Year: 2006

  • I will not forget you

    A couple of weeks ago, I wrote about trusting the “horses and chariots” in my life instead of looking to God and His wisdom. At the time I was in the middle of huge changes at work and was completely stressed out. I managed to convince myself in a matter of 24 hours that I was going to be without a job.

    I’ve mentioned that I work at a “bank”. The “bank” is undergoing huge structural changes and there had been much talk of reassignments, which basically is their way of saying “Yes you still have a job, we have a nice place for you in South Dakota”. Um, yeah we aren’t moving to South Dakota, therefore I would be jobless. (Not that there’s anything wrong with South Dakota, I’m sure it’s a perfectly lovely place)

    So I was already stressed about the whole situation when my supervisor contacted me to let me know that we would be spending the next few days together. Needless to say, in my mind I began packing my bags for South Dakota. I stressed, I cried, I ate lots of chocolate and strategized how I was going to handle everything, and then I felt extremely convicted and wrote the post about trusting God. More importantly, I didn’t just write a post about it, but I truly trusted God with the matter.

    I won’t bore y’all with all the boring details, but needless to say like most things in our lives, I had blown this way out of proportion. Everything not only was fine, but I have ended up with a new assignment that is better than anything I could have dreamed. So, imagine that. God was actually faithful. In fact, He was more than faithful. True to His word, He did “more than I could ask or imagine”.

    I’m not sure why I was so surprised by the outcome since God has always been so faithful to provide for me. I think somewhere along the way, I lost sight of who He really is and what He has done for me. And for that I am truly sorry.

    “When you have eaten and are satisfied,
    praise the Lord your God
    for the good land he has given you.
    Be careful that you do not forget the Lord your God”
    Deuteronomy 8:10-11
  • Finding Neverland

    Let me start by saying that I never pretend to be all that current. Since having Caroline 3 years ago, I rarely am the first person to see any new movie unless it is something of cinematical greatness and importance such as Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby or The Devil Wears Prada.

    In the same way that I don’t know any songs currently on the top 10 list, y’all can also make a safe bet that I haven’t seen the majority of Oscar nominated movies over the last 3 years.

    Last week, thanks to my new fancy AT&T Dish Network service, I was able to record Finding Neverland. Tonight, I actually watched it and let me say that I loved this movie.

    We watch a lot of Peter Pan in this house because it is Caroline’s all time favorite Disney movie. Who needs Cinderella and Princess Jasmine when you can have Captain Hook, a crocodile, Indians, and Tinkerbell?

    Maybe that’s why I loved Finding Neverland so much, because the story of Peter Pan is so fresh in my mind having watched it 187 times in the last month. All I know is I loved the line when Johnny Depp as J.M. Barrie said, “Little boys should never be put to bed because they’ll wake up in the morning a whole day older”. It reminded me that even days like yesterday go by so fast and she’ll be grown before I blink.

  • Calgon, take me away

    Oh my word have we had a week around here. The whining, the crying, the fit throwing have been legendary and Caroline has been even worse.

    Nothing like combining a long weekend road trip with a sinus infection and lack of sleep to come up with one bad cocktail. Speaking of which, I could really use one.

    Our day started this morning at the most ungodly hour of 5:20 a.m. and I am not kidding when I say that I started crying. Caroline has been such a bear this week that I was hoping for a reprieve until at least 6:30, but no such luck.

    So at 5:30, I put her in my bed and spent the next hour listening to her say that she’s thirsty, she needs Ernie, she needs her blanket. These are all things that she would have had access to had she been in her own bed by the way. Finally at 6:30, I turned on Higglytown Heroes and prayed those little Weeble Wobble wannabes would buy me at least another 30 minutes of sleep. Apparently, I was being a huge optimist.

    I had agreed to keep Gulley’s boys this morning because she had to take her husband to a doctor’s appointment. Of course I had agreed to this last week when my own child was still a delight to be around the majority of the time and I didn’t have a lingering cold. But that Gulley, she is dependable and showed up bearing donuts, homemade chocolate chip cookies and a gift certificate for a pedicure. For that, I would’ve kept her boys for the whole week or well you know, the day.

    Jacks and Will were perfectly pleasant. Will even let me hold him and kiss his little baby fat cheeks which isn’t common for him and just thrilled me.

    About mid-morning, Caroline was in full meltdown mode. I sent her to timeout which then caused Will to start crying and then I looked at Jacks and his lip started to tremble as he said, “I just want to go to my house”. And I wanted to say “Yes, please let’s go to your house and leave this crazed, sleep deprived 3 year old here”.

    But I didn’t because that would be wrong.

    Instead I calmed everybody down and gave them each one of my precious homemade chocolate chip cookies that Gulley brought this morning. I even managed to hold in my rage when I noticed later that one of those cookies had been dropped on the floor with just one bite taken out of it by an unknown perpetrator.

    Hopefully we will all get some much needed rest this weekend and life will return to some semblance of normal. I’m hoping this is just the result of Caroline being a tired, sick little girl and not some new personality that is here to stay. She even told me at one point yesterday, “I don’t want God to live in my heart”. I looked at P and said, “Well, congratulations. We’ve raised a 3 year old blasphemer”.

  • My newest must see T.V.

    Maybe it’s because we both have braces, but I adore Ugly Betty. I think it is one of the best shows on T.V. right now. Any of y’all watching it?

    I knew I loved it before tonight, but good gracious when she walked down the street wearing that butterfly costume and Walter caught her in his net, I knew for sure that this is my new must see T.V.

  • Finallyt, thet sequelt

    Sorry to keep y’all waiting all week long (I know the suspense is killing you), here’s the sequelt to my weekend trip to Beaumont.

    After spending time with the Italian side of the family, Caroline and I went to spend the night at my Nanny’s house. Nanny is my mama’s mama, so she represents a whole different sector of my gene pool.

    Nanny is 88 years old, but y’all would never know it. She has more energy and enthusiasm than people half her age. All of her friends are at least 15-20 years younger than she is because as she will tell you “I don’t like to spend time with old people”. In fact, the week before we arrived she had hosted a Bunco party at her house, you know for all her young friends in their 70’s.

    She has always known how to stay young. I remember being in high school and walking down the street to borrow her clothes and her jewelry. I’m betting that not too many grandmothers have a wardrobe that their granddaughters would like to wear. You don’t see too many 15 year olds wearing SAS shoes with a nice paisley polyester blouse. But Nanny has always had style.

    She was the first person I knew that owned a video camera, a VCR and an answering machine. In fact, my mama said that Nanny called her just the other day and asked “What is an iPod and do I need to get one?” I am sorry, but that is current y’all.

    When we walked through the door, it was all so warm and familiar. I can’t identify what her house smells like, but it’s a part of my life. Even when we got home on Sunday, I could smell it on my clothes and in my hair. It’s just the smell of home and comfort, a combination of Sir Walter Raleigh pipe tobacco, fresh cinnamon cake out of the oven and perfume. If I could buy it in a bottle, I would.

    Caroline was in complete awe of Nanny’s house. There are more things to look at than you could possibly see in just one visit. She still has our old toy closet filled with toys from our childhood and books that bring back so many memories. Caroline walked into that closet, found a huge box full of more jewelry than you can imagine and said “Oh Mama, this is interesting”. It’s like a little piece of heaven on earth for a little girl, and I know because it’s where I spent so much of my childhood.

    At one point, I was on the other side of the house and I heard a familiar noise that made me laugh out loud. It was the sound of Samba music coming from the electric organ that Nanny has in her sitting room. I knew that it was only a matter of time before Caroline discovered it and once she did, she was hooked. I spent a lot of hours playing that same organ with my sister making up variety shows and musicals that would rival the Sweeney Sisters. We’d put Nanny’s nightgowns on our head for our hair and drape ourselves in anything we could find in her jewelry box.

    If you don’t want a honest answer, then you better not ask Nanny a question. Sometimes she’ll even give her opinion before you’ve asked. When she came out of surgery last year, my mama was waiting for her and sat holding her hand. Nanny looked at her and said “I really wish you’d do something with your hair. It just looks terrible”. I have always thought she’s kind of like a mama cat, she likes to take all her babies and get them cleaned up just right. I remember one Thanksgiving when P and I drove 7 hours to get to the lakehouse and when I walked in the door she said “Oh it makes me so sad that you don’t wear makeup anymore”. She feels strongly about looking your best (even on 7 hour car rides), in fact I don’t have a picture of her from this weekend because she didn’t have her “face on”.

    The biggest thing (literally) that she worries about is all of her girls’ weight. Gulley said that she knew she was officially part of the family when Nanny told her she’d put on a few pounds. But here’s the kicker, anytime you visit she will always have your favorite dessert fresh out of the oven. It’s like she wants you to look good, but she also wants to indulge you in your favorite food. In fact, one of the first things she said after I walked in the door was that she had made my favorite banana pudding. It was so good I could’ve eaten the whole bowl. And oh my goodness, her sweet tea is like no other y’all will ever taste. I’d be willing to bet that the sugar to tea ratio errs high on the side of sugar. It’s like heaven in a glass.

    After Caroline finally passed out from the sheer exhaustion of looking through all that jewelry, Nanny and I stayed up talking. This has always been one of my favorite things about Nanny, she’s a night owl like me (or at least like me before I had a 3 year old that likes to wake up when it’s still “darken” outside). When I was little she always let me stay up late with her to watch The Tonight Show, in fact the night that Johnny Carson did his last show I was off at college, but I had to call Nanny on the phone because the sound of Johnny’s voice will always remind me of those renegade nights at her house where I was allowed to stay up until 11:30.

    When we got up to leave the next morning, Caroline wasn’t ready to leave and neither was I. That’s the thing about Nanny, she knows how to make you feel like you’re the most important person in the world when you’re with her. She listens to everything you say and even when I was little, never made me feel like my thoughts didn’t matter. I think Caroline summed it up best as we were leaving, she said “Oh Mama, I want to take one of these road trips again sometime.”

    Mama does too.

  • I’m a hostage in my own home

    I am in day 3 of being under siege. Caroline has been sick and like all good germ carrying monkeys, she has spread her sore throat and congestion to her mama. There is really nothing less fun than being a mama with a cold.

    Remember in the pre-child days when being sick meant getting on the couch with a warm blanket and watching movies all day? Now being sick just means that I have to chase a whining, runny nosed toddler all over the house while my energy level is below half capacity and amazingly in spite of the sickness, she is still running at full steam. She can outwit me, outlast me, and outwhine me.

    In fact, she is so desperate to get us out of the house that she is in her room getting herself dressed. She actually just yelled to me that she needs to put her makeup on and I’m so worn down that all I did was walk in her playroom and open a compact of blue eyeshadow for her. I didn’t even say anything about the fact that she has on two pairs of underwear, a sundress, red sparkly shoes with mismatched socks and has completely soaked her hair down with the no-tangles spray.

    By the end of the day, we’ll probably be eating pixie sticks, drinking coke straight from the bottle and using my good linens as a tent. She has worn me down.

    And did I mention it is pouring down rain so we couldn’t go anywhere even if I was desperate enough to attempt it? I guess I’ll just go ahead and get out my good wedding china for her to play with since it’s only a matter of time at this point anyway.