You can’t fake this kind of crazy

I am not going to even attempt to do a weekly recap of The Bachelor because 1. it’s a lot of pressure and 2. there is no way that I will do it as well as Lincee. However, after viewing last night’s episode, I am compelled to make a few quick observations.

1. I’m telling y’all that ABC has bussed in a whole truckload of crazy this time. The execs must be beside themselves with excitement that Prince Lo Bo is a poor enough judge of character to keep Erica. She can’t possibly be a real person, can she?

2. Did y’all see Lisa when Lo Bo talked about people who put love on some kind of time plan? I promise that her left eye started to twitch. Gulley’s Uncle Glen always says that you can tell someone is crazy if you can see the top and bottom of the whites of their eyes (i.e. the Runaway Bride from Georgia) and she certainly had a lot of white showing tonight. I’m afraid we might see Lisa go not a little bit nuts if her 5 year plan to marriage and babyville is thwarted. Hell hath no fury like a woman with a china pattern picked out by her first date.

3. I have had periods of my life where I have been known to be a little overserved, but never to the point of speaking a foreign language. Kim gets the award for “I Blew My Chance To Marry a Fake Prince on National T.V.” I’m willing to bet she was “sweating beads” again tonight while she watched with friends and family.

4. One of my top 5 favorite remarks of the night came from Desiree (yeah, baby) who in her words “has been single for a long time”. She’s 22. She could have never had a boyfriend in her life and not qualify for “single for a long time” status.

Thank you ABC for a classic night of television.