Yesterday morning I had to do something that is, in my opinion, completely barbaric. I had to catch a flight to Dallas that left at 7:30 a.m. which means I had to leave my house at 6:15 which means that I was up before the crack of early at 5:00 a.m.
See, the “bank” where I work decided that nothing really puts employees in the Christmas spirit more than shipping them off away from friends and loved ones right in the middle of the holiday season. And just to make it more festive? Let’s allow them to see what early morning at the airport (otherwise known as hell) looks like.
So, the alarm goes off this morning and since P loves me and is the greatest person ever, he has already gotten up and turned the heat on for me so that at least I won’t freeze to death while getting dressed. I sleepwalk through the basic functions of personal hygiene, stopping only to admire the lovely red sleep creases etching themselves across my face. Then I wrestled with my suitcase in a vain attempt to get it to actually zip all the way closed. I’m a chronic overpacker. It’s what I do. I need options.
At 6:15 the cab company calls to let me know that my cab is arriving, so I walk out the back door since I had requested that the driver pull up on the side of my house. We try not to use our front door while Caroline is asleep because due to the fact that the house is almost 100 years old and the foundation constantly shifts, opening the front door produces a sound somewhere in the same decibel range as a building being demolitioned.
I didn’t see the cab until I noticed red brake lights coming from the front of the house, so I wheeled my suitcase around the house and got in the cab. I told the driver that I thought he was going to pull up on the side of the house and his response was the he couldn’t tell what the side of the house meant, so apparently he just went to the FRONT side. Turning on the side street that runs along the side of our house would have been too obvious a choice.
I know I’m grumpy but the moon was still out and everything. That’s how early it was.
I get to the airport, check in, and wait in a security line where I’m told that I can keep my lipgloss if I want to buy a .25 cent ziploc bag to put it in. Um, yeah there’s no profit margin in that is there?
I take off my shoes and my jacket and unload the entire contents of my computer bag. Business travel is just so glamorous. I am so grateful to the bank for giving me this opportunity.
Finally, I arrived at the hotel and checked in. While checking in at the bank reservation table to get my meeting itinerary, the lady smiles and tells me that there has been a change in schedule and the meetings won’t actually start until 1:30 p.m.
It’s 9:00 a.m.
The whole thing has filled me with so much holiday cheer that honestly, I’m thinking this trip must be my Christmas bonus.
How could it get any better?
Wait, I just realized the icing on the cake, high speed wifi at this particular hotel is a complete oxymoron.
Now it’s like Christmas and New Years all at the same time!