Big Mama Blog

Tremendous mass also refers to how much cookie dough I ate this weekend

Friday morning, P and I went to the doctor so that they could look at his incision and make sure everything was okay. The recovery from this surgery hasn’t been nearly as easy as his previous recoveries, so I’ve been a little concerned.

We met with the nurse and she told us that everything he’s experiencing is normal. In fact, she said every day the herniated disc was putting pressure on his nerve equals a week of recovery. So, good news! Recovery should only last about 33 weeks, which is about the same amount of time it takes me to balance our checkbook.

She also read the doctor’s report from P’s surgery. She said (and I quote) “Patient had a tremendous mass of spinal material removed”. I’m no medical expert, but I feel fairly certain that the words TREMENDOUS MASS in reference to any medical condition are just not good. Like P said, “If they removed a tremendous mass, how much do I have left?”

So, after having the fear of God and spinal fusion drilled into us, we left the office and headed home. The good news is I get to keep putting P’s socks and shoes on him for at least the next month and, fingers crossed, I may get to cut his toenails.

It’s really everything I imagined as I stood at the altar and pledged to be his for all eternity.

As for the rest of the weekend, my friend Jen came in town for a visit. Friday night, all the girls went out for Mexican food and Jen surprised us by bringing a cake to celebrate all the summer birthdays in the group. We ate huge bowls of guacamole, enjoyed a few margaritas, laughed until we cried and then, the band started up.

Nails scraping on a chalkboard are less annoying than this band. And really, I’m using the term “band” lightly. There were maracas, drums and LOUD, LOUD singing. We were literally screaming at each other and couldn’t hear a word. The final straw was when they sang a cover of “Smooth” that would have made Carlos Santana and Rob Thomas curl up in the fetal position. Needless to say, we asked for the check and got out before our ears started to bleed.

Saturday night we all went over to Gulley’s and ate a spread of food that can only be described as health-free. It was essentially the bizarro equivalent of the Atkins Diet. There wasn’t a protein to be found, not even a summer sausage. We had Mississippi Sin Dip, Fritos, cheese and crackers, chips and salsa, and topped it off with this.


In case y’all can’t tell, that’s a large bowl of chocolate chip cookie dough with four spoons. Otherwise known as magic in a bowl.

I’m not even lying a little when I tell y’all that I finally had to put a piece of gum in my mouth to keep me from eating anymore.

I’m not proud to say that, 5 minutes later, I spit out my gum so that I could have another bite.

And one last note from the weekend. Look who learned to ride her bicycle.


She’s getting so big.

I wonder if I can teach her how to cut P’s toenails.

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Theology from a 4 year old

This morning at our house.

“Caroline, it’s time to get ready for church.”

“I don’t want to go to church. I want to stay home.”

“No, we’re going to church.”

“Why? Why do we always have to go to church?”

“Well, so we can learn about Jesus.”

“Yeah, I already know about him. I don’t need to go.”

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The big boo cast, episode one

Well, here it is.

And let me say that I owe a huge thank you to Boomama who tirelessly worked on making this whole thing possible. Essentially, my only contribution, other than wearing headphones and speaking into a microphone, was to push back my cuticles and eat chocolate cake, while I called her every few hours to sympathize about how frustrating the internet can be.

Y’all can see that our Saturdays have been equally as stressful.

Anyway, hope y’all enjoy.


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A year ago I thought “podcast” was just a term from a sci-fi movie

Some of y’all may have already heard that Boomama and I did a podcast last night. We will both post it sometime this weekend for your listening enjoyment. Or, you know, if you’re bored out of your mind.

It all started about a month ago when we were talking on the phone and agreed we wanted a way to be able to discuss our thoughts on the upcoming Presidential elections, the globalization of the economy, and our top stock picks for 2007.

But then we decided that has all just been done to death and will instead be discussing our thoughts on even deeper issues such as fall trends, drugstore cosmetics, and Paula Deen.

We are deeply introspective and these are the things that are keeping us up at night.

And y’all will see from the podcast that we agree on so many of these issues, it’s like we share one mind.

Along with our ability to discuss absolutely nothing in great detail, we’ll also reveal our real names because, at some point, you just start to feel a little silly being referred to as Boomama or Big Mama. I’ve always said that if I had known more than 2 people would read this blog, I probably would have rethought the whole Big Mama thing. I can’t tell y’all the number of Google searches I have looking for references to a certain movie starring Martin Lawrence.

And really, that’s the mental image I’d like to convey to the internet.

Anyway, I hope y’all think it’s fun. We had a great time with it, although I’m a little afraid that I had a tendency to try to muffle my laughter which may make me sound a little like Beavis and Butthead. Just know that in real life I normally don’t sound like a cartoon character with bad acne.

That is all.

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A truly great clip

Caroline had her first real trip to the beauty shop just a little while ago.? In the past, we have always gone to Great Clips (total oxymoron, by the way), but last time the “stylist” felt the need to cut Caroline’s bangs to the point where they started in the middle of her head.? I knew walking out of there that we wouldn’t be back.

You can’t mess around with a girl’s crowning glory.? We needed a real beautician technician.

I booked Caroline an appointment at the real live beauty shop and today was the day.? The stylist helped me confirm my decision that it’s time to let Caroline’s bangs grow out.? So, God have mercy on my soul, we are entering into a new season of barrettes to hold back the growing out bangs.

But when we left today, Caroline had the beauty shop equivalent of the holy trinity:? layers, style, and some new sparkly accessories for her crocs.



Great Clips is dead to her.

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