Author: Big Mama

I woke up to the news yesterday that Duchess Kate was finally officially in labor. And that was pretty much my day.

Unless you count the moment I felt ripped off when I saw that this happened.

That’s a real live town crier. Like from Cinderella or something.

Can we take bets as to how long this becomes a thing on Pinterest where women hire someone to dress up like this to announce the birth of their child to their friends in the waiting room?

Also, I’m thinking Phillip for the name. I mean Kate hasn’t told me that or anything, it’s just my personal favorite based on the fact that it’s not like they can name him something like Kevin.

But I was convinced it was going to be a girl so you should probably not head to Vegas to place bets on anything I say.

In other non-royal news, I have to tell you (with just a little bit of pride and satisfaction) that I have succeeded in my goal to read more books this summer. And we still have five weeks left.

So, considering that yesterday was spent on royal baby watch and going to the pool, I thought this was a good time to share what I’ve read so far with a quick review of each.

1. Where’d You Go, Bernadette: A Novel

This was a fun, quirky read. I loved the humor and that it was ultimately a sweet story about the love between a mother and a daughter.

2. The American Heiress: A Novel

I picked this up at Target right before a trip. I’m a sucker for anything about an heiress. And it was pretty good. I kept waiting for it to take an interesting twist that never really happened, but it still kept my attention until the end.

3. The Harbinger: The Ancient Mystery That Holds the Secret of America’s Future

This one fascinated me. I’d heard from several people that it was a must-read. All I can say is that if you were ever hooked on the Left Behind series, then you’ll probably like this book.

4. Unbroken: A World War II Story of Survival, Resilience, and Redemption

I know I’ve already mentioned this one, but it went straight to the top ten of my favorite books ever. It’s an incredible story filled with heart and adventure. I loved it. But I love most things that discuss World War II.

5. The Language of Flowers: A Novel

I finished this yesterday morning. I read the whole thing in less than twenty-four hours. It’s a beautifully written, heartbreaking story and I loved learning the meanings of various flowers.

And so those are the five books I’ve read so far. I’m taking a quick trip to Tyler, Texas later today (Edited to add that I’m speaking at Marvin Methodist Church tonight. Feel free to come if you’re in the area.) so I’m sure I’ll pick up something else at the airport. I’d like to get in at least one more book before I spend a week reading People and US Weekly’s reports on the new prince.

We made it home from the road trip late Friday afternoon. And then I fell into bed and slept until five minutes ago.

Not really. But I could have.

In fact, after we got home I began to unpack while telling P all about our trip and kept losing my train of thought. He looked at me and said, “Man, you really are tired, aren’t you?” As if I’d been lying. It also didn’t help that I woke up Friday morning with what I originally thought was pink eye, but turned out to be a stye. Either way, look away, I am hideous.

P left about an hour after we got home to drive to the coast and fish in a tournament with some friends. Caroline and I met Gulley and Will for Mexican food even though we’d just seen them and then we returned back to our respective homes to unwind. That’s when I got on Twitter and learned that a woman died while riding a roller coaster at Six Flags.

Here’s the thing. We didn’t ride the Texas Giant while we were there because the lines were too long and the kids didn’t care to ride it. But on every ride we rode I tried to make myself feel better by telling myself that you never hear about anyone dying on a roller coaster. And then two days later someone dies on a roller coaster. I cannot even imagine. It’s so tragic.

Needless to say, I think it might be a long time before I get on another roller coaster.

Saturday morning, Caroline and I slept in until after 10 and then she immediately woke up and asked me what we were going to do for the day. Umm. Nothing?

I told her I had to get some work done because I’d spent the whole week before acting like I had no real responsibilities or commitments and she decided that my plan to work sounded LAME so she called Mimi and Bops and asked them to come get her. Which they did. And kept her for the rest of the day while I worked on book edits and washed the white slipcovers on my couch that didn’t look white anymore and made a grocery list and researched Pinterest for the perfect shade of gray to paint the exterior of our house.

Just to clarify: I’m not painting the exterior of our house. We’ve hired someone to paint the exterior of our house. In a fortunate turn of events, the hail storm on Easter damaged our paint and insurance is covering the bulk of getting our whole house repainted.

P called late Saturday afternoon with the news that his team had won the fishing tournament and he even won a separate award for “largest red fish”. I was so happy for him. Until he got home around 10:00 p.m. and I discovered his victory came complete with a plaque.

That he placed proudly on the bookshelves in our living room.

I hate to show you for fear you won’t be able to overcome your envy.

The only thing it lacks is the ability to sing “Don’t Worry, Be Happy” when you push a button.

I’m just thankful that Caroline has now begged to display the plaque in her playroom. Which, what kind of parents would we be if we said no to that?

So my plan for tomorrow is to unselfishly help her find just the right spot for it.

The road trip officially ends today. We’ll pack up in the morning and make the last leg of the trip back to San Antonio. And then I might fall into my own bed for several days. Except I won’t be able to because I still have to finish the final edits on my book. Apparently I’m a big fan of procrastination.

And this has nothing to do with anything, but I want to share that one of the lead stories on the news in Bryan the other night involved a man who robbed a convenience store and stole a bag of chips and a t-shirt that read “Jesus is my BFF”. You can’t get that kind of news just anywhere.

Now here are some cute things I found in the last ten minutes because I haven’t spent any time in the last few days thinking about clothes, unless you count what we wore to Six Flags and how those things will never be the same.

1. sanctuary lace shift dress

I think this is just beautiful. It also comes in black.

2. ezri print maxi dress

Love the print on this.

3. daniel rainn lace silk blouse

This is really pretty. Perfect by itself or with a jacket thrown over it.

4. sanctuary camo jacket

I think this is a really cute, casual option for fall.

5. anna printed striped shift

Love the colors in this.

6. embroidered peasant top

I’ve had my eye on this for a while.

And DON’T MISS Nordstrom’s big sale that starts tomorrow. It’s a great time to get discounts on brand new fall merchandise. There will be all manner of great boots, bags, jeans, etc. on sale.

7. michael kors chain bracelet watch

This is one of the things that I’m hoping might be on sale. If so, it might be my early birthday present to myself.

8. roll tab sleeve woven shirt

I really like this. It comes in several different colors and is a great price at only $38.

9. sand dune embellished blouse

This is a great summery top. So feminine and pretty.

10. sophie mini dress

Love this as a layer over leggings and with a jacket for fall. It also comes in mint green.

That’s it for today.

Y’all have a great Friday.

Well, we have made it to Bryan/College Station.

We are officially in the seventh circle of exhaustion. I place all the blame on Six Flags. And the travel fan I bought at Target that decided to start rattling at 2 a.m. last night.

The good news is we are officially on the low key side of our travels at this point and can relax. It should also give my neck a little time to work out a kink I incurred on the Yosemite Sam Shoot-Out ride. Yes, that’s considered a mild ride for young children, but don’t discount what can happen when the boat behind you bumps into you while you’re looking backwards. Which is what I plan to tell the office staff when I call the chiropractor’s office to make an appointment on Monday.

(Also, Gulley and I spent the duration of the ride wondering about the political correctness of Porky Pig.)

We left for Six Flags at 10:30 a.m. on Tuesday morning. Our dear friend from college, Hite, met us for the day. Like actually took a vacation day to spend it carrying our backpack all over Six Flags for us and occasionally riding a nausea-inducing ride. That’s true friendship.

The first ride Gulley and the boys chose to ride was some sort of Rocket Ship that went all the way upside down. Caroline, Hite and I decided to forgo this particular ride because it’s never enjoyable to throw up before 11 a.m. But after that we all headed for Runaway Mine Train and that was a huge hit, even though it was the first rollercoaster I’d been on in years and I’d forgotten that those old wooden ones tend to be a little jarring.

Then Gulley and the kids decided to ride the new Texas Sky Screamer. It’s a swing ride that goes up 400 feet in the air. I seriously hyperventilated just watching them from my safe spot on the ground and it didn’t help that Hite mentioned what might happen if one of those cables were to snap.

We went from ride to ride as fast as we could and marveled that it wasn’t boiling hot like it tends to be in July in Texas. Finally, Hite, Caroline and I stopped for lunch while Gulley and the boys went to ride Mr. Freeze. This was a low point in the day because Hite inadvertently spent $24 on his lunch because he didn’t realize his burger already came with onion rings. I realize it’s an amusement park, but any lunch that costs $24 should come with valet parking and a crab cake at the bare minimum.

Later in the day Jen and her little boy, Lincoln, came to meet us. Sadly, this was just about the time it decided to start pouring down rain and all the rides closed. But Linc is only two and he was just as thrilled to splash in the puddles as he would have been on any ride. Being two is awesome.

So the kids ran around in the rain while we all visited and drank $8 Slurpees. Then, just as we thought the rain was going to end our day, it cleared out and they began to open up the rides again starting with the antique cars.

Caroline and I got in one and Will was driving Jen and Linc in the car behind us. When we came around the bend, I realized there was a six car pileup because a car had gotten stuck on the track. I told Caroline to come to a stop and turned around just in time to see Will barreling towards us with a huge grin on his face. I’ve never felt so helpless. I yelled, “TAKE YOUR FOOT OFF THE PEDAL! TAKE YOUR FOOT OFF!” and he finally paid attention about four seconds before I might have ended up in a neck brace.

Then the car Gulley, Jackson and Hite were driving died on the track and they had to walk back to the entrance. We met them there and that’s when Hite and Jen decided they were done with the Six Flags fun. It was understandable considering we were all as wet as if we’d just jumped out of a shower. Well, maybe Hite wasn’t but that’s because he had the foresight to pack a raincoat. Which, by the way, Gulley and I mocked him for earlier in the day. Who’s laughing now?

Our last three hours were fabulous because almost everyone had left the park. We had no lines and rode everything we wanted multiple times. Gulley and I declined to end the night with Aquaman, but that didn’t stop the kids from riding it six times in a row. I feel almost certain the clothes and shoes we had on yesterday will never be the same again. There’s only so much amusement park water that a garment can withstand.

We finally got back to our hotel room eleven hours later. Tired, wet, in need of a masseuse, and a bottle of Advil. But we had the best day and I wouldn’t have traded a minute of it. Except for maybe the part where I wrenched my neck on Yosemite Sam and forgot to close my mouth during the drop on Aquaman.

And now we’re in Bryan, recovering and recouping and planning to sleep at least twelve hours tonight.
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Okay, now for the fun giveaway. My friend, Chrystal Hurst, has written a book called Kingdom Woman: Embracing Your Purpose, Power, and Possibilities with her father, Dr. Tony Evans.

I had the opportunity to read an early copy and I can’t say enough good things about it. One of the things I like about Chrystal is the way she doesn’t pretend to have it all together and that’s the woman we see as she tells her story in this book alongside Dr. Evans practical Biblical teaching. It’s about a real woman doing her best to live in the freedom God has called us to. This isn’t a call to be perfect. It’s about being the woman God created you to be. It’s an inspiring read and I walked away feeling encouraged. I’m almost positive you’ll feel the same way.

And, BEST OF ALL, one of you can win a copy of Kingdom Woman. All you have to do is leave a comment on this post. Maybe it can be about your favorite ride at Six Flags. But really it can be about whatever.

I’ll leave comments open until Sunday at noon and then choose a winner at random.

Day 2 of the road trip: Six Flags Over Texas.

It was awesome. It was exhausting. It was wet.

And I think I might need a chiropractor.

But for now I’m headed to bed because eleven hours at Six Flags? Is A LOT of hours.

So I am once again going to curl up like my friend the porcupine. Possibly with a glass of wine.

Well, this morning at the crack of 11 a.m. Gulley and I loaded up the kids for our annual summer road trip. This is just one of the reasons we are great travel companions; our belief that there is no need to get going any earlier than necessary.

Although I will admit I was a little nervous we wouldn’t have time to get in all the activities we had planned for our first day. In fact, we had several people question our ambitious itinerary, but we felt confident that we were going to be just like Jerry Reed and do what they say can’t be done.

So we packed up her car until we looked like a traveling band of gypsies and made the thirty minute drive to our first stop in New Braunfels. I’m sad to say that it was during this leg of the trip that my own child was the first one to break the “DO NOT ASK HOW LONG UNTIL WE GET THERE” rule.

After a brief reminder that no one is supposed to ask that question during the road trip, we arrived at our destination. The Texas Snake Farm & Exotic Animal Park. The word “Farm” in the title is a bit of a misnomer because it might lead a person to believe there might be assorted snakes milking cows and slopping the pigs. But, sadly, this isn’t the case. It’s just a bunch of various species of snakes in cages that don’t really look so much like cages as maybe old office furniture that someone inherited from their grandparents.

I’ll be honest. It’s a little disconcerting. You know what I need between me and a cobra? About 1,000 miles as opposed to a piece of plexiglass that slides back and forth.

But the kids enjoyed it and recounted all their vast reptile knowledge while Gulley and I tried to pretend we were somewhere else until we eventually herded them outside to the Exotic Animal Park part of this equation. We saw some river otters that were really cute even though I once heard someone say that you should never take on a river otter because “pound for pound they are the most ferocious thing around”. I kept this advice in mind and didn’t challenge them to any sort of duel.

There were also wolves, monkeys, lemurs, peacocks and the ever popular capybara. And then we went into the petting zoo where the kids fed goats and a few potbelly pigs the food we’d purchased along with our tickets. All in all, it was a hit. But I can’t guarantee I’m not going to have a nightmare about snakes and an old stereo console my grandmother used to own.

Our next stop was the glass bottom boats at Aquarena Springs in San Marcos. By this time it had started to rain on us a little bit, but the boats are covered and the kids loved it. Once upon a time there used to be a swimming pig and some mermaids. However, it is much more serious and science-based now, as evidenced by the fact they tout the various fish and plant life you will see on the boat ride. Gulley said she was skeptical about any activity that mentions “plant life” as an actual part of the entertainment, but we ended up finding the whole thing enjoyable and educational.

Finally we made our way to Austin to eat at Shady Grove and then swim at Barton Springs. During our meal the kids began to share about their frustrations with various aspects of school. Gulley and I thought for a moment we’d stumbled into a group therapy type situation. Will remarked that his main annoyance with one classmate is that “all he talks about is the iPhone and how he hates the Samsung brand”. I’d like to say this falls in a category of second grade problems, but in what world?

In theory, swimming at Barton Springs was a great idea because it would achieve two goals. Allowing the kids to see a famous landmark AND wearing them out so they’d be exhausted when we got back in the car to drive to Dallas. What we didn’t take into proper account is that it’s freezing cold in Barton Springs on the best day (hence the spring part of that equation) and when you add in the fact that it was rainy, it created a situation that almost caused our children to contract hypothermia.

So we dried them off and set off for Dallas. This is where I give thanks to God above for the tollway that takes you completely around Austin traffic and spits you out past Georgetown. Otherwise we would have sat in Austin traffic until I lost my will to live.

After several rain showers and a quick stop for baked goods at the Czech Stop in West, we made it to Dallas where everyone was delighted to discover that our hotel has an indoor/outdoor pool. I don’t really know that anything says fancy like that. Gulley and I let the kids go for a late night swim and now we’re all tucked in our hotel room where I plan to emulate this porcupine we saw earlier today at the Snake Farm and Exotic Zoo.