So here’s some news.
We have a new goldfish named Dory.
Perhaps you’re thinking that you don’t recall me mentioning that we were in the market for a new fish. Or maybe you’re not thinking anything at all because you couldn’t care less whether or not we have a new pet at our house.
But, either way, I’m going to explain.
Last Friday was the school carnival at Caroline’s school. This is an event that in the past has brought us two “free” hermit crabs and three goldfish. Then last year I wised up and made a “no new pets” rule before the carnival and told Caroline she was welcome to use her tickets on all manner of silly string and face paint and snow cones, but not for any game where the “prize” included a live animal.
And it worked like a charm.
So on Friday morning before I sent her off to school I reminded her that carnival fun could include basically any activity except acquiring a new fish or crab. But then we arrived at the carnival later that afternoon and I was caught up in conversation with some other mothers and, long story short, she caught me when my defenses were down and I basically said, “You can do whatever you want, but I am neither holding a fish for the remainder of this carnival or feeding it once we get it home”.
Five minutes and two spins of the wheel later, Dory was a part of our family.
I am so weak.
However, when she marched up to me – fish in hand – I reminded her that I wasn’t going to stand around and hold a fish for the next two hours. She kind of huffed at me in an exasperated way, but ran off with her fish in a plastic bag and I figured Dory wasn’t long for the world because it was about 90 degrees and you have to think being jostled around in a plastic bag sealed with a flimsy rubber band isn’t conducive to life. As evidenced by the mass grave of goldfish that you can always find on the side street of the school later in the evening.
Seriously, where is PETA in the school carnival game? How many goldfish and hermit crabs needlessly die each year in the name of raising money for the PTO? Can we not find some other prize options? Options that don’t involve parents having to go to the local pet store to stock up on fish food or freeze dried shrimp for hermit crabs?
(I admit that I still harbor some wounds and bitterness over being pressured into buying a fancy “Crabitat” for the hermit crabs she won a few years back. I realize I had other options but I felt that the crabs needed room to roam free. And clearly I was right because some of you who have been reading for a while may remember that they eventually ran away from home.)
The carnival ended a couple of hours later and I walked with her to retrieve Dory from where she’d left him/her under a table. She seemed pleased that Dory still appeared to be so vibrant and I did my best to avoid making eye contact with the fish because I realize it’s just a fish but I have this way of becoming emotionally attached and unable to just let something die. For instance, a friend sent me some beautiful flowers last week and it took me two days to throw them out after they were obviously dead because I felt bad for them. This is the emotional make up I’m dealing with here.
And so I spent the weekend not checking on Dory or asking if she’s fed Dory or wondering about Dory’s general well-being and whether or not she’s happy in the little bowl where so many fish before her have lost their lives. I will not give in. Because eventually the honeymoon period will be over and Caroline will quit caring about Dory and then the sole burden will fall to me unless I stand strong and repeat the mantra “it’s just a fish”.
Which is exactly what I intend to do.