Have you ever eaten one pack of Reese’s peanut butter cups and thought they were so delicious that you should eat another pack and then maybe another pack? And then before you knew it you were lying on the couch with a raging stomach ache vowing that you’d never again succumb to the delicious temptation of chocolate mixed with peanut butter especially if it meant you never had to hear Barbara Walter’s voice again?
Yeah, me neither.
But, hypothetically, that experience would be very similar to my Friday spent watching the Royal Wedding. Except substitute Reese’s peanut butter cups with ABC television coverage of William and Kate’s nuptials.
And I loved every minute of it.
I didn’t stay up all night to watch the whole thing live because God gave man the ability to invent the DVR. However, as soon as I dropped Caroline off at school on Friday morning, I came home, fired up the DVR and watched the ENTIRE THING. I saw seating charts of Westminster Abbey and a largely unfortunate assortment of hats (I’m looking at you, Beatrice and Eugenie) and listened to Barbara Walters until I completely regretted my decision to make ABC my royal viewing network of choice. Why did she have to go on and on about Alexander McQueen’s suicide while I was trying to enjoy Kate’s dress?
And about Kate’s dress (I realize she’s Duchess Catherine now, but she’ll always be Kate to me), it was perfection. Elegant and beautiful and simple. She looked just like a fairy princess bride should look. Cinderella wishes she looked that good on her wedding day.
I watched the double kiss at Buckingham Palace and the flyover and then watched while the networks all rehashed the entire thing and brought in lip-readers to translate what everyone was saying and speculated about when they would have little royal children.
Then (I can’t believe I’m about to publicly admit this. I almost feel like I need to apologize to someone.) I watched the replay of the original William and Kate movie on Lifetime. It was truly horrible in the delightful way that can only be achieved by Lifetime movies and I adored every minute of it. Although P stopped by the house at one point and I immediately changed the channel because I was so embarrassed to be watching it. I’m not really sure why considering I was still watching Beverly Hills 90210 when we got married back in 1997. And I’ll still watch it today if I catch a good rerun. P didn’t marry me for my intellectual television taste.
But those who watch Uncle Ted’s Spirit of the Wild cannot throw stones at my glass television house.
In other non-royal news from the weekend, Saturday morning was a big day. Caroline’s soccer team, the team formerly known as The Cheetah Girls and now known as The Magic or TTFKATCG if you want to be cool like Prince, beat their arch-rivals, The Dragons. And I may have been the slightly obnoxious soccer mom cheering in the stands because it was her last game of the season and I really wanted them to win. Afterwards we celebrated with an end of the year party and the girls all ate grilled sausage on a stick while they soaked in the hot tub. Because what says VICTORY like sausage on a stick being gnawed on by a bunch of girls with half their teeth missing?
Which, by the way, our missing teeth situation escalated on Sunday morning when another one of Caroline’s teeth fell out while she was eating a chocolate donut after church. Her mouth now looks like a jigsaw puzzle. A very cute puzzle, but a puzzle nonetheless. I will also never recover from the moment she said, “MAMA! My tooth just came out in my donut!” and I said, “Spit it out!” while I held out my hand, totally not realizing I was about to end up with a hand full of chewed up donut.
I’d like to say it was a rookie mistake, but I’ve done this long enough to know better.
And now I’ve written this entire post and they just announced that Usama Bin Laden has been killed. That’s probably more important than the Royal Wedding.
But the clothes aren’t as pretty.