadly I don’t even know who Jordan, Gabby or Aly are. I need to sit closer to the television so I can see their names, since all the commentary is greek to me. Ooops German.
My family lives in Ecuador and we’ve been enjoying the Olympics in English via a great website that’s free! ustvnow.com Try it out. It requires an email to set up an account but that’s it!
I’d be willing to bet that nbcolympics.com has all their backstory videos online. I think you can also live-stream many of the events. And, since you’re only an hour ahead, you’d actually be awake for the events!
Yes, I will try to make better use of my internet — mostly I’m on here being entertained by blogs such as Big Mama
Thanks for the tips – am going to check out the us television site right now !
I feel guilty even say it but “the Opening Ceremonies was a disappointment ”
I was sooooo excited to watch….set the DVR so I could rematch the highlights
and other then the lifting of the brass/copper pots to form the cauldron …….the fireworks
And poor Mahaned Allie……it was so disjointed (kind of like this post)……when they left the theme of the history of that part of the world and went to the music of the 60′. 70′s and 80′s
I thought what the heck this has turned into a musical review…..
I loved the opening in China…….keeping in mind those poor folks were forced to practice
16 hours a day for months and months and months…….but it was spectacular !!!!!
And Utah. WOW …….that was beautiful…….a story you could follow and appreciate.
Can’t wait to. See the closing …….
The opening ceremony…serious snorefest. I thought the Industrial Revolution was bad but the whole girl-meets-boy thing was annoying (fun music, though). I too couldn’t believe how tacky NBC was in stalking Jordyn Weiber in the background of the gymnast interviews. I laughed at your mention of the Bela interviews – when he gets excited he might as well be speaking another language! Would love some more Olympic comments from you!
Jordyn Wieber is from my town- and her mom works out at the gym that I work out at. So that makes me sort of like an honorary judge or something. I was so proud of her for staying classy- when they interviewed her and she just wanted to go sob somewhere in private. ANNOYING to me how they wouldn’t let the poor girl have her moment of peace. She is GOLD in my book. LOVED watching the parents of the girl doing the un-even bars, moving their body to every move she made….SO FUNNY. Oh my gosh, I could just feel their stress.
The Olympics ROCK……such inspiration. Hope Jordyn has peace and comfort today.
Kelly
I had a friend over last night as we were watching the parents’ reaction. I made her solemnly swear that if my little people ever compete on that level she will be a human screen for me from all television cameras. I’m loving every moment of these Olympics, too!
Told the Hubs-our kids can never be in the Olympics because I would SOO be that mom!
And poor Jordan, just wanted to hug her and get her to her momma!
We were laughing so hard that we were crying at Aly’s parents last night! Priceless reactions!!
I cheated and looked at the results before we watched. The rule that only two members of the same team can qualify is so unfair. The top 24 gymnasts in the world get to compete, but not Jordyn because two of her team members did a tiny bit better?! Lame. Poor girl. I can’t believe they had her in the screen while they interviewed Aly. Very sad.
Thanks for the laughs again! I hope they keep the cameras on those two the rest of the competition!
Loved watching Aly’s parents watch her – especially her dad. Priceless!! And can I just say I love the P&G commercials – they are stellar! And poor Jordan, but way to go Aly! She was so excited. LOVE THE OLYMPICS!!! And love that my girls turned my living room into an Olympic gym and are now going to be famous gymnasts.
Loved the line about pinot grigio abs! I am embarrassed to admit that I have not watched any of the Olympics. :s I did catch some archers getting a silver the other day because T had it on. If I could figure out when the gymnastics are going to be on, I might watch that with the girls, but then I’d get sucked in and wouldn’t leave the TV for the next week. I know myself too well.
Totally LOL’s when I saw your tweet this morning about C’s reaction to Jordyn being out. Tell her I agree!! I was dead tired so missed that part of it but I am extremely sad for that poor girl. She and Gabby are my absolute favorites and I so wanted them to compete together. And exactly when did that stupid rule about two going on to compete come into effect? Maybe I slept through the entire last summer Olympics?
And the opening ceremonies were TERRIBLE. I can’t believe I wasted my time watching them.
I think it’s too bad Saturday Night Live is on a break because Kristin Wiig and Bill Hader could have had some fun doing those parents.
This is a great post. I shared it on facebook.
We LOVE the Olympics around here and try to watch as much as we can!
I too had trouble getting into the opening ceremonies. I do not like the queen, I think she’s prissy and spoiled and her permanent stoic face just drives me up the wall. I also thought the opening ceremonies were too music orientated. I just didn’t get it. And I heard Paul McCartney sing for the Queen’s 60th jubilee a few weeks ago and he’s just plain awful. He’s 70 years old and has lost his voice. He may be Sir Paul but his time is so over.
Now on the bright side. Jordan will compete with the team and also on individual apps. It’s not like she is out. But they change the rules all the time and keeping up is confusing. In my understanding the all-around is all the apparatus and one is crowned. Even though she didn’t qualify for that one she will be seen many times yet. Tell Caroline not to lose the faith. And Gabby! OMgosh she is adorable. I fell in love with all the little pocket girls when they were qualifying.
Now if only we get to see some trampoline and some rythmic gymnastics I will be a happy girl. And yes, I agree on the stories about Phelps. His time has come and gone and it’s time to move on from him. I’m not sure why he didn’t want to go out on a high note with his last Olympics and then just get a job or something. And a real life.
I loved the skeet shooting girl – 99 out of 100. What a great sport that is. I could even do that one!! lol
Hugs from Minnesota
Marie
your posts always make me laugh, but this one takes the cake! i cannot get enough of the olympics myself. The husband and I were crying laughing at the gymnast parents! I cannot imagine the pressure they are under watching their little girls! and caroline was def not alone in here disgust for nbc and for the olympics for getting the sobbing jordan weiber out of the back shot of the interview! she was so well spoken and composed when she was interviewed though! I just know she will pull it together for the upcoming competitions! cant wait to watch and to read your posts afterwards!!
I’m the only one on the planet who hasn’t been watching it. Thanks for the recap!
Laughed so hard when I saw those parents watching their daughter compete. Many years ago, when my sweet husband played in tennis tournaments, I’d end up in the parking lot peering over the bushes to catch the last few points of the match. Yes…crazy recognizes crazy.
Funny stuff!!
I LOVE that video. Notice how they were kinda doing the routine in their seats. It’s like hitting the imaginary brake peddle when you are teaching your kid to drive. I would guess that I look pretty similar. I swear that my legs actually run in place when my kids are chasing a ball, going for a catch, or running to a base. And I’m pretty sure that I have the very same pained expressions. There is no other way to explain it…PAIN. That’s something that they forget to tell you about being a parent.
It’s too bad SNL is on hiatus for the summer because they would totally spoof that video! Hysterical!
Love your updates…Been moving this weekend (seriously?-just rip my fingernails out with pliers.right.now.) and have no TV or internet. I didn’t plan well did I? Not sure hubby would have agreed to do the big relocation planned around my NBC scheduled programming. We even have someone we know competing…ugh! I was tearing up everytime I saw the Proctor and Gamble “Thanks Mom” commercial. Every.time. Thanks for keeping me posted. Hope C recovers from her disappointment over the gymnastics and is equally excited when women’s soccer comes on. I predict a sports bra in her very near future. Please demonstrate proper technique for ripping off shirt and throwing arms above head in celebration…and have P videotape!
Bless those parents. My daughter was an equestrian. I posted every trot, grabbed mane & sailed over every jump, and bounced and hurt with every fall. It was more painful than childbirth, but I wouldn’t trade a minute of it!
Love this post!!
Best part of the Opening Ceremonies was right at the beginning; the four children’s choirs singing the four country’s unofficial national anthems. The group inside the stadium and the group in Wales both sang hymns! And they sang them so well. Loved that.
Yes, Melanie, you are so right that NBC needs to focus more on what others achieve and not on what Phelps doesn’t do. I think Phelps has lost the fire he had and is under trained for this event.
And just FYI, y’all, Ryan Lochte is a GATOR!
And whoever made the rule that only two gymnasts from each country can compete in the all around should be tossed in the Olympic cauldron. Take the top scoring gymnasts regardless of country. Back when the Soviet Union/Romania were dominant I don’t think it was restricted like now. Hmm.
I said the same kind of thing about Bela Karolyi! I don’t understand what he’s saying, but I’m sure that I agree with him!
Your whole list was dead on, particularly Sir Paul as the Dowager Countess and Aly’s parents. I love that video!
Thank you SO much for sharing this video!!! I was desparately trying to keep one eye on it while my dear husband was subjecting me to watching a video over the mechanism of action of a new product he will be selling. You can feel my pain, I am sure. Try Allegra
Loved the list and totally agree with number 10! I laughed the whole time they played that on NBC only because I know I would be the exact way if my child were competing!
By the way – this is my first comment on your blog, but I have been reading for a while. I love it!
I could have written this. Seriously. Every word. Especially about Lochte and Phelps. I was SO MAD that NBC was even talking about Phelps after Lochte’s win.
My husband and I were both laugh/crying watching those parents. Bless!!
watched knowing that little girl would come in third. sorta like looking at a wreck just because you can’t look away. I agree with Caroline about how tacky NBC has been with the interviews. I also laughed watching the parents. I’m sure they will love seeing themselves because someone who loves them recorded it just for them! If you find a copy of the 007 part, you will see the queen with a little smile. The best part of the whole thing.
11. The Visa Nadia Comaneci commercial. Can’t love Bela without loving Nadia!
You are quite possibly the funniest writer ever! If only you would write text books or training materials. Wouldn’t that be fabulous (for us anyway) ?!?! I will now make reading your blog a Monday morning ritual as I actually smiled (& giggled) many many times. Thanks Big Mama!
Crazy recognizes crazy! Solid Gold!
My heart broke for Jordan and she did keep it classy. I think I would have been aggressively rolling my eyes and making other crude gestures in the background while they interviewed Aly.
And what is up with Ryan Lochte’s “grill”? Is it a necessary piece of dental equipment/prosthesis or a fashion statement or ??? I don’t know but it hurts to look at.
Keep up the stellar commentary, sister.
Bela–hysterical. The Olympics are complete now that he has yelled at Bob Costas.(BTW has Bob found Botox?)
Gabby–love her..she trains in West Des Moines IA where I live and she is darling!
Jordyn. So sorry for her.
The parents video. Best yet.
Michael Phelps. Love his mom.
Would it kill the Queen to crack a smile every now and then?? I just don’t get it….and with all the stuff she has you would think she would be happier
The only part my son liked about the opening ceremonies was the part with that Mr. Bean guy. He was howling with laughter at him!
I love those sweet gymnasts but am I the only one who feels a bit sorry for them? I just want to say “don’t worry honey, just eat some cookies and take the day off.” They just seem under SO much stress at such a young age. I would NEVER in a million years want my daughter to trade her childhood for that.
The parent’s clip is too funny. I saw it last night on television and got stressed just watching them. I can’t imagine what it must be like watching your daughter compete in the Olympics. More than likely I will never have to experience that.
Agree with all your points. I think NBC needs to give it up…actually I think they already have. Instead of trying to work with people knowing what is going to happen already, they just gave up and give us little snippets of this that and everything. Sooooo annoying! Can we at least watch one sport at a time? All the fake drama is driving me crazy. Of course the real drama they created by making poor Jordan stand there while they do interviews is just classless!
I despise NBC (and CBS & ABC, for that matter). The only thing I watch on NBC is Jeopardy. Honest!!! I watch nothing on ABC and only Big Band Theory on CBS. (Yes, I believe in the big bang theory…God said it and BANG, it happened!!!) Oh, did I mention CNN? Oh, I agree, not worth mentioning….
I’m probably the only person alive who appreciated the 20 minute Industrial Revolution reenactment. But that’s because we homeschool and KID YOU NOT, we studied the Industrial Revolution last week. It was like David-what’s-his-name had been in my house all week and knew what my kids needed reinforced. Only not, because A – he didn’t care about me and B – he followed that up with dancing nurses and a creepy baby, things my kids do NOT need reinforced in their nightmares.
I sat and CACKLED over those poor parents watching their daughter. I totally get it. If my kids ever compete in anything, I will be the one under the table, clutching a bottle of wine.
Would it be horrible of me to say that video clip could be an SNL skit?
Love that clip of Aly’s parents! (She’s from my state!) Another parent clip I love is one that shows the mom covering her eyes and the dad LOOKING THROUGH BINOCULARS. Cracked me up.
LOL about the Paul McCartney comment. I thought he looked like Maggie Smith, too!
(Btw, Zyrtec knocks me out as well. Ugh.)
Booooo! I missed the video and now it’s blocked.
I just love that Bela inspires you to be better at gymnastics. That still has me giggling. I know I haven’t been commenting as much lately–but you still. make. me. laugh. Ever. Day.
And I’m still praying for your book-writing, which may even be done by now. I haven’t noticed you mention it lately??
All right. Continue on, funny lady.
First, I can’t watch the video because it says it has been blocked by the International Olympic Committee on copyright grounds. Yikes. That sounds so official and scary.
Second, poor Jordyn Wieber. I was so sad for her. I cannot believe that they wouldn’t let her walk off and cry in peace. I failed the vision test at the DMV when I was 15, and I could not get out fast enough. I wanted my Mama and a private place to cry. Clearly, the Olympics are a way bigger deal. Let that girl cry alone!
And last, the Queen was soooo stone-faced. It bothered me. When she announced the opening of the Games it was so monotone and blah. I tell my kids that I’m going out to get the mail with more enthusiasm.
All that said, I am still watching every day. I can’t stop.
I love the reactions of the parents too. You know they have been through so much – so many highs and lows and it is so great to see their dreams for their child come true. When my daughter did well at her state diving meet, I cried too
The 4×100. That was INTENSE. Oh, and the whole Jordyn Wieber/Aly Raismann thing kills me… I hate that they had to compete with one another like that. I’m with Bela. It’s ridiculous. The synchronized diving gets me every time, too. I could go on and on… I am an Olympics junkie and have watched at least as much via Internet streaming on the iPad as I have on the actual TV. It’s entirely probable that I’ve had both going at once on multiple occasions.
The olympic committee has blocked the video, oh yes they have. Dang.
I loved Aly’s parents. The video was blocked here, but I was able to find it here: http://network.yardbarker.com/all_sports/article_external/usa_gymnast_aly_raismans_parents_reaction_video/11328676 if anyone is still interested. Can’t believe the Olympics is being so heavy-handed with the copyright infringement.
Girl! Ditto on #5 and #10! Loved, loved, loved the parents’ coverage during the routine. My favorite moment from Sunday’s coverage. And #5 caused me to adopt the policy of changing the channel during post-race interviews. Enough already of making it about comparison, instead of the savoring the moment of knowing you put forth your best effort.
Bob Costas could probably fit in your pocket too.
Also, please consider doing an investigative piece on what the heck is in the Queen’s purse and why in the world is she always clutching it?
I LOVED this post! I laughed my way through it. The video you posted won’t play. Apparently the material is copyrighted by the IOC or something. But, I saw it last night… I know how stressed I am watching them compete, so I can’t imagine being their parents!!! I sit on the couch leaning and twitching through gymnastic routines and kicking my feet through swimming races. I’d probably have a heart attack if I were a sports-mama.
The weather in the UK might really be conducive to great hair. My curls were always best on a rainy, Washington day. I’ve only had a handful of good hair days since moving to TX a year ago… any most were on weird unTexan drizzly days.
Weren’t those parents adorable?? And I totally agree with Caroline. That was rotten to put the crying Jordyn in the back of Aly’s winner interview.
The parent video has been blocked by the IOC. Boo. =(
Loved the post! I haven’t missed much of the games since I’m still on summer break.
One question: How do they tread water for that long in water polo?? Amazing
OMG, That is our insurance guy in that video!!!! Too funny! I have to tell my husband! I didn’t know his child was Ally Raisman!
Jeez Louise. Please. The opening ceremony was AWFUL. Embarrassing. Left me scratching my head. The Chinese got it right. Let’s ask them to do all the opening shows. OK? Re the Zyrtec. It makes me sleepy, too. I use the generic Claritin which I buy at Amazon for like 4 cents a pill. It did make me sleepy for the first week or so but that passes. And so worth taking. Just start it on a week where it’s fine to stumble around, take naps and let some one else do the driving. Yes, that’s a joke. Take it at night and you’ll sleep like the proverbial baby.
Zyrtec, even when taken as night as recommended, still makes me a zombie the next day. Claritin is perfect for me.
Opening ceremonies – really? What could be more exciting than a tribute to the National Health Service?
Ryan’s hair has to be inspired by the trend-setting “one F” Jef from The Bachelorette.
Oh man you have made me laugh out loud with this post and then the two after about the Olympics! You have hit every nail on the , several of your points we have talked about in our household as the exact same discussion. The best was how you described Bela. I couldn’t have stated it better. My 8-year old daughter too has decided she will be an Olympic gymnast as well although she has only taken a six week session at the YMCA like four years ago. The soccer, swimming, or tennis she is currently participating in don’t seem to hold the esteem that gymnastics does. Although she was a little horrified that Gabby left home to train for the Olympics. She is not grasping that concept.