So the real world wasn’t so bad yesterday.
I mean, sure, I had to get up while it was still dark outside and pack a lunch and find a backpack that I threw in the laundry room on December 22, but other than that it was fine. Although we did have a moment when Caroline put on her hot pink skinny jeans and I realized she grew about two inches over the Christmas break.
They gave new meaning to the term “high waters”.
I asked her if she wanted to change but she said “NO WAY. I want everyone to see how much I grew over Christmas.” Sadly, I don’t feel the same way about my Christmas growth.
Anyway, we remedied the situation with a pair of boots that covered the too short jeans because fashion faux pas are the mother of invention.
She went off to school and I enjoyed the complete silence of the house for about twenty minutes before I headed up to Starbucks to try and get some writing done. I hadn’t seen my Starbucks buddy for weeks and he immediately remembered he owed me a cup of coffee since Johnny Manziel won the Heisman. We discussed our Christmases and he informed me that Johnny Manziel will probably never get a speeding ticket in Texas. Which is an incredibly random thought and that’s saying something coming from me.
We also discussed Jenna Bush Hager’s pregnancy. Although we hadn’t officially bet on it happening, it had been a topic of discussion.
And then I left Starbucks to go get my eyebrows done. I have to tell you that the eyebrow gel is actually unbelievably effective. I mean, effective to the point that I might need to quit using it so often for fear of looking like the late Larry Hagman.
After that, I went to HEB to buy some groceries and now you just fell asleep because who cares?
I also feel that I should mention I resisted the urge all day long to ask people, “Did you do something jolly with your hair?” If you watched Downton Abbey this makes complete sense. If not, you have no idea what I’m talking about and that makes me sad.
And then we watched the National Championship Game. I’m using the word “game” loosely because it was beyond ugly. Good night. The college playoff system can’t get here fast enough. And the worst part of the game being boring was listening to Musberger talk about how attractive A.J. McCarron’s girlfriend is and no one wants to hear that. Simmer down, grandpa.
So the bad news is I haven’t watched The Bachelor yet. But it’s good to have goals and that gives me something to shoot for later today.
And that’s really all I have to say today. I realize it’s very boring and I apologize for that.
But, I say, did you do something jolly with your hair?