Month: March 2013

Because it always comes back to the antelope

Listen.

I know there are days that I say I have nothing to write about it and then blah, blah, blah for the next 1,000 words.

But I don’t think today is going to be one of those days.

I’m out of words.

And here’s a large part of the reason why.

I’ve been writing my second book for the last six months. I KNOW. I haven’t even said a word about it.

But it’s true.

It’s tentatively going to be called The Antelope in the Living Room and will be a memoir of marriage. Specifically, my marriage. Because how weird would it be for me to write an entire book about someone else’s marriage?

Not to mention the potential to wind up as part of a lawsuit.

Anyway, my deadline to turn the book in is April 1st. As in this April 1st. As in OH MY WORD IT’S ALREADY MARCH AND WHAT IS HAPPENING?

Apparently I struggle with time management. Or perhaps I write books just like I worked on college term papers which is to say I find new ways to turn procrastination into a form of high art.

Whatever the case, I can’t promise I’ll be posting every day during March and I wanted to give you the heads up because it seems like the right thing to do. Otherwise you might begin to wonder if something is wrong and if I’m not mentioning it and the whole thing could truly become like an antelope in the living room.

Or whatever.

And the truth is that sometimes it gets easier for me to write once I give myself permission not to write. Does that make sense anywhere besides my head?

Probably not.

Thanks for understanding, y’all.
Sing a song a boot Texas

Well.

It’s funny how things work out. Or don’t work out as the case may be.

As it turns out, I didn’t end up spending my Saturday morning in the 33 degree weather watching Caroline play soccer.

Mainly because this happened on Friday afternoon.

She turned into the Terminator.

Actually, that’s her foot. In a boot.

Which I like to say in a Canadian accent.

Even though the only time I’ve actually been to Canada was a quick trip to Vancouver back in 1999 and all I saw was the inside of a Hilton because it was for a pharmaceutical sales meeting and it always seemed they had a strict policy against allowing us to actually see the city we were visiting.

So basically what I’m saying is that I’m just making a complete stereotype that Canadians really say “A boot”. And you should also know that my sense of humor was totally lost on Caroline as I kept saying, “You’re A Boot to get A Boot”.

But considering this is the face she made when I asked her to smile for the camera, I don’t feel like she’s in a position to judge my Canadian humor.

Clearly the big question is what happened?

Yes. We don’t really know for sure.

For the last week Caroline had been complaining about her ankle. And so she’d come home from school and we’d put some ice on it and take an Advil. (Yes. We would take an Advil. One for her, one for me because the whole ankle thing was making my head hurt because I wasn’t sure what to do about it since there’d been no definitive injury.)

Finally P said I should probably take her in to see the doctor. So I picked her up from school early on Friday and we went to the doctor so we could shell out any money we hoped to save for something fun on X-Rays and an exam.

As it turns out, she has a fractured growth plate. Which sounds a lot worse than what it really is. The truth is it’s a kid version of a sprained ankle, but kids still have soft growth plates to allow their legs and arms to grow to normal size because ideally no one wants T-Rex arms.

However, these growth plates can be traumatized (Can’t we all?) and that is what happened to Caroline at some point during soccer practice or jumping down repeatedly from the tree in our backyard or while trying to do flips off the monkey bars at recess. There is really no telling.

But she has to wear the boot for two weeks and keep it immobilized.

Which translates to no soccer games for two weeks.

However, she and P still went to the game on Saturday morning to support her team. I did not feel called to such dedication and showed my support by staying in my warm bed until I woke up at 9:45 a.m. and watched an old episode of 90210. I felt like it was the right decision.

They came home around 11:00 with breakfast tacos because they’d missed the chicken biscuit at Chick-Fil-A by six minutes. Which is almost just cruel. P asked me why I didn’t run over to Chick-Fil-A to get us all biscuits and I had to wonder what alternate universe he has ever lived in where I get out of bed on a cold Saturday morning even for a chicken biscuit. We’ve been married almost sixteen years and I feel like he should know me better than that.

But the breakfast tacos were delicious and seemed a fitting choice since Saturday was Texas Independence Day. And while we didn’t want to be a part of Mexico, we are certainly grateful for their food.

Then Saturday night P grilled quail and we sat outside and listened to Waylon Jennings and Willie Nelson and Merle Haggard. And looked at the stars in the sky and made a toast to all things Texas.

God bless it. It’s a boot the best place on earth.
Fashion Friday: Edition the road goes on forever and the sparkly green earrings never end

When you write a book entitled Sparkly Green Earrings you get a lot of pairs of sparkly green earrings.

And I love each and every pair. Because green goes with a surprising amount of stuff. And it’s the color of the year. And each pair of earrings has its own unique personality.

I don’t really know if an earring can have a personality, but let’s go with it.

By the way, my next book will be titled Big Louis Vuitton Purse with Matching Wallet.

Oh how I love to kid.

But, seriously, I have a theme going and so I’m going to go with it and today I’m giving away yet another pair of sparkly green earrings. These are from Francesca’s and are so pretty. This picture doesn’t do them justice.

All you have to do for a chance to win is leave a comment on this post. Maybe you can tell me if you’re doing something that sounds more uncomfortable than watching your daughter play soccer at 9:00 a.m. on Saturday morning when the temperature is supposed to be 33 degrees since winter decided March was a good time to show up.

Of course if you live up north you can tell me that you laugh in the face of 33 degrees and if it were going to be 33 degrees at your house you’d put the kids in their bathing suits and go for a swim.

Either way.

Now for some cute stuff I’ve seen this week.

1. watercolor striped maxi skirt

I realize this skirt is not subtle. But something about it beckons me. I like the vertical stripes. I like the colors. And I think it would look darling with a denim jacket, a tank and some sandals.

2. tie dye dress

I like this. It’s a little funky. By which I mean it’s tie-dyed and bohemian. Not that it smells bad.

3. cozy short sleeve tee

This is the perfect tee. A little oversized, but a great color that would look so great with white shorts or jeans for spring and summer.

4. you’re so sweet top

I think we all know how I feel about a white top. I have a problem.

5. canvas field jacket

This is a great jacket to just throw on with a t-shirt and jeans. Or to put over a navy and white striped shirt with maybe a scarf. It’s just versatile.

6. la dee dots top

I like this top. I think my favorite is the coral one, but they are all cute depending on how you feel about various color combinations. And dots.

If you don’t like dots, then you should move along to the next thing.

7. gap skimmer jeans

Someone asked me last weekend about my thoughts on capris. It’s all so complex. First, I think the term “capri” has jumped the shark. Gap, for instance, has decided to call them skimmers.

Second, you need to make sure a cropped pant (no matter the name) hits you at the right spot. NEVER just below the knee. That’s tragic. They should hit below mid-calf or longer so that they create a flattering silhouette.

And apparently once you get the length right you feel free to walk around like a cat stretching as demonstrated by this Gap model.

8. fluid henley blouse

This is a great blouse. Lots of great colors. Good length. Good shape.

9. striped dolman top

Y’all. This shirt is only $11 at Forever 21. Okay, it’s $11.80. But still.

It’s the perfect striped shirt and also comes in other good color combinations.

10. colored bangle set

The other thing I mentioned this weekend is my love of buying accessories at Forever 21. They’re cheap and easy. (Insert joke here.)

But, seriously, you can buy a stack of bracelets for $5.00. And then you can buy another stack to create more layers and you’ve only spent $10 total. This is also a great thing to do to create that multiple layered necklace look without spending much money.

And that’s it for today.

Don’t forget to leave a comment for a chance to win the earrings.

Y’all have a good Friday.