Yesterday my day started at 7 a.m. when I woke up to find Caroline staring right at me asking me to tell her the story of the time I was a little girl and got stung by a wasp. That’s really all there is to the story, but ever since I told it to her about a week ago she has begged me to tell it over and over again. She is obsessed with my lame wasp story.
And honestly, if I had known I’d be asked to tell it so many times I would have exaggerated some details for dramatic effect.
Anyway, I gave her a very groggy rendition of the wasp story and then she asked me to tell her another story about when I was a little girl. So I told her about the time when I was a little girl and I’d ride my bike all the time.
“Is that it?”
Sadly, yes. That is it. Mama does not function well before 9 a.m. and that’s the best I’ve got.
And that pretty much sums up the rest of my day, which is why this post is just a list of random information.
1. I would like to assure all of y’all that Barbie Island Princess was not harmed in the making of the float. Yes, she has a little glue residue on her backside, but that’s not any worse than any former Miss USA contestant.
How do you think those swimsuit bottoms stay perfectly in place? A miracle?
It’s a miracle alright. A little miracle called spray-on glue.
Barbie has been returned to her rightful place in a plastic pink bin in the playroom. Her fifteen minutes of parade float fame are up.
2. Speaking of fifteen minutes of fame, I am so excited about American Idol tonight. It’s the American Idol that I’ve been waiting for all season.
Why? Why all the anticipation?
Two words.
NEIL DIAMOND.
He sings a little song called “Sweet Caroline”. Ever heard of it?
Last week I told Gulley that I would actually call in and vote for whoever sings “Sweet Caroline” and maybe even whoever sings “Forever in Blue Jeans”.
God has smiled on me because Jason Castro is singing “Sweet Caroline”. So I can vote for the Aggie and the song that has meant so much to me over the years.
Sadly, no one is singing “Forever in Blue Jeans”.
I do not understand this.
If I am ever given the chance to get up on stage and sing, “Forever in Blue Jeans” would be on the short list of songs I’d perform. Along with Amy Grant’s “Open Arms” because I sang it as a duet in 8th grade and totally brought the audience in the school cafeteria to its knees.
Or maybe just my parents told me I did a good job.
Same thing.
3. Gulley and I had a great guy friend in college named Trevor. One night he was over at our house kind of late and we made a convenience store run for groceries courtesy of my daddy’s Chevron card. I don’t remember everything we bought but I do remember that one item was an excessively large bag of Nacho Cheese Doritos.
I must have been scarfing them down in a very delicate manner because all of a sudden Trevor said, “Hey Mel, why don’t you give those Doritos a fighting chance?”
I bring this up because I am currently suffering from some serious hormonal imbalance that’s causing me to not give the bowl of M&M’s sitting next to me a fighting chance.
And, by the way, Trevor ended up marrying one of our very best friends. That has nothing to do with this story but it has provided my life with some nice symmetry.
Y’all have a good day.
Oh! I thought of one more thing. This week Fashion Friday is going to be about swimsuits.
Get fired up.