Last Thursday, P headed down to South Texas with a group of men from our church to help rebuild a church that was damaged by Tropical Storm Dolly.
Or was it Hurricane Dolly?
I can’t remember. Poor Dolly was the second runner-up in the Hurricane race this year and no one ever remembers the second runner-up.
If you don’t believe me, ask anyone who has ever been one.
When P called home on Friday night, he mentioned that they had attended a dinner for the National Rifle Association.
Church group, mission trip, NRA.
It’s like a bad right-wing cliche’.
Anyway, I helped host a baby shower on Saturday night so I was literally walking out the door to go to the shower as P was coming in from his trip. He said he was exhausted and would probably be in bed by the time I got home.
I arrived home a little after 9:00, set my purse down on the kitchen island, looked up and saw this hanging on the wall.
Where am I? What is happening? Did the ghost of Charlton Heston come to call?
Apparently, P failed to mention that he was a big winner at the NRA banquet.
And considering the prize, I am playing fast and loose with the word “winner”.
I walked into the bedroom and he was still awake.
“What is that thing hanging on our wall?”
“I won it!”
“I’m not sure ‘win’ is the word I’d use.”
“I thought I’d hang it in the kitchen.”
“Why do you hate our kitchen?”
We went to bed with the “art” still hanging on the kitchen wall because we’ve been married for eleven years and, clearly, P knew it would be relegated to the backhouse within 24 hours. He even bet our associate pastor that it would take me less than three seconds to notice that he’d hung it on the wall.
He underestimated me by a half second.
Yesterday morning, Caroline woke up and came into the kitchen. She immediately noticed the new picture and started to cry, which gives me great hope for her future in art appreciation.
But the main reason she was upset is because this is what normally hangs in that spot.
So as she began to cry she said, “But where is the beautiful picture of me?”
The good news is she appears to have both liberty and security.
The NRA would be so proud.
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YESSSSS!!! (picture me doing a fist pump)I was the first to leave a comment twice now!!
This post is hilarious…my husband would have came home with a big fat smile on his face if he would have “won” that as well. I always hang stuff ‘like that’ in our grill house or…..garage!hahahaaha!
Too funny about Caroline missing her beautiful picture!
“I am playing fast and loose with the word winner”… hilarious:-)
Bless her beautiful little heart “where the beautiful picture of me?” I love it! His “gift”…well I haven’t had enough coffee yet to even attempt to be witty, but I can say I would put the beautiful picture of little one back up!
My sweet husband did something like that and the picture now hangs beautifully in his closet. It takes a special picture to hang in the…well…closet! It greats him every morning and makes him smile. I wonder if his deer head will fit in there too?
My friend’s husband mounted a boar’s head in their home office. It did not end well.
Poor Caroline!!!! She probably thought her mom and dad were sending her an indirect message!
Oh my goodness. I just love that girl.
I love the hanging.
It is perfect.
That’s hilarious, the old man’s major award, that is. It appears to be FRAG-EE-LAY.
LOL that is so funny! Poor Caroline I would have cried too if my pic had been replaced with that sign
Your hubby is too funny
Have a great day
Kim
I’ve found that my husband’s office AT WORK is a great place for all of his pictures. AT WORK is a long way away from my kitchen.
Maybe you should have made your own sign that said:
“Those that trade tasteful for tacky sleep alone.”
(Your stories bring me joy every day…..)
Okay I feel like you owe me six days of my life back, I have fallen in love with all of those dogs, horses, kids and wranglers on Ms. Ree’s blog aka http://www.thepioneerwoman.com. Thanks for linking it, I sure have been trading some of those big ranch size kisses with my man thanks to her story. Oh, I think the sign is great…but not hanging there.
She is too sweet and that picture is adorable! I go with Caroline on this one!
“I won it!” Too funny. Poor husbands. That sign would have ended up in our basement bar area.
Caroline cracks me up. Kids are so selfish, aren’t they?
We call the “backhouse” the “man-shed” and that’s exactly where I would send it to but I think it’s funny that he planned it and even had a discussion about how long it would take for you to see it. I bet they laughed their heads off!!
Oh my word, that is hysterical. Was he seriously excited about it, or did he hang it as a joke?
One year for Christmas–for REAL–my dad gave my mom a three-feet-tall wooden cow *shudder* for her kitchen. The cow *shudder* held a sign that said, “Kitchen closed, this heifer is GONE.” And you can be sure that every single Christmas, I give him a hard time about that.
Ha, Ha! This looks like something my dad would hang up!
My husband has both the liberty AND the security to hang whatever he likes WHEREever he likes – as long as it’s in the garage.
… and I’ll bet as soon as Daddy saw his little girl shedding a tear, the picture went RIGHT BACK ON THAT WALL.
(at least that’s how it works in our house… our daughters have their Daddy wrapped tightly around their respective little fingers! ha ha)
That picture of Caroline is beautiful. I would’ve cried too!
Clinging to guns, religion and good decorating taste at the house of Big Mama. ;>)
How precious, she missed her picture. Aww!
My husbands “stuff” gets hung up or stored in HIS office. Which happens to be the walk in closet in the spare room. ha ha ha Poor hubby.
HILARIOUS-ALL of it!
“Church group, mission trip, NRA. It’s like a bad right-wing cliche’.”
LOL
I think that is exactly where the ‘bitter-clinger’ comment came from. I’m thinking of making t-shirts.
I’d hang the picture on the porch.
Great post.
Hi webmaster!
He took your baby down to hang that thing!!!! I am surprised he is still breathing on his own! Picture isn’t that bad but does not hold a candle to the sweet baby girl. Great post.
Does he drive a truck? He could always hang it there!
Church group, missions trip and NRA dinner…only in Texas!
Take care,
Julie
What’s the little white square below the picture? Auto eject?
That is such a cute picture!
Also, I hate to admit that I love the one your husband got. Look at it this way, it could have been worse:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/mollyeh11/119846362/
My husband really wants one of those signs.
I wish we had room for a backhouse in our backyard!
I bet those things come in quite handy.
So, instead, we use our garage.
Or I send it to work with him for his office wall.
(beautiful portrait of Caroline by the way!)
“Why do you hate our kitchen?”
Love it.
LOVE IT!
I’m with Caroline….
That is too funny. Of course I am only laughing because I can totally relate. My husband would have hung his in his home office with the many dead animals that adorn the walls. I do mean many. We also have some turkey tails. You get the picture. When my sister who lives in San Antonio bought a new house in Garden Ridge I tried to give her a dear head. I said ” what is a Texas house without a dear head hanging on the wall”. Her husband quickly replied, “a nice Texas house.”
I enjoy your blog.
I just reaized I misspelled deer. Not only are we rednecks, I am a redneck that can’t spell.
I see a future Miss NRA in your future… Plus, she’ll have that gun talent thing down by that time.
And here I thought Caroline was the president of the Junior NRA. Clearly she has no appreciation of such important statements. Tsk, tsk.
Just so you know, Shep is still totally obsessed with hunting, although still a little conflicted about it. We went to the museum last week and he told everyone there that hunters had shot the animals in the display. At the zoo we saw an owl, and you know the conversation that spurred. He spelled out “hunter” with the refrigerator magnets, and this morning I heard him telling Eva Rose that his grandpa had shot a big bird.
Evidently a little P goes a long way. So maybe P should take Shep with him next year.
i like the sign…i would actually probably be willing to hang it in my living room…but i kinda like the old looking signs and political type stuff…
however my signed framed JFK poster that Ive had for 15 years got removed from my office shortly after we got married…it offended C that I really have a thing for JFK
Steff
P doesn’t stand a chance…two drama queens in the house!!! (My brother is a charter member of the NRA AND has a den in the basement with a Earnhardt theme and handles on the kitchen cabinets handmade by HIM from Deer Antlers!! I’m not joking) I’m still belly laughing y’ll! AND I’ve spent some time getting caught up here with OTHER things on your blog. So…
For sure…you want to take things you will leave behind. Don’t take anything with you that is precious. If the airlines doesn’t lose it on the way down, you will feel impelled to give everything away. Hand lotion, boots, clothes, reading glasses, shampoo, Advil. All of those comfort items, take to leave. (Definitely don’t take that Beautiful framed picture of Caroline!!)
If you take the NRA banner, someone will want it. Now there’s a good idea!!! It’s probably sturdy fabric that will make a tote bag or a head scarf for someone!!!
Fast and loose! ;D Nice!
I think you should leave it up!
Perhaps you could affix the liberty/security sign to P’s car bumper. With gorilla glue. The gift that keeps on giving.
CRACK me up. Glad to know there are no self esteem issues to concern yourself with.
I live in the Valley. It was Hurricane Dolly. Our small town was a direct hit. The winds started before 7am and didn’t end until after I went to bed that night. We were in the eye for over an hour because even though it wasn’t a HUGE hurricane, it was SLOW. Thank you to your husband for helping our Valley recover.
She knows her stuff. I would have put it on the back porch in the laundry room behind closed doors!!!
If I were Caroline, I would be upset too. What a beautiful picture.
That was excellently written, with the pictures posted just right! I’m impressed. And that photo is just too cute. She looks just like P in that picture.
that made me chuckle… so funny.
love it!!! Now, BigMama, I have to ask… where have the big boo casts gone? i miss them. oh i miss them dearly.
I’m just now reading today…And, oh my word, you are FUNNY.
Thanks for always filing my breakfast moments with a laugh.
You’re like my David Letterman of the breakfast.
And, for that, I will be truly grateful.
I started reading your gun-lovin posts to my teenage son and he asked if he could write you a letter to see if you would adopt him. I ordered him a copy of “Cheaper than Dirt” instead. So I think you’re safe.
I have a 29 y.o. son who started shooting targets when he was 5. He was so proud just like Caroline. Looked like a miniature rambo all camo’d out when he went hunting with his daddy.
He’s now 6’3″, 265 lbs. and has a man room at his house. It’s full of all the antlers, signs, NRA magazines and guns that I finally got to clean out of my house!!! The conversation was,”Mom, why can’t you keep my stuff for me?” My reply,”I just love it, but wouldn’t want to deprive you of it at your house.”
Maybe you can send Caroline all of her “gun” stuff when she grows up and has her own home. I’m sure she will enjoy it.
I just love your blog. It always makes me laugh!!!!
I don’t get it. Will you please explain why you think security is more important than liberty? As someone else once said: Give me liberty or give me death.
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