P and I began dating in March of 1995. That means that we’d almost been dating for one year when our first Valentine’s Day as a couple rolled around. I was hoping for a ring. Instead, I received a large tin full of cinnamon-flavored popcorn. It’s not that the popcorn wasn’t delightfully delicious as much as the fact that there wasn’t a diamond solitaire anywhere in that tin. And, trust me, I looked long and hard and very subtly as I ate an entire tin of popcorn in three and a half minutes under the guise of being hungry.
The problem was, even after a year of dating, I didn’t know P well enough to know that he wasn’t a fan of any holiday that he deems to be a passel of lies being sold to the American public. I should’ve realized it when he chose to spend our first New Year’s Eve hunting at the ranch with his friends instead of taking me out to a romantic New Year’s Eve dinner which led us to spend the first day of 1996 breaking up as we argued over what constitutes a holiday (according to him a holiday isn’t a day that falls during the height of deer season) but love is blind and optimistic.
Now, fourteen years, a wedding ceremony, one mortgage, a child and two dogs later, I totally agree with him on the whole made-up holiday thing. Oh sure, you may say that he’s trained me to disregard Valentine’s Day and New Year’s Eve, but it’s really no different than how I trained him to do his own laundry after one week of marriage. Frankly, I think I got the better end of that deal.
And just to be clear, we haven’t robbed Caroline of the Valentine’s Day experience. In fact, she got a Hello Kitty DVD and a new pair of binoculars this year because that’s what she wanted and how is a girl supposed to get by without her own pair of optics when she’s afield?
The thing about P is that he does really nice things for me all year long. He gets up first in the morning and turns off the ceiling fan so I don’t freeze, he brings me flowers for no reason, he doesn’t ever care when I announce that I’m too tired to cook and I’m calling in some Mexican food to go, and he never questions the fact that every purchase I bring into the house was bought for the bargain price of $15.00. And last week he completely outdid himself and installed a new kitchen faucet (even though he killed my farmhouse sink dream) and hung my new curtain rods.
Remember when I wrote about Holly and how she was helping me make some changes to my living room? And then remember how I showed the bird cage and the old suitcase that I found at the antique store? And then remember how I haven’t said anything else about it in a month?
One of the things Holly suggested was that I add some drapes in the living room. What Holly didn’t know was that I am deathly afraid of window treatments. They intimidate me. I blame it on some ill-conceived JC Penney drapes that P and I had in our first apartment. They were so unfortunate with their green swag of fabric draped across the top.
But Holly insisted that drapes were the way to go and I was too embarrassed to tell her about my long-standing drape phobia. We began to look for fabric and ultimately found this beautiful Robert Allen fabric that was on sale at Fabrics.com for $6.95 a yard. It was exactly what I wanted, something soft and subtle that would add some texture to the room and coordinate with the fabric we’d chosen for some new pillows.
However, I let my fear keep me from committing to the fabric purchase until Holly told me that I needed to go ahead and buy it because it was great fabric at an unbelievable price. She even calculated that I’d need about fourteen yards and I’m forever grateful to her for doing that bit of math for me because I don’t know what my guess would’ve been other than JUST WRONG. So I went online to order the fabric and it had been reduced to $1.95 a yard. ONE DOLLAR AND NINETY-FIVE CENTS A YARD. You can’t buy burlap for $1.95 a yard.
Or maybe you can. I really have no idea.
Procrastination has never served me so well. I ordered all the fabric I needed for less than $30.00. But then Holly began to mention words to me like “drapery lining” and “sewing machine” and I felt frightened all over again. I actually own a sewing machine but only because my mother-in-law was getting rid of it and asked me if I wanted it and why would I turn that down? That would be akin to admitting that I’ll never learn to sew and I’m totally going to learn how to sew. SOMEDAY.
Holly realized that all the sewing might never happen and the drapery lining was wishful thinking at best, so she suggested that I might want to just “mistreat” the windows with the fabric a la The Nester. (If you don’t read The Nester, you are missing out on a veritable wealth of home decorating information) I knew that Sophie had mistreated her windows with much success and since I know she and I function at about the same level of non-crafty, I felt that there was hope for me and the mistreating of the windows.
So I bought new curtain rods and clip rings at Lowe’s. Then God smiled on me and it rained all day Thursday causing P to say out loud in my presence, “I’m bored”. Which led to this pleasant development.
I don’t know that he’ll ever utter the words “I’m bored” again.
I rolled all fourteen yards of fabric out as best I could given the fact that I don’t have a room that’s fourteen yards long and then I nearly caused my brain to explode as I tried to compute the measurements of how much fabric I needed to cut for each window. A timely call from Sophie saved me from what would have been a terrible tragedy because I was about to cut the fabric right down the middle because I was in way over my head.
Words can’t describe the level of stress I felt as I debated cutting into the fabric because Holly had stressed that it was very important that I line the pattern up and each panel needed to match. My head hurts right now just thinking about. But finally I looked at P who was sitting on the couch trying to figure out how on earth I’d decided I could make my own drapes and said, “Well, here goes nothing. At least the fabric only cost $28.00 if I totally screw this up.”
He replied, “Yeah, but if you screw it up you’ll never find that fabric at that price again.”
It wasn’t really the word of encouragement I was looking for. Also, please note that I told him the actual price of the fabric because it was such a good deal and I needed him to know how much money I’d saved him. It totally makes up for all the other $15.00 items we have around the house.
I took a deep breath, hyperventilated for several minutes and began to cut. And now I have drapes in my living room.
Here’s the before.
Let us never speak of that fake plant again. It was the devil’s foliage.
And here’s the after.
Please don’t mention that vast array of animal prints. I was a woman on the edge who just made my own curtains and I threw that pillow and the footstool over there. I’m not attempting any sort of safari theme.
New pillows and other accessories will be coming soon. And, no, I’m not making them myself.
But the good news is they’re only going to cost $15.00.
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wait, so you didn’t sew anything?! you just added clips to the fabric? i am SOOOO going to do that! a woman after my own heart. Off to check out “the nesting place”- thanks again!!!
xoxo,
erika
theurthmama.com
okay, i’m back- i have been reading “the nest” and I am HOOKED, sista!!! you have no idea how much i needed to read that blog- wowza. awesome!!! i’m getting my glue gun in the morning.
xoxo,
erika
theurthmama.com
How did you get the little “POOF” at the top????
http://www.thenester.com/2008/01/window-mistreatment-101-red-checks-style.html
The Nester spells it all out right here.
Looks fabulous!
WOW! I’m impressed!
Super cute. I love the mistreatment. You did good.
Love them! They turned out great. I have wanted to try this for so long, but have been intimidated. You have given me some confidence. Thanks!
They look great! True confession. I have a complex against any kind of commitment to decorating! And, true to form, I decided last year that I would decorate my house better (including the holidays) to make it more “us.” Ok, I have 2 boys, under 5, and a Hunter myself…..THEY COULD CARE LESS!
But, I’m presevering. I have mistreated 4 windows now. I have plans for drapes for my living room next, then the playroom, then re-painting the kitchen, then finishing the bedroom, then…I’m overwhelmed! One room at a time, one room at a time.
Those drapes look AWESOME!! You did a great job!! I am sooo in the mood to sew something, but my 10 year old son tried to “fix” my sewing machine and now it doesn’t work at all. I’m going to try some “mistreatments”. Thanks for the link to Fabric.com. Can’t wait to browse through the site. My window treatments for my breakfast area and kitchen only cost $5 for the fabric. Hopefully I can find as good of a deal as you did.
I think they look great! Wow!
Big Mama! I LOVE your window treatments! They are perfect and I can’t even believe they are no-sew! Love the fabric choice, too. Can you do a post about how to get that look?! I’d like to try something like that myself. Oh, I’m so glad P was bored….
Happy President’s Day!
ROTLFL!!!!!! I have read this whole thing out loud to my dad…and he was hyperventilating he was laughing so hard.
For the record, my purchases only cost $20. $15 sounds more realistic!
LOVE the curtains though….great job!
paige
Wow, those curtains are beautiful. I cannot believe you made them yourself?!? I think you are holding out on us with your crafty abilities
Wow! I am impressed. You have inspired me to make my own “mistreatments”. You should be very proud of yourself, they look great.
Gorgeous!! You did it!
LORDY I love your posts!!!! This one had me in stitches.
My Dove Milk Chocolate Promises and I congratulate you (yes, I’m aware of the time but there’s no limit to chocolate. You should know that though.)
I gotta go read this Nester blog. I have no drapes, curtains, window treatments in my whole house except the plantation blinds like yours.
I bet The Nester is going to get some more heavy traffic today.
I too have a fear of fabric…and I sort of know how to sew. Well, I can sew a straight line.
I think your mistreatments look fantastic!!! I browsed the fabric department in JoAnn’s yesterday trying to decide if I want to try mistreatments in my kitchen. I think I’ll start with some curtains made out of drop cloths in the Living room first.
I’m kind of over Valentines Day, myself. This year kind of cured me. T is still home recovering from minor surgery, so he told me I could pick out my own Vday present. That’s the best present he’s ever given me! After much debate, I chose a bamboo roman shade from Lowes. I’m gonna go buy it today. Way better than flowers or chocolate.
Good job on your windows!!!!
Looking great!
Lovely! And for the record, I do the same thing with my guy….when I see him doing his “I’m bored” pacing through the house, I hand him a project. : )
Wow, I am impressed! This gives me hope because I have major decorating phobia, and the only window “treatments” we have are mini-blinds.
And I laughed at the part of the popcorn tin – too funny!
Oh, you give me hope! Love it! Carry on.
Instead of $15 I tend to go with, “They were 40% off.” My hubby is a finance guy and that way when he looks at the credit card bill he can’t get mad when he sees how much it costs because I never reveal what the original price was!! I love the fabric by the way…$1.95/yard is unbelievable. I am going to have to check out fabrics.com.
Looks great, I’ve read the Nester, she rocks, before and I’m still not brave enough to hang anything up or repaint anything. where does this fear come from?
VERY IMPRESSIVE!!! Love them! I know you’ve got it in you, sister! I’ve seen your parade shoe box creations that you have “helped” Caroline with.
you go girl! love them
Time to explain how you did the poofy (you can tell I’m an interior decorator) thing at the top of them. They look great!
Gorgeous! Great job, I’m impressed! I am fortunate enough to have a girl friend who can sew ANYTHING! Love her;) Love the fabric too. I need window treatments for my dining room, I think I just found them.
I just had to laugh over your fear of sewing because I am totally the same way. Oh my gosh, I break out in hives in front of the sewing machine. Crazy!
But those windows are awesome and aren’t you sad that you didn’t try that sooner? What a great job!
I love them! You did such a great job!! Your home is beautiful(or as a certain someone would say, ” its darlin’,just darlin’”.) : )
Wow!! I too, am totally window-treatment phobic. I have some very cute “mistreated” clip hanging drapes in my kitchen that my BFF made for me last year (she did sew a liner to the back) and I love them. How did you get yours to do the little pouf on the top?? Great job.
Carol in NC
Holly and Nester are two of my favorite design blogs! My husband is much like P in his assessment of “Hallmark” holidays. One of his hunting buddies has it worse though, he told his wife not to schedule her induction until the Monday after deer season started this year…and she waited. That’s love.
Yeah!!! The curtains look amazing! Now can you teach me??
I just read the mistreating post….I have no idea what it says… I am VERY, VERY decorating-challenged! That’s why, after liiving in my house for almost 4 years, the only things I’ve hung on the wall are one cross picture that I JUST bought, a clock, and a mirror. It’s sad, really. But your windows look great!!!
Wow those look so great!! Good job!
The curtains look great!
Great window treatments – you should be proud of yourself. My fav part of this post is how P is a good man every day NOT just on the BIG holidays! I love it. I am married to a wonderful, funny, loving, FORGETFUL, hot, amazing man. Did I mention that he forgets things??? But he is respectful and loving every day. He is the man that gets out of bed at night with my 3 kids. He scraps the snow off my van every morning (And we live in Canada people.) He does thousands of things for me every day . . .
How lovely! And how exactly did you get the poufy part? I feel your pain over the drapes. I have “toppers” from Walmart and after 13 years, I really need to get some real draperies. Just saying that makes me hyperventilate.
Love them!!! Great job Melanie and P!!! I love teamwork and 15.00 accessories!!!
Looks fabulous!!!!!
Your curtains look really nice. Good job!
My husband brought home a cookie cake for Valentine’s Day. He knows the way to my heart. ;0)
So how did P propose to you if there was not a ring in the popcorn tin?
Oh my gosh, those drapes rock! You did a great job and I love the color and the pattern. Way to go! And there is nothing wrong with a little animal print.
And I am so glad that there is another woman out there who has trained her husband to do his laundry. DH won ‘t pick up his clothes so I refuse to wash them. I told him if I can’t tell what is dirty and clean then I’m not potentially washing clean clothes. So he does his own. It works for us.
Great job, they are beautiful! I too DO NOT do curtains…I’m deathly afraid.
Ooh, I can’t WAIT to figure out how to make those curtains–they look GREAT!!!
Yeah, my husband talks about the over-commercialization of holidays like Valentines…which he calls the Hallmark Holiday. However, he did make the trudge over to Wal-Mart for goodies for his girls…I just can’t focus on the fact that he made that trek early Valentine’s morning.
Wow…looks great!
There should be a little more description as to how you made them.
We’re all looking at them and going…..”not crafty?”. Huh?
That poofy part is classy!
You go girl…..we could call you The Intimidator!
Love the window ‘mistreatments’ — girl, that’s the only way to go.
I’m impressed with the window dressing, the length of this post , but most of all….
I’m impressed you were able to use the word ‘afield.’ Well played.
You did great! They are beautiful. And I’m not being condescending. I am seriously impressed. (I could never make drapes.)
I LOVE it! I love the wall color and the drapery color and the splashes of red. I guess I really need to check out The Nester!
GORGEOUS!
My head is hurting at the amount of money I paid to have window treatments made for just one room!
OK: I read all 48 comments ahead of mine to see if you revealed the easy answer to the “poof treatment” at the top of the curtains. On my way to The Nester, but I bet your explanation would have been easier and would have made mention of hunting, Uncle Ted and HEB.
LOVE it. That’s the best looking mistreated fabirc I’ve ever seen. You’ve inspired me to come down off the drapery ledge.
Ten points for using the word “afield.”
Love it! And the “Nesting Place” is now on my list of daily sites that I must visit, as is yours.
) Thanks!
Beautiful – just beautiful! I’m inspired for sure. I have the same fears and insecurities about drapes and fabric and sewing. Now YOU”VE intimidated me.
Wow! Those look wonderful! I need to put drapes in my bedroom but we can’t decide what we want that room to look like.
WOW! I am so impressed! I wish I’d seen this post before I bought my curtains at Target. Each panel cost $30 and they aren’t nearly as cool as yours. Well done! BTW, I love all the mixing of prints in your room. Just finished reading the H&G post on Ree’s site and Hyacinth says to make no excuses for your decor and do what you love. Good work!!
I’m really impressed. No sewing? Wow.
Great job on the curtains! The only reason there are curtains in my kitchen and living room is because the former owners of our house (who were friends of ours) left them for us. Thankfully they fit with my decorating scheme. Or maybe I built my decor around the curatins. I don’t think the world will ever know.
Girl, It looks so SO wonderful. You did good.
And oh the hyperventalation that almost happened to me at the thought of you cutting it down the middle!!! AHHHHH.
Doesn’t fabric soften and cozy up a room so much? And Holly is my favorite. I so want her to come to my house.
My fear is of plaster walls. We live in an old home and love it very much. But I’m very afraid to hang anything very heavy on the plaster..will it fall?…what if it’s in the wrong place and I knock a chunk out of the plaster? It’s stressful being an adult!
I have the same phobia of window treatments. So other than two valances and some hideous curtains in my bedroom that came with the house, my windows are just wooden blinds. I REALLY want some Roman shades for my french doors on the back of the house because the neighbors dog can see in through the bushes, and I hate that, but I have REALLY wanted them for 5 years now.
I also agree about the Valentine’s Day / New Years, and I don’t have a P. It puts too much pressure on people. I would prefer flowers “just because.” I am embarrassed by public displays of affection anyway, so having co-workers come in to my office to admire my flowers is PAINFUL. Bring some home that you picked up in line at the grocery store when you were buying mac ‘n cheese or something. You saw them and thought of me? WOW.
Oh my gosh they are beautiful! And can you please send P out to California?
I have a few windows that need some $15.00 drapes.
WOW. I am so impressed. Seriously, between you and the nester I might just try something myself. I love your fabric!
I’m also impressed at P’s willingness to hang the curtain rods. That’s better than flowers anyway!!
Hi there! Just popped into your blog and loved the long post….LOL. I’m impressed with the curtain b/c I TOO am Mathmatically challenged when it comes to project like that. YOU did great! And thanks to your sweet hubby for helping out!
Have a great week….Susan from Houston, TX!
NO SEWING? I so need the instructions on those…..please…..today…..don’t keep me waiting.
I am so glad to hear that I am not the only person with a fear of window treatments.
My hubby D and I agree on Valentines Day. It is more romantic that he buys me something on his time and not on the calendars timing! and I prefer decor items not hearts filled with chocolate!!! lol I know I know I am not human……..
Wasn’t St Valentine killed on Feb 14th??
anywho love love love the windows! Great job!!!!
Great looking curtains! and who cares about Valentine’s Day? I received exactly two ‘gifts’ from my hubby. Both included “Happy Valentine’s Day”…and that was all. One of those was at our business meeting at church where he’s the moderator. Hallmark didn’t make much off of us this year!
Oh, and tell P that he got a shout out from my two year old who’s sitting on my lap. “Whoa! Man up…working!”
So, how did you make them do that little poofey thing on top???
That fabric is so gorgeous! I love mistreating!
Very nice. I really like the draperies. The umm..silk ficus tree…. I hate to admit that I have a couple myself. I like the look of the huge tree until they begin to collect dust that I cannot seem to remove no matter how often I dust, spray with the silk plant cleaner, etc. I’ve even put them outside in the rain hoping the rain would beat the dust off ‘em. Alas my efforts were futile. I think mine may be going away soon.
I really like the draperies. The umm..silk ficus tree…. yeah, well… I hate to admit that I have a couple myself. I like the look of the huge tree until they begin to collect dust that I cannot seem to remove no matter how often I dust, spray with the silk plant cleaner, etc. I’ve even put them outside in the rain hoping the rain would beat the dust off ‘em. Alas my efforts were futile. I think mine may be going away soon.
That looks ridiculously good, I am so impressed!
The devils foliage..that made me chuckle.
Wow! I love the fabric choice and you did an awesome job!
Bless you and bless “Nester”! Ya’ll are just loverly! The curtains are just fabulous!!!
I’m so totally impressed with your window mistreatments and how CHEAP you got such great fabric! Way to go!
My husband and I are on the same page when it comes to V-day. I think it is much more meaningful if he gets me flowers, writes a nice note, does something sweet, cooks a meal, or buys candy, etc… JUST BECAUSE rather than because our society/culture told him to and jacked up the price. Neither of us expects anything big – just some quality time (which is actually huge). This year my parents where actually in town staying with us. We all cooked a nice meal together at home. In fact we grilled steak in the snow! We’ll probably by discounted V-day chocolate in the next few weeks though! Stock up while it’s on sale thanks to the “fake” holiday.
Sorry about the double post. Apparently, I’m having difficulty functioning today.
One of my favorite posts. Drapes look great. Everything costs around $12 here but I think your 15 is more believable. Can’t wait to see the how your finished room looks…..presently I am sitting in my den that several owners ago used to be a covered patio, and I’m looking at a big bowed leak in the ceiling, ruined carpet, and computer cords, printer and paper shredder strewn about. Insurance adjuster will not come until Sat. I will live vicariously through you.
I so love those drapes !!!!! they look so professional and expensive! you did a great job.
You and my husband would get along great. When he was in school, he was taught how to round DOWN to the nearest number. For example, if he bought something that was $39 he said it only cost $30.
Love the drapes by the way and are too scared of drapes in general. I’ve been married 15 years and still have never put up a single set.
LOVE it! Would love to know how to get the poof at the top, and what did you have to cut?
Good job on your drapes! So cute! How did you make the little poof thing at the top?? My hubby did celebrate Vday with me but he never gets me flowers on the day. He’d rather bring them home randomly through the year when they aren’t marked up 5x the normal price.
Love them! They look fabulous and that’s a truly amazing price on the fabric.
-FringeGirl
Your drapes look great! I love that you call them “mistreatments”. Also I really like your stone fireplace. Have fun with the decorating. I swear I must have been out sick on the school day when they taught all the other girls how to be domestic and decorate. I just don’t know how to do it and appreciate any and all ideas.
Love the curtains! Maybe I will try that or see what the ones from JCPenny’s look like when they arrive. So I have a fashion question. My favorite dark gray peacot got destroyed today when the wind blew it into the handles of my double stroller (I have 15 month old twins) so hubby took us all to the mall the evening to find no coats! So what would recommend for a replacement coat? I live in Houston so I keep thinking winter is over but it will be in the 20′s tomorrow morning. oh well, I might have to wait until the fall! Thanks!
OK, so that totally looks awesome and cost WAY less than I paid for my drapes, which I love but which make the room completely monotone because my husband refuses to paint it. One day I’m so going to paint it while he’s gone. Wanna come help?
Holy cow, that looks great! I am thinking I could maybe even maybe possibly do something like that, maybe. Perhaps.
Also, the new site looks awesome.
The mistreatments look awesome! Now can you teach us all how to get our husbands to do their own laundry? I’ve only been married for a year and a half…is that too late?
I also have a drape-phobia. It seems so overwhelming to me! I have seen the light through your post though and think maybe there is hope for me!
I also laughed out loud about P saying he was “bored”. My husband, a fisherman, does not dare utter words such as those because of what transpired above. Haha. Poor guys!
Thanks for the motivation… I can DO window treatments!
Wow! They look awesome. And it was kind of like visiting Pioneer Woman – you know seeing the butt shot of your man.
I am SO TOTALLY jealous of your shutters. And your ability to find anything for $15. You might find it funny, though, that I taught *MY* man (of 16 years) to do his own laundry after we first moved in together. He said to me, “Honey, I’m all out of whites.” And I said, “And that’s my problem . . . because . . .?” I never looked back. And he still does his own laundry. Next up: My 7-year-old son . . .
What a beautiful job, BigMama! Those look wonderful. You just might have inspired me to do the same.
Thanks for sharing this & the Nester. I did some mistreated windows today too. Yours look great & I can’t wait to find a deal on fabric and use the fold, clip & poof technique.
They’re beautiful! BUT….how did you hem them?? Where do you buy these ‘clips’?
Can you share where you got your rods? That is the look I am going for. Are they wood or metal?? Love the drapes. You did an awesome job!!
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