Wow. They aren’t kidding about that whole killer whale thing.
Shamu – 1 Melanie – 0
That’s not a photo of the real Shamu leaping out of the perfectly landscaped flowers, by the way. I wish I had one to share with you but my iPhone doesn’t come with a telephoto lens and it wouldn’t have mattered anyway because I was too busy counting heads and making sure no one decided to run off in search of cotton candy to take close up photos of a whale. Plus, I’m assuming you’ve seen one before and don’t really need a visual aid.
Yesterday morning I got up a little earlier than usual because I knew I’d need the extra time to pack two sack lunches and get us all sunscreened up in preparation for our day o’ fun. I dropped Caroline off at school so she could ride the school bus to Sea World with her class and headed to meet them in my own car. Her teacher had sent a note home asking parents to please take their own cars because there wouldn’t be enough room for everyone on the school bus and for that I am forever grateful. I didn’t really handle the school bus experience that well when I was actually in school, so you can only imagine what my late thirties have done to me in terms of transportation flexibility.
I arrived about thirty minutes before the bus and huddled together with a group of parents as we attempted to stay warm. What none of us counted on was that the temps (What am I? A meteorologist? Temps?) were in the high 50’s and we’d all dressed like it was in the high 80’s because we live in San Antonio and it’s the end of April and it’s always in the high 80’s by the end of April. Who needs to watch the weather this time of year? The forecast is HOT AND GETTING HOTTER. Except for yesterday. If any of the gift shops had been open they would have made a killing selling Shamu sweatshirts for $50 a pop.
Eventually the kids arrived and I was assigned my own little group of five girls, including Caroline, to guide through the park. We spent the morning learning about the differences between sea lions and seals, how many pounds of snow are produced in the penguin exhibit each day, and why you should never, EVER pick up a fake fingernail that you find on the ground. (I personally conducted that last lecture and I feel it will be a life lesson that will benefit and perhaps scar them all forever.)
The girls fed the sea lions and the dolphins.
They tried to feed the alligators but they weren’t hungry. I didn’t miss the opportunity to tell them that the alligators were probably full from eating a first grader that wandered away from their field trip chaperone. Don’t judge me. That park was swarming with kids and I did what had to be done.
Caroline fell in love with the shark exhibit and the coral reefs full of fish and asked for my phone so she could take pictures. At the end of the day there were about 276 photos of everything from someone’s foot to the sandwich she ate for lunch, but she did take one picture that I think looks a little bit like a piece of colorful, yet blurry, art.
Or maybe I just think that because I’m her mother. And I’m really tired.
After lunch, everyone was herded into Shamu’s stadium for an educational lesson on killer whales and then when it was over we walked five miles to listen to a two minute presentation about sea lions. Totally worth it.
Finally it was time to get the kids back on the bus. I walked Caroline and the other girls to the meeting spot, told her I loved her and asked for a hug. She said, “MOM. I NEED TO GET ON THE BUS. I’M GOING TO BE LATE.” and got on the bus just like she was fifteen years old. Whatever happened to “Thank you, mama, for spending your entire day at Sea World when you could have spent that time trying to get your eyebrows under control or folding the laundry that’s been sitting on top of the dryer for two weeks.”?
I got in my car, turned on some music to take me to my happy place, and headed to Happy Hour.
Many of you have mentioned that you aren’t familiar with Sonic or that they don’t have them where you live. I’m not one to tell people what to do, but you really need to put your house on the market and move TOOT SUITE to a town that has a Sonic. You are living a shadow of what your life could be.
Then I got home and made Ree’s French Breakfast Puffs for Bible Study tomorrow morning while I sang “I’m Every Woman” by Whitney Houston.
And I ate one of them. Or maybe two.
Three at the most.
And then we ordered sushi for dinner because we are cold and heartless creatures who were apparently unmoved by all the sea life we communed with throughout the day.
A long time ago, before I had a child, a woman told me in all seriousness that the worst part of raising kids was having to endure the theme parks. Even after yesterday’s field trip, I don’t agree with that statement. I still contend that the worst part of raising kids is having to take them to the zoo.
Because, the smell of the penguin habit notwithstanding, Sea World is not a bad place to spend a day.
Especially with a six-year-old who won’t be six forever.