I’ve been sitting here for an hour trying to figure out how to recap the weekend because it’s just too much. It was all too much. In a span of forty-eight hours I have laughed, cried, and laughed until I cried. I have eaten more than my share of Memphis barbecue and, in a moment of Mexican food desperation, some Taco Bell.
Blame it on my sophisticated palate and general sense of food elitism, but there are times when nothing tastes better than some crispy tacos from Taco Bell covered in their mild taco sauce that will take the tarnish off a penny. I know that to be true because we never grew tired of that particular experiment in college. If only my 2 a.m. passionate interest in the chemistry of taco sauce had translated to any of my college courses.
The deliciousness of the Taco Bell caused me to reflect on other fast foods that have ministered to me at various times in my life and here’s my list.
(I know you are FASCINATED)
1. Whataburger cheeseburgers with extra mustard – This is the only food that got me through my pregnancy with Caroline. The first three months were so miserable and only the Whataburger had the power to cure my morning sickness. I’d eat my first one at 10:00 a.m. every morning and, on particularly bad days, be back for another one by mid-afternoon.
You know what’s sad? When the Whataburger drive-thru staff knows you well enough to comment on your pregnancy and is excited to find out you’re having a girl.
2. McDonalds Big Macs – I know. Disgusting. I loved them throughout high school. And, really, there’s nothing cuter than a teenage girl in her dance team uniform eating two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions on a sesame seed bun.
(I can remember that jingle but I can’t remember that Caroline has the day off school tomorrow even though it’s written in all caps on my calendar CAROLINE OUT OF SCHOOL)
3. Sonic tater tots and a corn dog – If loving the tots is wrong, then I don’t want to be right.
4. Popeyes spicy chicken two piece dinner – There was a delightful period of time in my early 20’s when I’d just graduated from college and found myself living in San Antonio where I didn’t know a soul and spent my work week dispensing sub-par financial advice to people who should have known better than to listen to me. On Sunday mornings after church I’d stop by the grocery store to buy the Sunday edition of The Houston Chronicle, swing by Popeyes to pick up the two-piece dinner and then go back to my little apartment and eat chicken while I read all the beautiful wedding announcements in the Lifestyle section. And may have occasionally cried and felt a little sorry for myself because I was twenty-three and clearly on my way to being a spinster destined to eat fried chicken alone forever.
Listen. I’m not proud.
5. Chick-fil-A nuggets – There is no star that shines as bright in the fast food world as some Chick-fil-A nuggets. The sad thing is that Caroline doesn’t care for Chick-fil-A.
I KNOW.
Where have I gone wrong? I keep trying to convince her it’s delicious, but she’s not buying it. She’d rather have a Whataburger cheeseburger, so basically her taste buds in utero are the same now that she’s six. It’s unfortunate since I can only tolerate a Whataburger cheeseburger every now and then since I ate my lifetime allotment in a nine month period of time.
I’d love to know that we are all united in our love of at least some sort of fast food. Please tell me your fast food weaknesses, both past and present, so I don’t feel alone in my confession of years of Big Mac consumption.
(Also, I realize this post in no way really recapped the weekend because it is what I like to call a cop out post. I have too many details that I’m still processing and am in desperate need of sleep. And maybe a Whataburger cheeseburger.)
(Not because I’m pregnant, just because I wanted to bring it all back around. Just wanted to clarify.)