Listen.
Y’all are a veritable wealth of information. Gulley and I were talking yesterday and said we can’t wait to go to Trader Joe’s with a list of all the things we need to try. I’m especially excited about anything that translates to easy dinner because who doesn’t want that?
I’m sitting here watching The Bachelor while I’m typing this because I believe in the importance of quality television. And I just have to comment on a couple of things:
1. Do those girls realize when Sean picks someone up in a helicopter for a date that it’s not actually his helicopter? Because they react like OH MY WORD HE HAS HIS OWN HELICOPTER! HE’S LIKE BATMAN!
Except he’s not. It’s not his helicopter.
2. Most of these girls seem to have attended some sort of special enunciation class conducted by the cast of The Hills where they learn to talk through their nose and add extra syllables to words.
“I mean, I really like Sean, like REAL-LEE like him, but you know I’m here for HIM and, UM, not to make friends with the other GIRL-ELS”.
Maybe this is an indication that I’m getting old. Or maybe I should put down the remote and read a book.
Why can’t I quit you, Bachelor?
3. What the heck, Chris Harrison, with the addition of the practical joke date? It’s like he’s just allowed the whole show to jump the shark for his own amusement.
You can’t possibly know this about me but practical jokes make me so uncomfortable. Especially when the people involved don’t even know each other and are on national television.
In non-Bachelor related news, (SPOILER ALERT) how about poor Edith on Downton Abbey? What about her jolly hair? Did he forget how jolly her hair can be? I don’t understand how he could wait until the last minute to do that.
(Do you see how I’m trying to be vague in case someone ignores my spoiler alert? Did what? I DON’T KNOW YOU’LL HAVE TO WATCH THE SHOW.)
And, finally, on a non-T.V. note (YES. I have something to say besides T.V and it’s very important. Just wait.)
I did something weird to the pointer finger on my left hand.
(Speaking of jumping the shark, I think my blog just did.)
I know you won’t sleep until you know the story so I will share it with you. And, good news, you may sleep like a baby at some point while I share.
Last Thursday I put on my Uggs. I believe I mentioned last week that I spent an entire day running errands in my Uggs and yoga pants because I’m trying to singlehandedly bring sexy back. But I neglected to mention that when I first slipped on my Uggs that morning, there was something pointy in the toe.
So I pulled off my boot and reached in to pull out the offending item. And I never saw what it was, but it really hurt my finger when I grabbed it as pointy things often do. Which is why you shouldn’t grab them willy-nilly out of the toe of your boot.
I couldn’t see any visible mark and even though it felt like a splinter or something, there wasn’t anything there that I could see. But then it woke me up in the middle of the night with that feeling that my fingertip had a heartbeat. Like on Elf.
(I wasn’t wearing a green elf suit though. I just want to clarify.)
The next morning I woke up and it seemed to hurt a lot less and so I decided it was just one those bruise things you get like if you ever prick your finger on a rose thorn like Princess Aurora did except I guess that was a spinning wheel and not a rose.
(Personally, I find Princess Aurora to be the least compelling of all the Disney princesses. She just doesn’t seem very warm. Granted, she spends most of the movie sleeping, but I think Snow White is much more likable. And she adapted to living with those dwarfs so you have to believe she wasn’t very high-maintenance.)
The point is now it’s practically Tuesday and my finger doesn’t seem any better. It still feels like maybe something is in there, but I can’t see anything. And, frankly, I’m at a loss as to what the next step should be in my finger rehabilitation.
Thank you for your concern.
I know this kind of riveting material is what keeps you coming back to read every day. I just hope my finger makes a full recovery so I can keep typing.