Another day

Because I know the suspense is killing you, I’ll cut to the chase and let you know that I didn’t dream about Grover Cleveland, or any other Presidents, last night. In fact, I don’t know if I had any dreams at all because I didn’t sleep that great. Mainly because I made the foolish decision to stay up too late watching The Bachelor and was totally freaked out by the entire visit to Shawntel’s hometown. I learned more about funeral homes than I ever wanted to know.

If you’re a single gal with hopes of getting married some day, here’s a tip. Don’t ever utter the phrase, “Do you want to be cremated?” while you’re on a date. It’s a mood killer.

Or maybe it’s just me.

Anyway, my goal is to get to bed early tonight because I never sat down one time today unless you count the time I spent driving from breakfast with AJ to coffee with my friend Jenn to lunch with Gulley to carpool to pick up Caroline to gymnastics to the library and, finally, back home. I’m flat worn out.

So here’s a quick list of somewhere between a couple and several things.

1. Some of you asked about the top I was wearing in the the picture yesterday. It’s a brand called Beyond Vintage and I found it online at Piperlime. But before I give you the link, I am compelled to give a lengthy explanation about it because I don’t want you to think I throw around money like I’m Sue Ellen Ewing.

I saw it about a year ago and fell in love with it. IN LOVE. It was everything I’d ever wanted in a top. But, alas, it was way more than my $15.00 limit and so I’d just visit it from time to time on the computer. Then, one day last fall, it was suddenly on sale for 50% off, plus I had a coupon for 15% off. MY JOY KNEW NO BOUNDS. I ordered it so fast it would make your head spin.

Then I went back to the Piperlime site about an hour later because I was going to link to it on Fashion Friday that week and, LO AND BEHOLD, it wasn’t on sale anymore. It all happened so fast that I could only assume they made a mistake and worried that they were going to email me and explain it was still full price. BUT THEY DIDN’T. Clearly, it was all a fashion blessing sent straight from heaven.

Here’s the link to it on Piperlime. And, let me just say, it’s even better in person. Also, it runs small.

**Edited to add: Apparently it has now sold out. I wish that meant Piperlime would be sending me a big fat commission check, but all they’re going to give me is free shipping. Which they give to everyone. ***

2. Speaking of heaven, yesterday afternoon Caroline was sitting at the island in our kitchen doing her homework. She was looking out our back windows, daydreaming instead of practicing her spelling words, when I thought she said, “Mama! I see an angel in the neighbor’s trees and he’s tying ropes to the limbs to keep them safe!”

And I was like “WHAT? YOU SEE WHAT?”, thinking to myself OH MY GOSH! Is God giving Caroline some kind of supernatural sightings of heavenly creatures?

Then she repeated herself, “I see Angel in the neighbor’s trees and he’s tying ropes to the limbs to keep them safe!”

I looked out the window and realized she was seeing Angel, the tree guy who does a lot of work for P’s company, trimming our neighbor’s trees and lowering the cut branches to the ground with rope.

So, no supernatural sightings of heavenly beings. Just regular sightings of Hispanic tree-trimmers.

3. If you live in San Antonio I feel compelled to tell you that the West Elm store in the Quarry is closing and their entire inventory is 40% off. I went in there yesterday, felt completely overwhelmed at all the bargains and the pressure of ALL SALES FINAL and left with nothing. But they still have some really great stuff left.

4. Yesterday Gulley and I went to lunch. We were talking about our night at the rodeo last week and I said, “I had to delete the picture Julie took of you and me. It was TERRIBLE of me.” Then I went on to say, “And I’ll be honest, it was a REALLY BAD picture of you, too.”

And Gulley, bless her heart, didn’t even say anything about it. We just went on with our conversation until she brought it up about fifteen minutes later and, I’m not kidding, we laughed until we had tears running down our cheeks because WHO SAYS THAT TO ANOTHER PERSON?

Me. I say that.

I’m glad she loves me anyway because we called each other on and off the rest of the day and laughed about it all over again.

5. I thought American Idol was on Tuesday nights and spent all day excited about it. So imagine my disappointment when it wasn’t on. Didn’t it used to be on Tuesday nights? Did I dream that? Did I dream I was watching American Idol with John Adams on a Tuesday night?

Five seems like a good number to end on. Especially because I’m out of things to write.

Good day to you.

So it wasn’t all bike riding around here this past weekend, but before I recap the whole shebang in mind-numbing detail I have to share what I dreamed about last night. John Adams. That’s right, I said John Adams. And maybe you’re thinking that John Adams is a neighbor or a family friend, but you would be wrong. I mean John Adams as in the second President of the United States, John Adams.

I don’t understand.

P and I watched the HBO miniseries about John Adams last summer in a fit of 4th of July patriotism, but I haven’t given him much thought in recent months because, well, he was the second President of the United States and doesn’t really fit into my day to day life. Sadly, I don’t really remember much about the actual dream but only that I woke up around 3:00 a.m., remembered I was in the middle of a dream about John Adams, and wondered if being almost forty years old means your brain is so bored that your subconscious finally says, “What the heck, let’s dream about American history”.

Or maybe it’s because John Adams was such a piece of eye candy.

That must be it.

Anyway, back to the weekend. Or the days prior to the weekend.

I realized I never mentioned that last Wednesday night I went to the rodeo with a group of friends. My friend Julie invited our Birthday Club group to see Miranda Lambert at the rodeo and rented us a limo to get there. The best part was it ended up being a gigantic, white limo and felt a little bit like something from a Madonna video. Naturally, I took no photos of the limo because that would have made too much sense.

Here’s a picture of us before we left though.

The cute two year old grabbing his mama’s leg did not go with us. Although he really wanted to. And I can’t speak for the rest of the girls but I immediately regretted my decision to wear my hair down. The humidity wreaked major havoc on it by the end of the night. Not even my Freeze It hairspray could save it. Pitiful.

We all loved Miranda (like we’re on a first name basis) and she put on a great show. After it was over we decided that the corn dogs and gorditas hadn’t filled us up and asked Norm the limo driver to take us to Taco Cabana. Sadly, they were just about to close but Norm came to the rescue and talked them into opening the doors for us. I’m sure they were totally disappointed to see that the limo only contained six middle-aged mothers and approximately zero celebrities, but they served us some tacos anyway.

Saturday morning we woke up to drizzle and rain. Caroline wanted to go play with Jackson and Will so we headed over to their house. Will and I were visiting in the living room and somehow the subject of my age came up. Gulley asked Will how old he thought I was. He looked at me for a second and answered, “Fifty-nine”. I was already in the midst of some self-image issues so Gulley said, “Don’t pay any attention to him. He doesn’t know.” She even pulled out our old favorite, “REJECT IT”. Then, in an attempt to prove her point, she asked, “Will, how old do you think I am?” He looked at her and said, “Thirty”.

It’s like he knew I was going to start having dreams about former Presidents.

Caroline had a basketball game later that afternoon and she scored a career high THREE baskets. (I know, I know. It’s not called a goal. It’s a basket.) After that, the boys came over to spend the night because they’d spent the entire earlier part of the day informing us that we NEVER let them have sleep overs. NEVER. Caroline even told Gulley she was going to give her a THOUSAND BOOS for the lack of sleep overs.

So the boys came over and they all climbed in my bed to watch a movie.

The movie ended about 9:30. And that’s when Jackson decided he wanted me to call Gulley to pick him up, while Will announced that he was STAYING. He said, “MEL, I’M ONLY SIX YEARS OLD, BUT I’M STAYING!” Gulley showed up to get Jackson, asked Will if he was sure he wanted to stay, and he said, “YES!” By the time I walked back inside, Will was sitting on the couch crying and said he’d changed his mind so I called Gulley, she made the block and came back to pick up Will.

This happens almost every time we agree to let them have a sleep over. Which is why we are the meanest mothers around and almost NEVER let them have sleep overs.

That was the weekend.

And now I need to go to bed.

Fingers crossed that tonight I dream about Grover Cleveland.

Well, we did not spend our Valentines Day Eve watching Lady Gaga hatch out of an egg. Instead, we watched The Great Outdoors because P really enjoys few thing more than movies from the 80’s starring John Candy. God rest his soul.

(John Candy’s soul. Not P’s soul. P is still with us. He’s sitting right here next to me in his gingerbread pajama pants.)

Anyway, we’ve had a great weekend full of rodeo carnivals, birthday parties, basketball games, and yard work. In other words, I am exhausted. And, as I thought long and hard about something meaningful to share with y’all on Valentines Day, I went back to my archives and looked at what I’d written over the last several years on Valentines Day. Only to discover that, for the last two years, it’s fallen on a Saturday and Sunday and I haven’t posted anything. But then I found this gem from February 2008 and decided to repost it. Because you know what never changes? The songs that define the angst of your teenage years.

So here it is. A repost. Because I have reached new heights of laziness tonight.

I thought long and hard for about five minutes about what I’d write about today. I mean, after all, it is the high and holy day for the Hallmark corporation and I felt like it needed the proper respect. I finally decided to present my list of the Best and Worst love songs ever.

But then, the more I thought about it, I decided that list would be entirely too complicated. Obviously the list of the best would include classics like “Crazy” by Patsy Cline and “At Last” by Etta James and “Two Out of Three Ain’t Bad” by Meatloaf.

It just didn’t seem fair to poor Sergio Mendes who was destined to end up on my Worst List with “Never Gonna Let You Go”.

What to do? What to do?

I hereby present my list of songs that were extremely meaningful to me during my teen years, otherwise known as The Time I Cried in My Bedroom and Lip-Synched Dramatically in Front of the Mirror for Seven Years.

And remember, this is back when I looked like this.

And this.

(I don’t know if Slash was aware that a sixteen-year-old girl in Beaumont, Texas was copying his hairstyle)

There were days when the only thing that got me through was the Chicago 17 Album. God bless you, Peter Cetera and David Foster.

Here is my list.

1. “You’re the Inspiration” by Chicago

I didn’t actually have a boyfriend who was my inspiration when this song came out. However, my best friend, Tracy, and her boyfriend, Wade, had been going together for like two whole weeks and this was their song.

I could only dream that I might find that kind of true love for myself.

2. “Open Arms” by Journey

It wouldn’t be fair to my fifth grade crush, Phillip, if I left this song off the list. There were so many Friday nights at The Magic Skate when they would play this song and I would giggle with my friends about how cute he was with that comb sticking out of his back pocket.

But, like the song says, “we drifted apart”, mainly due to the fact that we ended up attending different junior highs.

3. “All Out of Love” by Air Supply

If you didn’t love you some Air Supply in the 80’s, then I don’t know if we can be friends. Why can’t I quit you, Air Supply?

4. “Keep on Loving You” by Reo Speedwagon

I kept a portable cassette player next to the radio at all times so any time this song came on, I could instantly press record and play. And maybe, just maybe, it would be the time I’d get the entire song without the DJ talking over it.

5. “Stuck on You” by Lionel Richie

Oh, I know Lionel had other songs that were more popular. You know like, “Hello”, when he dated that blind girl that sculpted that weird-looking bust of him.

But this song was special because it was the song we were dancing to when a boy named Danny asked me to go with him. Of course, we were twelve so we never really went anywhere or did anything. However, just knowing that I could draw his name in a big, puffy heart on my bookcovers was enough.

6. “Total Eclipse of the Heart” by Bonnie Tyler

I won’t even lie to y’all. To this day if this song comes on the radio I will turn it up and sing along complete with hand gestures.

You would think I’d be embarrassed to admit that. And I should be.

7. “Crazy for You” by Madonna

This was back in the good old days when Madonna wore lace hose, fingerless gloves and those huge bows in her hair. I can’t remember who I was crazy for when this song came out, but it might have just been Madonna.

Who knew she’d still be around at 75?

8. “Glory of Love” by Peter Cetera

“Karate Kid II”, anyone?

This song played a crucial role in my own personal love triangle the summer before my sophomore year in high school. Neither one of those boys ended up traveling to Japan to use their Ka-Rah-Tay skills to fight for my honor.

And if memory serves, that love triangle ended the same way Kelly Taylor decided between Dylan and Brandon. I chose me.

Or maybe I just chose another boy. I can’t really remember.

9. “Tonight I Celebrate My Love” by Peabo Bryson

This will always remind me of Bo and Hope on “Days of Our Lives”. Now that is true love.

I mean, their love has survived eight fake deaths, three remarriages, several brain-washings and multiple misunderstandings caused by Stefano DiMera.

If that isn’t love worth celebrating, then I don’t know what is.

10. “Separate Lives” by Phil Collins

This totally summed up how I felt when my crush of over two years had to move away. I was devastated. I related so much to the movie “White Nights” and this song, except that we weren’t apart due to the Cold War and my need to be a ballet dancer.

We were apart because his dad got a new job in another city.

But still, the similarities were uncanny.

I realize I have left out many, many quality songs. It is hard to narrow down the quality music from the 80’s and I already feel bad that “Heaven” by Bryan Adams didn’t make my list. Not to mention “Babe” by Styx and “Is This Love?” by Whitesnake.

However, I tried to limit it to songs that meant something to me. Songs that reflect a time in my life when real love wasn’t measured by superficial things, but by the proximity of your locker to the one you loved and whether or not he had a driver’s license.

So, what about y’all? What are the songs that made you want to couple skate every time you heard them?

I wish you all a Happy Valentines Day complete with chocolates filled with mysterious varieties of nougat. Or, better yet, a few packs of Valentines M&Ms.

***Oh! Also a quick reminder that the book club discussion for Half Broke Horses will be this Thursday, the 17th. Can’t wait to hear y’alls thoughts on it.***

Normally it’s at least Thursday before I lose my ability to compile all my thoughts and musings into one incredibly long, slightly boring, cohesive blog post. But I have had one of those days where unimportant things have driven me slightly out of my mind and left me feeling a wee bit irritable and slightly weepy. I am a treasure to be around in person right now if you don’t mind the occasional growl or tearful outburst.

But on to happier, shinier things!

1. On Friday night, after recovering from the joy of Blizzard 2011, P and I went to see True Grit. It was one of the best movies I’ve seen in a long time. Not that I’ve recently seen many movies that don’t involve animated characters, but, still, great movie and great performances.

I especially loved the little girl who played Mattie Ross. And tried to not let myself be distracted by the man behind us who kept whispering loudly to his date, “THAT GIRL IS JERRY SEINFELD’S DAUGHTER. SHE’S SEINFELD’S DAUGHTER.”

Sir, her name is Hailee Steinfeld. Steinfeld. With a t.

2. Over the years I have mentioned HEB once or eight million times on this blog. And many of you who hail from other parts of the United States and, lo, even, THE WORLD, never fail to ask how it’s pronounced and why it is such a prominent feature in my life.

Here’s a commercial that aired during the Super Bowl that should answer all your questions.

I love it just a little.

Also, I’ll tell you what else we wouldn’t have without HEB, any place to grocery shop besides Walmart.

3. Some of you emailed yesterday and asked if I was starting to moderate comments. The answer is no. There is some sort of glitch with the flux capacitor in my comment section and it’s causing WordPress to hold some comments until I approve them.

We here at Big Mama, Inc. are working furiously behind the scenes to remedy this issue. Which means that we aren’t really doing anything about it but hoping it just magically fixes itself. Also, there’s no one here but me.

4. They are forecasting COLD RAIN for first thing this morning. COLD RAIN. As if we can’t figure that out by virtue of the fact that it’s going to be 37 degrees and rainy.

5. I’m over second grade homework. I don’t believe second graders should have homework unless they are woefully behind. It’s not like they’re taking the SAT next week. They’re seven.

6. A reminder for my San Antonio area peeps, Priscilla Shirer is going to be here February 25-26th for a Going Beyond event. You really don’t want to miss it. She is an amazing speaker.

7. See y’all tomorrow.

It is 25 degrees here right now. I realize that’s what some of you northern folks refer to as Spring, but down here that is flat out cold. Like two pairs of socks and break out my seldom worn long-johns kind of cold. Or, better yet, stay inside by the fire where it’s warm and the hot chocolate flows like milk and honey cold.

Last night I slept in Caroline’s room. I’ve actually been sleeping in there every night since she was sick last week because we have a loose system of sleeping arrangements around here. We basically go with whatever bed seems the most comfortable and has the least amount of snorers and/or coughers. Which I guess, technically would be P’s bed right now because I have contracted Caroline’s cough and she’s still congested and we are just a noisy, wheezy pair. I don’t think P is sad that we’re in exile in the other part of the house.

Anyway, I woke up about 3:00 a.m. when the cold front started blowing in. The wind was unbelievably loud and the trees outside her window were making a huge racket. And then the birds started to go bananas. They were chirping and tweeting and singing. It sounded like there were a hundred of them outside her window.

I wondered if maybe a nest had gotten blown down in the wind and figured they would quiet down in a minute. Then the rain started to pour and they continued to tweet and sing. I’d never heard anything like it. I laid there in bed and began to wax poetic about how the little sparrows (or whatever they happened to be) were presenting such a great analogy of life. I began to compose a blog post in my head about the importance of remembering to sing even during the storms of life and how they are such a beautiful picture of trusting God with all that comes our way.

And then I drifted back off to sleep.

Until Caroline woke me up about thirty minutes later to let me know that our sound machine had somehow been switched from the sound of Rainfall to Tropical Rainforest.

Which would explain why the birds were still chirping.

And, also, the monkeys.

Best I can tell, the power went out for a brief moment when the wind started to howl. And the sound machine automatically resets itself to Tropical Rainforest anytime it’s disconnected from a power source.

I’m going to blame the Benadryl that I took right before bed as the reason it didn’t occur to me that you generally don’t hear the call of the Keel-Billed Toucan in South Texas.

However, I still maintain that it’s important to sing through the storms of life.

Amen.