We had so much fun this weekend. Honestly, I don’t even know where to start.
But, if I don’t start somewhere then I’ll just sit here like I’ve been sitting here for the last 2 hours, procrastinating, because I don’t even know how to tell y’all about the weekend.
I think for lack of a better format, I’m going to tell y’all about the weekend in chronological order. Be prepared, it may be a two-parter.
Gulley and I left town at 2 p.m. sharp. We had spent the last week hoping and praying that no one would get sick, and as soon as we checked one last time for fever or illness, we were outta here.
I hate to confess this but I may have burned rubber pulling out of her driveway.
We stopped in San Marcos because I hadn’t eaten lunch and was in need of a little nourishment. So, we pulled through DQ and ordered some fries and Diet Cokes. I handed the girl a fifty dollar bill and she gave me back $4.00 in change.
I do love some fries but $46.00 seemed a little steep.
I told her I had given her $50.00 and she mumbled incoherently as she counted out my real change. Then, as a bonus, she spilled a LARGE Diet Coke all over the side of my car.
Good times.
And not messy at all.
She was fortunate that nothing was going to steal my joy.
We drove on and finally arrived in Bryan. I can’t even explain how long it took for me to unload my clothes out of the car because I realize I have a problem. I don’t need it confirmed here on the internet. Let’s just say Gulley and I could have been stranded for SEVERAL days, possibly weeks, and never had to wear the same thing twice.
I lack what some may call decision-making skills.
We walked into Gulley’s mama’s house and, much to my delight, Nena was there. She wanted to come, watch us get ready and dole out her fashion advice. But since it wasn’t quite time to get ready, we sat and visited for a while.
Nena told us all about this story she had seen on the news about some woman who survived out at sea for NINETEEN DAYS. It seems this woman remembered that most of your body heat escapes from your head so she had tied her bikini top around her head to try to maintain some body heat.
Nena went on and on about this woman surviving NINETEEN DAYS with just her bikini top tied around her head, and finally Big said, “Wow. Nineteen days? That’s incredible. Are you sure?”
And Nena said, “Well, maybe it was just nineteen hours.”
Yes, that would seem more likely.
She also told us a story about a friend of hers that has always been SO BEAUTIFUL. She said, “She was SO BEAUTIFUL that men turned their heads to watch her walk down the street …IN DALLAS.”
It’s no small feat to turn the heads of big city men. That takes some doin’.
We finally started getting ready. And oh what joy to get ready from beginning to end with no interruptions. I didn’t have to stop to wipe anyone’s bottom or open a cheese stick or stick a straw in a juice box. I just curled my hair and listened to the soothing sound of the sizzle that let me know it was going to be a good hair night.
Gulley decided to wear a strapless dress and, once Nena realized this, it became imperative that she wear a “stole” with it. Nena even offered to go home and get her stole so that Gulley could borrow it. I think the very idea that Gulley was going to expose her bare shoulders at Briarcrest Country Club was enough to make Nena reach for her smelling salts.
Gulley told her I had brought a stole for her to wear and she would be properly covered. Nena grabbed me on our way out the door and said, “Make SURE that stole gets worn” as if the very reputation of their family depended on it.
Needless to say, the stole did not get worn.
And I’m only sharing this information because Nena doesn’t have a computer. As Gulley would say, “No one wants to be Nena’s I.T. person.”
Talk about a full-time job.
The next morning Nena called Gulley’s mama to get the report on our evening and the first question she asked was, “Did anyone else have on a strapless dress?” I told her they did and none of them were wearing stoles.
Horrified doesn’t even begin to cover her reaction. You would have thought I told her these girls took off their shoes and ate with their feet.
Anyway, we had a great time Friday night. We saw friends we hadn’t seen in years and got caught up on what everyone has been doing for the last 15 years. I also saw several scrapbooks that contained photos of me with hair that was not a color found in nature and so large it didn’t fit in the picture.
And, I’m embarrassed to admit this, but in one of them I was wearing WHITE hose with FUSCHIA flats and a FUSCHIA dress with a white bow across the top that was bigger than my head.
Which is saying something.
I’m not going to lie, it wasn’t pretty.
And not even a stole would have helped. Unless maybe I wrapped it around my head.
Like that girl did with her bikini top for 19 days at sea.
I’ll be back tomorrow with more reports from the weekend. And pictures!