Every year for the last eighteen years, Gulley and I pick one weekend in early December and declare it our “Christmas Shopping Weekend”.
Oh, we are clever with our unique terminology!
This year started like every other year, and by that I mean every other year since we’ve had kids. Back in our college days most of our time was spent looking for a cute outfit to wear New Year’s Eve and charging it to someone’s daddy’s Visa card. Shout out to the Guess boot shoes of 1992!
Now we start at Toys ‘R Us. Rumor has it that it’s where a kid can be a kid and, while that is all good and fine, it’s also a place where mothers have been known to instantaneously double up on their birth control pills. I can’t explain how loud and chaotic the store was on Friday night. There were kids crying and begging on every single aisle. Who on earth thinks it’s a good idea to take a kid to a toy store?
Gulley and I just stood next to our cart and gazed blankly at a huge wall of Star Wars toys. She asked me if I thought the DC-17 Skywalker Fighter Jet (probably not it’s real name because, PLEASE) was better than the Rebel Fighter blah, blah, blah and I was all like “Why are you speaking to me in a foreign language? No comprendo El Star Wars.”
About that time we realized that not only were we overwhelmed by all the kids being kids, but also by the fact that Toys ‘R Us was clearly charging upwards of $5.00 more than Target. So, we headed for greener pastures.
Once we were in Target things weren’t necessarily any easier. The prices were better, but we still had no clarity on whether the Rebel Forces are the good guys or if a Tinkerbell Stylin’ Head is better than an Island Princess Barbie Stylin’ Head or how Puppini stuffed animals manage to look trampy even though they’re just dogs.
The one thing I did know was that if Santa doesn’t show up at my house with a Diamond Castle Barbie Horse and Carriage it is going to be sad times. And Target was sold out, which is ironic considering that I’ve seen that dang Diamond Carriage every time I’ve been at Target for the last two months but refused to buy it early because I didn’t know where I’d hide it for the next two months since, guess what Barbie, not everyone lives in a castle.
We did manage to find several other things on our lists and decided we better find some shopping nourishment in the form of Italian food. Over dinner we discussed a variety of topics, including our thoughts on global economics and whether or not we agreed with People magazine’s declaration of Hugh Jackman as the sexiest man alive.
Saturday morning we got up bright and semi-early, stopped at Starbucks and then threw caution to the wind by making our way to Walmart.
And this is where I owe Walmart a huge apology because I have never been a fan. However, not only did Walmart have the dadgum Diamond Castle Carriage, it was also clean and orderly. No one is more surprised by this turn of events than me, but I found it to be a delightful shopping experience. In fact, it restored any Christmas cheer I’d lost the day before.
After a long day fueled by caffeine and sugar cookies, we stumbled through my back door and dropped all our packages in the middle of the living room.
We made sure we had all the proper food groups at our disposal.
And we began the arduous task of wrapping everything we’d purchased.
Finally, in the wee hours of the morning, we were done.
So, basically, I’m ready for Christmas.
I only have one question.
When did Ken start wearing v-neck sweaters?
He and Barbie are never going to make it if he doesn’t lose the sweater.
And the kicky messenger bag.
















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As long as Ken stays away from the skinny jeans, we’ll be doing okay!
He does however, need to go ahead and lose that v-neck………like, yesterday.
Congrats on getting finished with your Christmas shopping! I love that you go ahead and wrap everything!
Ken needs to get on your blog and read Fashion Friday….what was he thinking????? Does he think folks will buy him dressed like that????…. and I sure hope Barbie makes him change his outfit before she lets him in her new Diamond Castle Carriage!!!! Man….
Good for you! I have also noticed how
Wal-Mart has been stepping it up a bit.
I just about fell out at the Ken doll. Thank goodness Lael could care less about the “boy barbies” because that is just…well…wrong.
I agree that Ken needs a makeover. Ken used to be so macho and manly. Hard to look that way in that sweater.
That is great that you’re done with your shopping and wrapping. If you’re bored you can come to my home and wrap my presents. That’s the part I don’t like doing and I always wait until the last minute to do it.
I live in the home of Wal-Mart and I’m so glad you found it doesn’t stink! Ha!
Oh it must feel good to be done!!!!!!!!
You have just moved to the rank of overachiever in my book. What are you going to do for the next 17 days since all your presents are done?
ok…is it me or does Ken have a creepy resemblance to Owen Wilson????
P
I was thinking the whole time reading your post “I bet Walmart would have it… She should’ve gone there” and then, lo and behold!
While, yes, I am truly Target’s biggest fan, and have probably paid my local store’s light bill on occasion, I must say, Walmart is my back up. and it is usually even a few dollars cheaper there.
(I had to rethink how much I was ‘passing time’ in Target — with the Starbucks in hand and toddler in buggy — while my son was in half day kindergarten years ago. One of my not even two year old little girl’s first full sentences was when she told her babysitter “my mama works at Target”.
Bless her, I took her in there so often I guess she thought I was always taking her to work with me.)
Congrats on finding all you needed! And without having to resort to ebay!
Walmart isn’t as bad as it seems – at times. Y’all definitely did some shopping with all those bags. Oh, my stars! And, Big Mama, I know you rebuked us last week for focusing on the details, but are those shiny sunglasses atop Ken’s head in the last photo, or just a glare? P’s right-he does look like Owen Wilson…Ken just needs some scruff on that chin of his….
Envious that you finished your Christmas shopping…but all I have to say is…
Why would there even be a debate about whether Hugh Jackman is the sexiest man alive??!! Have you seen this example of perfection? He’s a tall, dark, built, smart, humble, dedicated family man with a sense of humor who can sing, dance and ride a horse. And he’s beautiful to boot. It doesn’t get better than that. Debate?? No, only drool.
Looks to me like Ken doesn’t exactly want to “make it” with Barbie . . . if you know what I mean.
You tell that darling Caroline of yours what a lucky little girl she is to have so many packages under her tree. I have three girls who are getting about three gifts each (of course, two are teenagers and their gifts now cost a lot more than all those toys combined). And then they have to SHARE their “big gift”–a Wii thingymadoodle from Costco.
Is that a collectible Michael Stipes Ken Doll?
1. Ken is metro as all get out.
2. I would like to open some of the gifts underneath your tree, particularly any that have pink on the front of their package.
3. Can you please come and wrap by gifts for me?
Two questions are begging to be answered.
1. Who had the kids?
2. Was this a weekend getaway or did you combine a sleepover in this???
1. One can say what they want about Wal-Mart, but you typically can’t beat their prices.
2. Those packages with the pretty pink and green ribbon bows make me wish those were mine.
3. Apparently Ken doesn’t read Fashion Friday or he wouldn’t be caught dead wearing that goofy sweater.
Have you not heard that Barbie and Ken DIVORCED last year? I mean, seriously, a doll divorcing? But it happened.
Wonder if it was because of the sweater…..
And kudos to the cute wrapping paper….
Wow! Metro-sexual Ken. Does he come with extra accessories like a gift card for a manicure and extra man-bag.
Oh goodness, I nearly peed my pants when saw that Ken doll. I’m glad other agree!!
Apparently the old manly Ken of yore has been transformed into metro sexual Ken
.
Wait…I just followed the link to the Puppini thing, and I absolutely had to come back just to say:
What in the world???
One more thing… I just saw the movie Australia yesterday and Hugh Jackman is most definitely worthy of the title I can tell you that – Lord have mercy.
A future up and comer however is Robert Buckley! He was just on that TV Special Flirting with 40 (yes I admit I DVR’d and watched it this weekend)with Heather Locklear and he is one mighty fine specimen – even if he is only a mere 27 years of age!
Okay, to answer a few questions. Yes, he does resemble a bizarro Owen Wilson.
Yes, Ken is wearing shiny sunglasses because he obviously believes in accessories.
Gulley’s husband kept her kids, Mimi and Bops kept Caroline and P headed to the ranch so we would have my house all to ourselves for the wrapping party festivities.
Well, I don’t know about you, but I think Huge Jackman is gorgeous and they made the right choice:-) I just hope he’s not into V-neck sweaters… Ken looked a little feminine in my opinion.
Way to go getting all your shopping done! I have to decide what Star Wars toys to get too. Think he’d be happy with a Ken doll instead??? ha.
Hey, at least Ken has the dark designer-looking jeans down! He must have bought the rather deep v-neck sweater in 1996 at the Gap. As you said, the economy is down and you must make things work!
I have found Wal-Mart is quite pleasant in the wee hours of the morning.
Don’t you miss the Barbie Dream House with the elevator? I always wanted that when I was a kid instead I got the dream cottage. Nice, but no elevator.
Be thankful your child is not into Pokemon. I can’t even began to decode that language.
Robyn’s right! Barbie and Ken had a falling out last year and she is now with some tan Australian guy (Blane? Blake? Hugh Jackman?).
I think it’s because Ken switched interests… to other Ken’s. Just look at his face in the clip art on the bottom corner. It’s obvious. Don’t Barbie and Ken have a kid together? Tommy or something… poor kid. I don’t know how Barbie will explain this one.
Love your blog by the way
The economy is surely in complete disarray if Wal-Mart was clean AND orderly and free of people with barefoot family members calling each other “Bubba” and eating out of food boxes they have not yet purchased. Hope is shining bright this Christmas season!
Seriously, what IS with the Puppini dogs?! That’s ALL that my five year old wants this Christmas, and I already hate the ho-dogs. After two years of swearing off Bratz dolls for that very reason, now I’m going to share my house with a couple of trampy dogs? Nice.
And, is it just me, or does all of the Diamond Castle stuff look like it’s going to be broken by Dec. 25th? Cheap plastic junk is so hard to spend 50 bucks on!
I’m sure it’s an illusion, but Ken also appears to have thinning hair.
That dang horse with a carriage is going to be the death of me. Our Target and Toysrus are out too. I’ll be heading to Wal-Mart next. Or else I’ll be coming up with a great story about how Barbie Mermaidia got legs and stole the horse pulling a carriage.
Amanda, my previous commenter, YES! That’s all I noticed about Ken. I’ve read all the comments, and with the exception of the Michael Stipes Ken Doll comment (awesome), nobody mentioned what appears to be a shaved head on Ken! Are we the only ones who see it?
Dude, MY Ken dolls only looked like that AFTER I took the scissors to their puffy girl-hair.
Okay seriously, what happened to Ken?!
I too ventured into Toys R Us…twice. God help me. Anyway, after I bought Liana and Alexa, I went to Target…WHERE THEY WERE FIVE DOLLARS CHEAPER. What’s up with that?! Anyway, once again Target has proven they are my friends. And Wal-Mart…well, I agree. They are better than they used to be. But I’m still a Target girl at heart!
And those cookies look scrumptious – I need to eat breakfast now.
Ken is looking a bit effeminate.
We about live in Walmart, we’re there all the time. Target not so much, although I did buy some of our Christmas at Target this year.
Bad Ken, bad!
We’ve got ours wrapped too, well, at least the ones we’ve got. Still have more to go. And our kids do not want them under the tree. Said we have to wait and put them out like Santa would (and they are 14 and 17) Go figure!!
I think that is the “Cameo Appearance on Lost in Space” Ken doll you got there.
I’m glad others noticed Ken’s resemblance to Owen Wilson. I was beginning to think I’d watched Zoolander and Wedding Crashers a few too many times. And what’s up with the man purse?
Kudos for having your shopping done! I have yet to start on the non-Santa items. I kind of want to wrap up a little cash for everyone and tell ‘em to knock themselves out at the after-Christmas sales.
Obviously Ken didn’t play with his Star Wars toys enough! V-neck sweater…just wow!
Oh, I love our Super-Walmart! Especially the fact that it’s three minutes from my house.
Metrosexual Ken, yeah, that’s what Barbie’s world was lacking! Puh-lease!
Athat must be Metrosexual Ken. OMG! Looks like y’all had a fantabulous day
A guy obviously designed Ken’s ensemble. And a board of men signed off on it. Now it really does make me think of Burt Reynolds!
Obviously Ken’s gone metro on us. Who would’ve thunk? GI Joe was always better in my opinion anyway. He had real hair.
And yeah, I live in the home of Wal-Mart, and my Daddy works for Wal-Mart so I’m partial. But I do loves me some WM! Especially at Christmas.
Michael Stipes?? Ken looks more like George Michael to me…minus GM’s dark features and hairy-ness. Ok, what I mean is, if Ken were to come to life in the ensemble he’s rockin’ in the box, his mannerisms would resemble George Michael to a tee I’m pretty sure.
You’re so funny! I love reading your site. Congratulations for getting your shopping done. I use to hate WalMart but I discovered that all WalMart’s are not created equal – the one in our town is disgusting but drive twenty miles to the next town and they have a really nice clean one…go figure!
That Ken strangely resembles a much younger Steve Martin.
Ewww.
I am afraid we may hear next that Ken has gone the other direction and no longer has interest in the blonde bombshell we all know and love.
Messenger bag, my eye…that’s a MAN purse.
I’m still hoping for a fashion comeback for Ken’s brown suede vest with the fringes dangling down the bottom. When you strapped him into the boogie-stage they shimeyed back and forth. It was Barbie’s Wonderland back then. I’m also glad to know Barbie has upgraded because you know – the best place mine lived was in her suped up Barbie camping van. My Barbie was a pioneer, Big Mama. Long live the days when….
I don’t even know where to start, I loved the whole thing! Too funny.
Since when does Ken not have plastic hair???? Where have I been?
I live in a place where wonderful target is an hour drive away, so we have to make do with wal-mart unless we plan a fancy shopping trip to a big city. I however, do avoid wal-mart as much as possible. But the past few times I have been into our hometown Wally World it has seemed much cleaner and friendly-er.
Ohhh…to be a mother of a just barely teen daughter, who has only asked for DVD’s, CD’s and a Digital Camera. I do not miss nor long for the days in which I too had to trudge into Toys R Us and the like…NOPE, not at all. I feel for you!! When it comes to the whole Target vs Wal-Mart…I am in the middle…it totally depends on WHICH Wal-Mart, because some of them ARE downright disgusting. Luckily the one by my house is not. I noticed that Targets gone up on their prices some…which saddens me…but Wal-Mart is off the chain…(i have always wanted to say that, I don’t even know if it is the right context…Merry Christmas!!!
Seriously… the real ribbons on the gifts, the wrapping snacks you have out… we could very literally have been separated at birth.
I am so darn impressed that you are done shopping and wrapping. You should be proud =)
Personally, I think that v-necks are sweet! But Ken’s, however, is ridiculously ugly. And his shirt underneath. If only he had a button-up shirt underneath and a less 60-year-old-man design on the sweater, he’d be set. And no purses for guys.
It would seem that the V-neck and messenger bag is Mattel’s attempt to send Ken to college, preferably ivy league…leaving Barbie in the dust…and hinting not so slightly at a Legally Blonde plot rip off.
Okay, y’all. That’s enough with the comments about Wal-Mart. Here I sit in Australia, Wal-mart-less and sad and I’m gonna cry if you don’t stop.
(
We’ve got K-mart though.
I heard that Ken left Barbie when she got her breast reduction done, but from the looks of Ken, I think that’s just a cover up.
Check the pose on the bottom of the box. Uh-huh.. what did I tell ya? Yep. He’s gone beyond just metro-sexual.
My sides hurt a little bit from all the laughter.
I no comprendo El Star Wars either. ?!?!
And Puppini? Well.
And Man-Purse Ken? Um.
You’re delightful.
What fun! I love that you have a wrapping party with Gulley when you’re done with the shopping. Sounds like good times…
I’m seriously impressed! Everything bought AND wrapped…way to go. I’m feeling the need to get busy.
Ok, so accuse me of looking far too closely at ken, but is that a pocket on the thigh of his jeans? Also a deal breaker, Barbie. You can do so much better!
Since Wal-Mart is going to get sued over the guy getting trampled to death after Thanksgiving they have been beefing up the stores.
I heard Barbie kicked Ken to the curb a while ago. I bet it’s because she found him trying on her clothes and they got into a fight over her purse.
Love your site, your blog is fabulous!
I envy your ability to be on top of your Christmas shopping. I’m a procrastinator, it’s terrible. An I’m even a Capricorn which thinking about it, is kind of ironic. But I loathe shopping.
And yes, Ken’s looking a little ‘metro’, these days.
Not that, that’s a bad thing. I suppose I do recall one of my Original Ken Dolls owning a Turquoise Tuxedo with a pink and white Alligator-print lapel! Oh dear.
Ken looks like Neil Patrick Harris.
Obviously Ken is more interested in GI Joe than Barbie.
M’kay is it just me, or does Ken look a little, um, er…SWEET, in this photo?
Ken looks more Euro than American. Barbie just needs to loose the made-up hair (more natural look), put on layered clothing and some cool boots and THEN they’d look like they go together.
My sis-in-law were out to pick up some Ken dolls for my girls (so Daddy can play Barbies too:))and I decided there was no way I handle Cali Metro Ken, so we got an Indiana Jones Mutt doll and GI Joe. Btw, I am serenading with the Believe song from Diamond Castle on a daily basis. Apparently sweet, innocent little kindergarten girls sing it on the swings at recess to impress the boys with their singing voices.
Did you, by chance, see the bit on The Soup about the Puppini dolls? H-I-larious.
While Hugh Jackman is sexy (esp. as Wolverine) I wouldn’t say he’s the sexiest. I’m still rather partial to Clooney myself.
http://sonotsouthbeach.blogspot.com
Oh my gosh. they made Ken gay!! Not that there is anything wrong with that.
I’m still trying to figure out why he is wearing a turtleneck under the v-neck? I’m fond of a man in a v-neck myself, as long as there’s a nice shirt underneath, but certainly not a turtleneck… and certainly not a turtle neck under a v-neck on man who isn’t 72 or older.
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