Okay, so I can’t stay away. I thought I could step away for a few days but, apparently, I HAVE AN ADDICTION, SIR.
On Friday night we took Caroline down to the FAMOUS San Antonio Riverwalk to walk amongst the Christmas lights. What we did not factor in was the amount of traffic downtown due to the state 5A finals and, oh yeah, CHRISTMAS.
We ate dinner and then attempted to drive closer to the river to find a place to park. P was driving and Bops was in the backseat with Mimi and Caroline. The traffic was backed up for what seemed like miles and we kept watching the light change from green back to red while we never moved an inch.
I believe it’s what the big city folk call gridlock.
We could see that people kept pulling up and blocking the intersection, thereby inhibiting our traffic progress. Bops, in a fit of Christmas cheer and goodwill toward men, said, “They ought to have policeman in these intersections with sticks of dynamite. If there’s a car in the middle of the intersection after the light’s changed, they should just blow it up. Tell the driver they have 10 seconds to get out, but the car is history.”
If any of y’all thought that he was going to say perhaps the policemen should just hand out tickets, as opposed to sticks of dynamite, you’re not alone.
We finally made our way to a parking garage where we watched the attendant let the car ahead of us in and then, very rudely, tell us it was full. For about five seconds I thought Caroline was about to learn some new colorful descriptions, courtesy of Bops and P, but they both caught themselves in time.
That would have been the Christmas gift that keeps on giving.
Caroline was equally frustrated with the traffic and repeatedly yelled, “GO GRANDMA!! JUST GO!!”
I have no idea where she learned that.
Road rage is part of our family legacy.
After the futile parking attempt that nearly resulted in Bops getting out of the car to experience Christmas joy in the form of telling off a parking attendant, we found a place and headed down to the river. It was totally worth it even though Caroline’s goal for the evening was to give me a heart attack by seeing how close she could get to the water while looking up at the lights.
Because here’s something I’d never noticed about the Riverwalk before, there is nothing separating the water from the walkways. You’re just one or six margaritas away from just falling on in, depending on your alcohol tolerance. I have no doubt this is a strategic move on the part of the city because it’s a $250 fine if you fall in.
Bars serving alcohol + Narrow walkways + River = SERIOUS COIN for the city
I spent the rest of the weekend in a cooking frenzy. For the first time ever, I am cooking the entire holiday meal. I am so excited to use my china that I actually went ahead and set the table.
Look! Christmas plates that have never seen the light of day until now.
I also made my famous eggnog, complete with the most essential item for a stress-free Christmas.
Oh I kid. We all know that’s not enough bourbon to make Christmas stress-free.
Especially not if you’re heading down to the Riverwalk to look at the lights.