Month: June 2010

  • The lazy days of summer

    On Monday morning I felt like we officially slipped into summer mode. Caroline had only been out of school two days when we left for our vacation to Florida, then we started Vacation Bible School the next week, and followed that up with a week of soccer camp. We have been very busy having all the fun, but at some point last week I realized that we needed to slow it down a notch or there was a good chance I’d end the summer either A) Flat Broke B) Checked in to some kind of mental institution or C) Both of the above.

    We do not have one single commitment over the next two weeks unless you count eating a lot of hot dogs to celebrate the Fourth of July. But I don’t really consider that a commitment as much as our obligation to perpetuate the American Dream, assuming that dream is potential health problems from eating too much processed meat cooked over carcinogenics washed down with a slice of apple pie.

    The point is we ate dinner with some friends on Sunday night and stayed out late because we could. (I’m sad that my definition of late is 10:30, but I need to own my lameness.) And then, GLORY HALLELUJAH, Caroline slept in until 9:55 a.m. on Monday morning. When she finally woke up I hugged her to me and whispered, “I have never loved you more than I do right now.” because 9:55 a.m.? It surpassed all my hopes and expectations for Summer 2010.

    Then yesterday morning she slept in again. Granted, it was merely 9:00 a.m. but it was enough to make me wish I could travel back in time to visit myself circa August 2003 and let me know there was hope for the future.

    Anyway, after we woke up I called my friend Julie and told her we were ready for her to drop S off at our house. Julie is in the process of moving to a new house (and hopefully getting a DVR) and Gulley offered to take her boys for the day and I’d told her we could keep her daughter, S, who is one of Caroline’s best friends.

    Gulley and I decided it would be a brilliant idea to just take all the kids to the pool because how hard could it be for the two of us to watch six kids? As it turns out, on the scale of difficulty it ranks somewhere between reasoning with an inebriated goat and fitting into your skinny jeans during a certain time of the month.

    Oh I kid.

    They were delightful. Look at the sweet angels sent straight from heaven.

    (Whose kid is the camera hog in the polka dot swimsuit?)

    I took that picture right after we finally got them all sunscreened up and ready to swim, only to have the lifeguards blow their whistle announcing ten minutes of Adult Swim. So they all sat there patiently and only asked “How much longer?” sixteen or eighty-four times until the whistle finally blew again to signal Adult Swim was over.

    And about five minutes later the sky opened up, the whistle blew again and we ran for cover as the rain began to pour. Well, Gulley and I ran for cover. The rest of our group embraced the rain and stayed out in it the whole time.

    After a few rain dances and a round of ice cream, the rain stopped and we all swam for the next few hours. The original plan was to eat dinner at the pool, but S and Caroline voted to go back to my house and order Papa John’s Pizza instead. So we did.

    And then I spent the next few hours giving multiple pedicures the same sets of fingers and toes because “Oh, I wanted polka dot toes!” and “Oh! I didn’t know we had PURPLE POLISH! I want the PURPLE POLISH!” and “Oh man! I just messed mine all up. Can you redo them?”

    All I know is that all this summer relaxation is about to wear me out.

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  • Birthday club

    Five years ago, Gulley had a three-year-old little boy and a four-month-old baby and was about to celebrate her thirty-third birthday. Although I use the term “celebrate” loosely because I don’t know how much celebrating anyone does when you have a toddler and a newborn in the house. Crying? Yes. Celebrating? Not unless the grandparents show up and offer to stay for the weekend.

    I decided that what she really needed for her birthday was a girls’ night out and so set about making plans to get a group of her girlfriends together to go out for Mexican food. Honestly, I didn’t even know most of the other girls at all except in passing because they were friends she’d met through someone other than me. (That’s kind of the way our friendship has worked for the last twenty years; Gulley is the more outgoing one and so she’s in charge of making all the new friends and then I just take them on as my friends. It’s a process that has worked beautifully.)

    But we all had such a great time at dinner that someone suggested we should go out once a month. And so we have for the last five years. We call ourselves Birthday Club because our original intent was to celebrate each member’s birthday. Our husbands like to point out that there are only six of us and yet we have a birthday to celebrate twelve months out of the year. To which we respond “YOU’LL BE QUIET AND QUIT QUESTIONING THE MATH IF YOU KNOW WHAT’S GOOD FOR YOU” as we walk out the door to go eat chips and queso.

    What I love the most is that we never really schedule our dinners. We just know at some point in the month someone will email everyone else and say, “I’M ABOUT TO LOSE MY MIND IF I DON’T GET OUT OF THIS HOUSE FOR AN EVENING” and we’ll all check our calendars until we find the closest night that works for everyone.

    (Apparently Birthday Club uses ALL CAPS in my mind. If you could hear how loud we are when we get together you’d understand.)

    At our dinner in May we realized we were about to celebrate our five year anniversary and all agreed we wanted to do something fun to commemorate all that we’ve been through together. Over the last five years we’ve gone from six kids between us to having six more, we’ve survived house remodels, miscarriages, and deaths of loved ones. We’ve discussed everything from our thoughts on Matt Lauer to the Real Housewives to the trials of potty-training to struggles with postpartum depression.

    Basically, we’ve covered it all.

    So this past Friday we checked into two rooms at the Westin La Cantera Resort to celebrate five years of friendship. And, let me tell you, by the time I arrived I was in desperate need of some girl time. Caroline has mastered the art of guilt and told me before I left that she wanted to watch me walk away because it was “the last time I’ll see you walking before tomorrow” and “it seems like you would want to come home to your child”. It was slightly dramatic considering that I’d be gone less than 18 hours and she was spending the night with Mimi and Bops which is the equivalent of being at a theme park with a full-service wait staff who serve rootbeer floats at regular intervals.

    Anyway, we arrived at the hotel and it took us approximately 4.3 seconds to change into our bathing suits and head down to the adults-only pool armed with sunscreen, big floppy hats and a few copies of People and InStyle magazine. As it turned out, we didn’t need the magazines because we never quit talking while we sat piled together on six lounge chairs looking out at the incredible view of the Texas Hill Country.

    Later on we ate dinner and then headed back to our rooms where we had an in-depth discussion about all the ways we do not understand what the kids are listening to on the radio these days. Who is Ke$ha with a dollar sign? Where did Justin Beiber come from and why can’t we get his song out of our head? What does it say about us that we can look through a People magazine and not know who half the people are or why they are famous for this particular fifteen minutes?

    Then our friend Julie revealed that she doesn’t own a DVR which caused us all to have a few moments of silence as we pondered what our own lives would look like without it. To make matters worse, she asked, “Is that the thing that lets you rewind shows while you’re watching them?”

    Listen, we are all praying for her.

    After staying up laughing and talking way too late, Steph woke us up the next morning after she returned from her morning workout (we’re praying for her, too) and we all went down to eat breakfast. Which is where this unfortunate picture was taken.

    I don’t know why Tweety Bird chose to come over to our table since, clearly, we were child-free and there were plenty of other surrounding tables with children just dying to get in on some Tweety Bird photo action. Yet Tweety kept loitering by our table and waving awkwardly until our friend Amy finally pulled out her camera and took a picture of Gulley and me with Tweety just to appease him. And after all that, poor Tweety misjudged the direction of his eyes and posed looking in the wrong direction. Also, is it just me or does that waiter in the background look like he’s in the midst of some deep thoughts? Maybe he was wondering why a table full of grown women wanted a picture with Tweety Bird.

    Sadly, I only got about another hour by the pool before it was time to go home to my child and chauffeur her to 164 different birthday parties on Saturday afternoon. But it was so much fun while it lasted.

    Now we’re just trying to figure out how we can upgrade our monthly dinners to a monthly sleepover at a nice hotel. Something tells me that’s going to be a hard sell, but we may be able to provide a convincing argument if we put together a budget chart showing how much money we’ve saved each other in professional therapy bills.

    When you look at it that way, the hotel room essentially pays for itself.

  • I feel like I should apologize for the photo quality

    If the sign of a good time is how many wardrobe changes you have in a twelve hour time period, then someone had a very, very good weekend.

    (Listen, I don’t know how I managed to completely cut her head off in this picture. I’m a horrible, horrible photographer)

    Let us not speak of the laundry.

  • Fashion Friday: All I planned to do was post one picture

    Caroline is a big fan of all manner of accessories.

    Even if they happen to be 3-D glasses.

    I hadn’t planned on doing a Fashion Friday post, but I couldn’t help myself. Please note that I was way too lazy to actually post pictures this time. I apologize profusely.

    1. Fossil Crystal Watch

    Love the turquoise color of this watch. And it’s on sale.

    2. Embroidered Kurta Tunic

    Words can’t describe how much I adore this tunic. The yellow color makes me so happy.

    3. Coralie Cami

    I saw this in J.Crew yesterday and thought it was a cute summer top.

    4. La Blanca Splash Bandini

    A reader named Lara sent me the link to this swimsuit. I love it.

    5. Blue Howlite Multi-Strand Necklace

    Have I mentioned I like turquoise?

    6. Nine West Euliane Wedge

    I’ve been wanting some nude-colored wedge sandals and really like these because I could wear them with a lot of different things.

    7. Stone Bib Necklace

    Love the colors in this necklace. Very summery.

    8. Muse Chain Strap Matte Jersey Shift Dress

    On the season finale of Tori and Dean, Tori wore this unbelievably gorgeous one-shouldered caftan after their vow renewal ceremony. I desperately tried to find a good picture of it, but failed. I’m sure it was vintage something or other and cost at least $35.

    And I’m not sure how any of that relates to this jersey shift dress at all, but I just wanted to tell you about my love for the caftan.

    9. Crochet Trim Swing Skirts

    You know how I love a summer skirt.

    10. Gingham Red Coral Shirt

    I can’t really explain why I love this gingham shirt so much. The heart wants what it wants.

    Plus, I can just picture it with a turquoise necklace and some boots. And probably some pants of some kind would be a nice touch, too.

    Y’all have a great Friday.

  • Pool towel bingo

    The air-conditioning is working again.

    I repeat, the air-conditioning is working.

    The guy showed up around noon yesterday to install the new motor. He also checked out our other unit to make sure it wasn’t circling the drain and said everything looked good. Then, on the way out the door, he said, “Just make sure you call us this winter before you turn on your heat. Your unit is over seven years old and that’s around the time it can crack and cause carbon monoxide to leak throughout your home and you’ll go to bed one night and never wake up.”

    Wow. I was not expecting that.

    Needless to say, all my neurotic tendencies kicked in and I turned to November 1st in my planner and penciled in, “Call to get heat checked so we don’t all die”. You have to admit he knew his audience.

    Anyway, I’m feeling much better today and not just because it no longer feels like I’m sitting on the equator. Gulley knew I needed a little time to myself (mainly because I might have called her crying yesterday and said, “I just need a few hours to myself.”) and offered to pick up Caroline from soccer camp and let her play with Jackson and Will for a little while.

    I felt so bad saying I needed a little time to myself but ever since summer began Caroline has been in love with me. She wants to be everywhere I am and there is no such thing as personal space. And while I am so thankful and love her more than life itself, we’ve been inseparable for the better part of a month and the introvert who lives inside me just needed a little time to breathe. (Yes, I am a little bit of an introvert. I just play an extrovert on the internet.)

    Later on in the afternoon, I met Gulley and the kids at the pool. We swam and watched the kids jump off the diving board and caught up on important current events like General McChrystal’s resignation, the earthquake in Canada, why the local sportscasters only talk about the Spurs and not the College World Series, and which bachelor we think Ali should choose. (Chris L. is the frontrunner with Roberto at a distant second.)

    After we were worn out from swimming, we ate dinner at the pool and while we were finishing up we heard Coach announce that it was time for “almost moonlight bingo”. Listen, we had no idea that it was bingo night at the pool. It was just a gift from God.

    Will was beside himself and immediately yelled “YAHOO BINGO!!” and hit Gulley up for a dollar so he could play. He had his game face on and repeated everything Coach said with great enthusiasm. “I-64!!! G-7!!! N-22!!!”

    Then P got up to go refill his water and Coach saw him walk up and started calling his name over the loudspeaker, “P! COME AND GET YOUR BINGO CARD, P! TIME FOR P TO PLAY A LITTLE BINGO!”

    Caroline thought it was the most hysterical thing she’d ever experienced.

    When Jackson and Caroline saw how much Will was enjoying his game of Bingo they decided to play as well.

    Although they lacked a little of his passion for the game. Ultimately they got up and wandered back off to the pool to swim a little bit more. Then Will decided to follow them.

    So there Gulley and I sat, just the two of us, playing our Bingo cards. She looked at me and said, “I guess this is a glimpse of our future at the retirement community.”

    And then we laughed until we cried.

    It was a good day.

  • Crazy from the heat

    Our air conditioner motor did not show up yesterday because apparently it wasn’t actually in Austin but may have been in Bryan or perhaps the repairman is just taking a hiatus and doesn’t want to work this week. All I know is that I am sick and tired of our living room and kitchen feeling like the equivalent of living on the sun. It’s making me very irritable. So I spent most of yesterday in a bad mood that I’m going to blame on a dangerous cocktail of no air-conditioning and hormones. Ladies, your late thirties do not play around. Honestly, after I snapped at no less than three people by 9:30 a.m., I felt like I should quarantine myself. Preferably at a day spa where they serve wine all day.

    Instead, I dropped Caroline off at soccer camp by 9:00 a.m. and then headed back home to spend a little bit of time catching up on my correspondence. In other words, I read blogs and Twitter and Facebook updates. In that time I discovered that Jake and Vienna have broken up which makes me so sad because what is the world coming to when fake publicity stunt relationships don’t last forever? It’s like all those helicopter rides and bungee-jumping dates don’t prepare people for the daily struggles involved when two people try to share their lives.

    After I felt like I’d gotten a good grasp of current events, I drove over to Everything But Water to look at swimsuits. And there really isn’t anything else to say about that but BLARGH. The salesgirl sweetly asked me if I’d found anything as I walked toward the door empty handed and I explained they really didn’t have anything that would work for me. She insisted, “But we have so much cute stuff!” Yes, if I were seventeen years old and a size 00, they had some darling things. As soon as I step into some alternate universe that turns back the hands of time, I’ll go back and try again.

    Sufficiently deflated and foul from the swimsuit experience, I journeyed to Target to pick up a few things. I bought a ten pack of paper towels, some Triscuits, dental floss, self-tanner, and five cans of antiperspirant for P because I know his love language is bulk purchases.

    (I don’t know why I just shared what I bought at Target. It’s a new low.)

    I picked up Caroline from soccer camp and we came home to eat lunch and huddle in the bedroom in search of cold air. Finally, around two o’ clock it was time for us to head to the theater to see Toy Story 3.

    Yes, I cried. I’m not made of stone.

    (Also, see mention of hormonal issues in the first paragraph.)

    After the movie was over, Caroline tried to convince me that we should go to the pool and eat dinner. I said no because I still haven’t recovered from the mediocre nachos I ate there the day before and also because I just wanted to get home and get us settled in for the evening. This decision did not help me win friends and influence people, especially my daughter who declared, “BUT MAMA, IT’S TEN TIMES WORSER AT HOME WITHOUT ANY AIR-CONDITIONER”.

    Which actually isn’t correct because it’s at least SEVENTY TIMES WORSER.

    Last night I made chalupas in honor of the new kitchen color and also because the only thing I happened to have on hand were some corn tortillas, beans and cheese. For dessert I made homemade vanilla ice cream using the vanilla extract I bought in the Dominican Republic two and a half years ago, which makes everything extra delicious. I’m sad to report that I have approximately one teaspoon left in the bottle and then I’ll have to say goodbye to extra tasty baked goods until the next time I can visit the Dominican or bribe someone to bring me back a bottle.

    The bottom line is we sat in the un-airconditioned living room last night and ate chalupas with a side of guacamole. Between the heat and the food and the bright turquoise kitchen it was just like being in Mexico. All we were missing was someone trying to sell us Chiclets while a mariachi band played and a burro walked through the kitchen for no apparent reason other than lax health code standards.