Listen.
Those cinnamon rolls were just the literal icing on the cake of food sins I committed in the last few days at the ranch. Forgive me, Jillian Michaels, for I have sinned; it’s been one week and 80,000 calories since my last confession or Shred workout or whatever.
I love that so many of y’all left comments or sent emails and have been all “Yeah, yeah, yeah you rode a horse. WHO CARES? What about the food?” It’s why I feel so close to you. Because as much as Peso and I had some precious time together riding on the prairie, it paled in comparison to how good this bread was that we ate with dinner Tuesday night.
When I took my first bite, I felt tears come to my eyes as I shoveled more in my mouth while asking, “Oh my word what is in this bread it is the best thing I have ever tasted.”
(Because apparently I use run-on sentences when I ask about delicious food)
Ree replied with an answer that would cause cardiologists everywhere to go ahead and buy that summer home on the lake they’ve been thinking about, “I just put a stick and a half of butter on each half of a loaf of french bread and bake it at 350 degrees until it kind of carmelizes.”
A stick and a half of butter.
On each half loaf.
Sure, it sounds like a recipe for heart disease but think of all the calcium.
The first night we were there we ate some jalapenos filled with cream cheese and wrapped in bacon, which was perfect because I love any recipe that combines my three favorite food groups.
And then Tuesday night we started with some homemade pico de gallo that was later mixed with some avocado. Together they were the most perfect pair since Donny and Marie.
(Please keep in mind that I am not a food photographer. I just play one on the blog.)
(Also, I didn’t get a picture of it mixed with the avocado because that would have required me to stop eating.)
When dinner was served, this is what it looked like.
I wish I could give more specific details, but I’ll tell you what I know. The meat was slathered in more butter and sprinkled with salt and pepper, then cooked. The corn had some sort of cream in it and something else and it was delicious. And the potatoes were full of yet more butter and some sour cream for good measure.
(The above descriptions are not exact recipes given the vague and probably inaccurate list of ingredients)
I could cry just thinking about the goodness.
I could also cry because I miss the Sponge Bob figure that Ree’s youngest son left at the Lodge for me to play with if I wanted to.
It’s not everyday that a little boy lets you borrow his horse and his Sponge Bob.
But it’s also not everyday that you eat about a pound of butter on one plate.
Sadly, it was time to head home yesterday so we said our goodbyes, grabbed our cinnamon rolls and hit the road, but not before I took one last look at the view from my bedroom window.
And at the pantry that caused me to add coveting to my list of sins.
And then we said what felt like an inadequate thank you to Marlboro Man and Ree for all the good times and good food. They are the best.
However, our day wasn’t over because when Shannon dropped Sophie and me off at the Tulsa airport, we met up with Kelly, her mama, and sweet little Harper. It was so much fun getting to meet them in person and I’m never one to pass up the chance to hold a sweet baby.
You can tell I have a real way with babies by how calm and peaceful Harper was in my presence.
Finally, I got on a plane and headed home to where my peeps were waiting on me.
And so was Jillian Michaels.
She’s going to make me pay the butter-filled piper by around 9:00 a.m.
Or maybe 10:00.
There’s no need to rush into anything.
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Sounds…and looks…like an amazing visit! Those cinnamon rolls and the bread both look like they are to DIE for! Bread has always been my downfall…
Thanks for sharing!
Looks like just what a little vacation should be…delicious.
My family sometimes complains that they don’t like this food or that food. And like any good Southern woman, I tell my husband and kids “put some butter and salt on it”. Then….we all clean our plates! Every vegetable in the world is delicious when you add butter and salt!!
Ree is a woman after my own heart!
I told Sophie this on her blog but I am one jealous girl because I triple love Ree’s food blog.
I swear that her Marlboro Man sandwhich cured my guy of his strep throat because of all the butter. Hand to God…
Oh yes – riding the horse was just so you’d have something to do between meals! When my college girls get together, we too are most interested in what we are going to eat. We organize a database on Yahoo and make a theme and everything!
so jealous you got to eat PW’s cooking and got to stay at the lodge. Then you got to meet sweet Harper to top it off- sounds like y’all had quite the vacation!
Oh that view! I am so jealous…I want to move to a ranch, even though that would mean giving up my Southern Belle life here…I wouldn’t be giving up the good food because a pound of butter and bacon grease are staples in all of my MIL’s culinary pieces of work!
What a fun vacation with the girls! Jealous!!!
So glad you had an awesome time- but whoever doubted you would. And WE ALL KNEW the food would be the life & death of you- but honestly- it was worth it:) Right? I am sure your peeps missed you terribly and are glad to have their Big Mama back. By the way – I am confident the horseback riding burned up some of that butter- so it’s all good.
Oh, the butter. Oh that view! Glad you had fun.
BigMama, you are so famous! I’m surprised Jillian doesn’t come to your house every morning. (Then you’d have to put away the snacks and such though).
gussy
I’m not telling Jillian anything about the butter. Promise. Besides, the only reason she’s so mean is because she’s jealous. More butter just makes people happy.
Don’t care what anyone says, I’m going to eat my banana bread (with chocolate chips for contrast) and stick to my theory.
All the best.
Love this post. Because it’s All. About. The. Food.
Plus, it’s just WRONG that butter is so fattening when it makes everything, with the possible exception of ice cream, so delicious.
HOW FUN!!!!!! And I’m so jealous you got to meet Kelly, her momma, and precious Harper!!!! I know, I know, I need to look up the scripture in the bible on jealousy, LOL!!
i would have commented sooner, but i was on the floor laughing uproariously and litterally peeing in my pants (i know TMI, but really!! i’m dying)
i just returned from out west, and i’m happy to say i left jillian at the airport when i left, and managed to dodge her for almost two weeks.
now i’m back, and after eating my way through the state of colorado, i’m letting jillian kick my rolling thighs/a*s.
heavy sigh.
i’m with paula deen. everything is better with a stick of butter.
hilarious post. thanks for the laugh. next time i’m wearing depends.
That is the most awesome pantry I’ve ever seen in my life. And it has a ladder. Is the ladder just for short people (like me) or do regular people need it to reach the top shelves too. Please tell me it is for regular people.
What a lucky woman you are! I’m so jealous you got to meet Ree and stay at the lodge.
Looks like a wonderful time!
Finally…the food!! I am so jealous, Ree has such awesome recipes!
I am sooooo hungry now. And really wanting to visit that ranch.
I love the pictures, and my mouth is actually watering over that pico de gallo…with a side of that bread of course.
Glad you had a good time!
All I could think as I read this post was Michael Myers saying it was like ” butta” Only it really, really was.
Is it a problem that my keyboard is dripping with drool after reading that post??? Sounds like you had a wonderful time!
All that food sounds delicious!! YUM! And just don’t tell ol’ Jillian. She’ll just make you feel guilty and do 20 extra minutes of the death video.
This is a side question, but do you moonlight as an operator/CSR for AT&T Wireless? I had to call them last week and the lady told me her name was Ginger, but her voice sounded exactly like yours from your videos. I kept wanting to say “But Big Mama, my Blackberry was working before you did that, and now it isn’t.”
Is it psycho if I take that picture of you and Sophie and Kelly and Harper and photoshop me and Annabeth into it? It is? Okay, well it’s not like I’d know how to do that anyway. So glad y’all had fun!
Looks like so much fun! I don’t think I would ever be able to leave Ree’s ranch.
I can only think of one word….
LUCKY!!!
What an honor and exciting trip!
What a fun trip! I know Ree and Paula Deen must be very close. Do you think that if I copied Ree’s pantry she’d mind, I love it!
How fun for all of you! Pray you had a safe trip home.
If you were able to do The Shred this AM after riding a horse earlier this week, I admire you more than I already did:) WOW!
I’m sure your family was VERY glad to see you!
Have a great day and blessings always,
Kaye
Matthew 21:22
That was one of the most Hilarious things I’ve ever read! I love that you consider the Calcium in butter, I try to do the same! I mean really, the glass is half full!
I love how you can make me laugh so hard that tears start to fall.
It is just so amazing to me that my favorite bloggers all got together! And then when I read that you met up with Kelly & Harper, my jaw hit the floor.
You are such a blessing to so many! Thanks for sharing, and adding laughter to my day!
I was thinking about Jillian the other day when I read your comment about being saddle sore… I was going to remind you that though you ate Ree’s amazing cooking, you probably got a really good thigh work out, and I’m sure it balances out somehow. I mean, look at how cute Ree is!
(I’m still jealous by the way)
Looks like Sophie has a tan–yeah!! :0)
And I loved the title of this one, Melanie…priceless. I’m so happy that God has given y’all such adventures. It tickles me to death!
That’s probably the yummiest avocado I’ve ever seen in that first picture.
Is it bad that I want to run home and use 3 sticks of butter to make a loaf of french bread?!?!?!? Oh, Jillian would NOT approve!!
You can always judge a vacation by the food. Great food makes a great vacation, bad food makes a bad vacation.
It sounds like you had a great time with some great food.
Thank you, thank you for this wonderful post. I feel like I went on vacation and forgot the Texas heat. Almost.
Oh yes this is what I like to hear, the food!!! Oh the food. I can almost taste that bread! How fun.
Yes Jillian will be happy to have you back shredding, eek!
“It’s not everyday that a little boy lets you borrow his horse and his Sponge Bob.”
Too sweet. My son would *so* love Ree’s son, I think.
Thanks for a great read, Big Mama!
I ought to do my own confession. I’ve had The Shred in my cabinet with the other DVDS (if she’s out in the open, I’d have to think about her and then come up with reasons not to exercise) for a good month now.
That is so sweet that Ree’s son lent you his Sponge Bob…I think that says a lot about your character. You must be very trustworthy.
That is so cool that ya’ll got to meet up!
So when you announced that you were at the PW ranch, I said I was so jealous I could vomit. I spent hours in the bathroom on Tuesday night throwing up. It’s possible that it’s the migraine at fault… be we can’t be too sure, can we?!
I shall name my extra 10 (o.k. – fifteen) pounds Doritos, chocolate, and Pepsi. You crack me up…
And that food looks really good…
Don’t you know that calories don’t count when you’re on vacation???
You had me at mashed potatoes! s
I had all kinds of guilt when I hit “send” on a tweet to Sophie that said, “Yea, she rode a horse, but what about the food?” I shouldn’t have minimized your Great Feat in any way. But then, I knew that you were exactly the sort of person who would understand the Great Import of The Food and a need for Precise Description.
But “well done” on that horse thing…
Just remember, Anita is your best friend. And Natalie … well, I’m waiting for her to fall on her you know what (the word Jillian says in 2 of the 3 workouts).
Okay, can I just say that I am green with jealousy? I have always considered you, Rocks in My Drier, and Boo Mama, and Ree to be the blogland queens… I had no idea that you guys were like, hanging out and stuff. I’ve never commented here because there are always so many comments I figured you don’t have time to read the ones you get already, but now I just have to say, “Will you be my friend too?”
Definitely focus on the calcium…and more importantly the good times!
Ok-I know I am #49 and you may not read this…
I loved looking at the food pictures…but I get more angry looking at amazing food I cannot possibly eat than I do excited about it so most of those pictures ticked me off! :0 Just kidding (not really)
BUT….what I REALLY want to know is the details on the necklace you have on in the picture with Kelly, BooMama and Harper! ???? Details please!!!!!
And I am really not angry over the food pictures…not anymore, anyway!
Jillian could use some butter, too! I love the food!
Looks like you all had so much fun!!!
Wow! You’ve been to my hometown and survived:-) Sounds like you all had a great time. That dinner made my mouth water! yum!
Holy canoly! That all looks so good. I am drooling over the bread. When i read your first post i was so excite about the horses i totally forgot the food. I am on a crazy strict diet and have banned all food from my mind. So sad
Oh, those mashed potatoes. sigh.
All my blog heroes together! With butter to boot!
CAN LIFE GET ANY BETTER?
I don’t think so..
Jillian schmillian.
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