Have I mentioned I’ve had the flu?
I couldn’t really remember until I looked at my last 15 posts that seem to ramble endlessly about my ill health, so I’m putting you out of your misery and talking about something else.
Gulley and I usually go to Starbucks every Monday morning after we drop the kids off at school. Neither one of us have ever been serious coffee drinkers, although Gulley did date a boy named Juan Valdez in college.
That isn’t true at all, but it just made me laugh so I’m leaving it there.
Anyway, on cold mornings we like a little pick me up in the form of liquid caffeine, and more importantly, to catch up on the events of the previous weekend.
A few weeks ago, we walked into Starbucks and I ordered my favorite holiday drink, a Grande, Non-fat Peppermint Mocha with no whip.
I’m embarrassed to say that I feel a sense of pride in having mastered the Starbucks terminology, although I’m sure they are still secretly laughing about the amateurish nature of my order.
It lacks a certain sophistication and discriminating coffee drinker’s palette.
Oh, and on a completely different note I once worked for a man that thought it was hysterical to go to Starbucks, walk up to the counter and just tell them he wanted “whatever tastes the most like Folgers”.
I’m pretty sure they spit in his coffee when he wasn’t looking.
Anyway, Gulley followed behind me and ordered her standard drink, a Grande Caramel Macchiato.
As they handed us our drinks, Gulley wondered aloud about the calorie count of her drink and if she wasn’t inadvertently consuming more calories than she realized.
In a fit of coffee legalism and judgement, I said, “Well, actually, I didn’t want to say anything before but a Caramel Macchiato is pretty much THE WORST thing you can order.”
“Really?”
“Oh yeah. If you look at Starbucks.com at the nutritional value, it has, like, the highest calorie count of ALL the drinks.”
Well, let me tell y’all, do not point out the Caramel Macchiato in your friend’s eye, when you have a Peppermint Mocha in your own.
I went to Starbucks.com to check it out for myself.
And yeah, the Peppermint Mocha is pretty much the worst thing you can order.
Thank you. Thank you very much.