Author: Big Mama

Well school is out. And we were at the pool until it closed. Which means I need to get to bed before I fall over.

But here are some things I’ve found this week:

1. towne & reese avery blake green necklace

I saw this in person the other day and it is really cute. It’s like a fresh take on the bubble necklaces that have taken over the world.

2. isalo floppy hat

Oh my word. I love this hat.

3. raw edge v-neck

I’d forgotten how much I love to just throw on a t-shirt and shorts when the weather gets out. These are on sale and come in a bunch of colors.

4. irina top

Last summer I bought one of these tops and wore it all the time. They come in so many cute colors and patterns and look great dressed up with white jeans or dressed down with shorts. And they are the perfect weight.

5. joie louisa woven tote

How cute is this?

6. summer scroll print maxi dress

I don’t have any occasions this summer, but if I did I would totally buy this dress.

7. swingy elastic waist skirt

A skirt is a great cool alternative to shorts in the summer. And by cool, I mean temperature.

8. ombre dot tunic

I think this is really cute. Love the colors.

9. spring lace coat

I have no need for a spring coat because it’s beyond hot. But I really think this is pretty.

10. lounging singer tunic

This just looks really comfortable. And I am all about comfort.

I realize this has been a very brief Fashion Friday. But now I need to go crawl into bed and sleep for about twelve hours.

Y’all have a good Friday.

Because I feel the need to complete my countdown, today is the last day of school. We have made it, battered and weary, to the finish line. Hallelujah and amen.

Now promise to remind me how anxious I was for summer in a month when I write about how I’m tired of listening to Caroline tell me she’s bored.

So yesterday I went to Smart Barre at 8:30 even though I think I’ve made it clear that I am not a fan of working out that early. It just seems cruel and doesn’t allow me the six to seven hours I prefer to wake up and function like a normal member of society.

But I had to go at 8:30 because I had to be at Field Day at Caroline’s school by 9:45. This basically consisted of an hour of watching my child play tug of war and shoot water guns at her peers while I visited with other mothers and stood in heat that would rival the surface of the sun. Except it wasn’t a dry heat. So it was maybe more like being in a dishwasher set on “SANITIZE” for an hour.

Needless to say, I was fresh as a daisy by the time it was over.

And I was meeting my friend Amy for lunch so I decided to run home and take a quick shower because I find that basic hygiene is a nice touch when lunching with friends. It’s the least I can do to not make people around me dry heave.

So I ran home, took a quick shower and met Amy. We had a lovely lunch and great conversation. Then I left there and ran by the bank because I’m homeroom mom for Caroline’s class which means I’ve spent the last two weeks of my life collecting money for various end of year things. And apparently many people still write checks.

P and I haven’t had checks for our personal checking account for at least eight years. I pay all our bills online and use a debit card or cash for everything else. This wasn’t necessarily an intentional choice to embrace online bill paying technology back in 2005 as much as it was desperation when I realized I’d forgotten to reorder checks and we had bills due. This is pretty much my standard method of adopting any sort of new technology.

For example, the only reason I ever learned how to use email was because the professor of the last class I took in college required us to turn in all our homework by email. He informed me halfway through the semester that I was on track to fail his class because I hadn’t turned in any homework. And I had to admit to him that I wasn’t sure what email even was and had only recently sent my first fax. So my dear friend Hite marched me down to the computer lab and showed me how to enter an email address and I told him email would never be widely used because the addresses were too long.

I also once declared that nothing would ever replace the cassette tape proving that I have always been very insightful.

But back to the checks, I never bothered to order them again after I discovered the beauty of paying bills online and saving all that money on stamps. And it really has worked out beautifully considering that I wasn’t above writing a check to pay for a large Coke at a convenience store. There’s really nothing that endears you to your husband as much as when he has to balance a bank account with multiple checks written for “One dollar and sixty-four cents”.

And if we ever really need a check for something, P has a business checking account. But that’s because he’s a responsible adult who remembers to order checks when they’re running low.

Anyway, I had at least twelve checks that I needed to deposit in our account yesterday. So after lunch I drove through the bank line, filled out the deposit slip and endorsed all the checks. Then I reached for the canister and dropped it. On the ground. Where it rolled. Under my car.

I attempted to get out of the car but I was too close to the pillars holding the magical thing that transports the canister to the teller. I realized I’d need to back up to open the door wide enough to get out and retrieve the canister. So I began to back up the car and that’s when I heard a loud CRUNCH. And I knew like you know when the sour cream has gone bad that it could only be the sound of a Volvo station wagon running over a plastic bank canister.

And I looked up with a deer in the headlights look as I tried to decide if I should just drive off or call the teller or join the Witness Protection Program, only to realize that the teller had been watching the whole scenario play out on the monitor.

Which is why I’m going to have to find a new bank because I can never show my face there again.

We have two days of school left.

This really has nothing to do with probably anything else I may write about as I ramble on for the next however many words, but it’s my personal countdown.

TWO. MORE. DAYS.

Oh, but here’s something. Caroline has decided, with TWO DAYS left of school, that it’s time for her to take on a little more responsibility in the form of packing her own lunch every morning. This would have been a helpful development in, I don’t know, SEPTEMBER. But now it just kind of feels like she’s messing with me.

She’s also asked me why I never make her the delicious sandwiches like her friend brings every day. When I asked a few questions about this “delicious sandwich” it turned out to be peanut butter and jelly. And not even fancy jelly, like peach or strawberry. Just plain grape jelly.

I don’t even understand.

I’ve been trying to get her to be a fan of peanut butter and jelly since she came out of the womb. And now she’s decided I’ve been depriving her? Like I prefer the extra step of getting out the lettuce every morning to make her ham and cheese instead?

But now she’s going to make her own peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for lunch. For the next TWO whole days. Power to the people.

On Monday night we went to go watch Gulley’s oldest son Jackson play baseball in the championship game. His team won on Saturday so only had to win this game to clinch the Little League championship. The games were down at the same fields that looked like a lake only a week ago and, other than the occasional breeze that smelled like something died, it’s amazing that they actually look like baseball fields again.

Jackson won his game while we sat in what I can only describe as a temperature slightly warmer than the inside of my oven. By the time we got home I was so hot that I reached in the refrigerator to grab some water and it didn’t even feel cold inside. I was worried our refrigerator was broken. And I can’t even discuss the clothes I had on. They’ll need to be burned.

And that’s pretty much what’s going on here.

So since summer is imminent and I now have all this free time before me that won’t involve making peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, I’ve decided it might be a good idea to set some goals for myself. Because I enjoy setting myself up for failure and being able to look at a comprehensive list of all the things I didn’t achieve.

Here’s my list that’s subject to change at any given whim:

1. Clean out all of Caroline’s closets and drawers.

We have a large basket full of dress up clothes that still has some size 3T Disney princess costumes that I’m guessing aren’t going to get worn anymore.

Not to mention that I went to get something out of that closet the other day and it smelled funny. I’m a little afeared that someone might have left an old ham sandwich in the dress up basket.

2. Clean out the playroom.

Specifically the toy box that has become a makeshift Barbie graveyard.

3. Clean and organize the shelves in the laundry room.

Perhaps it’s time to move the Crockpot that’s still in the box because I pinned a bunch of things on Pinterest and HAD TO HAVE a Crockpot and then never got it out of the box all winter long.

And I bet Martha Stewart doesn’t store her painting supplies next to her self-rising flour. Nor does she have to cram in three bags of plastic eggs left over from Easter next to a box of Cinnamon Life.

4. Read at least five books.

I just thought of this one this minute. But it feels doable.

Or maybe I’ll just read twelve issues of People magazine instead. Whatever.

5. Not watch The Bachelorette.

This is one I’ve spent some time thinking about. I ALWAYS get sucked into the Bachelor because I am but a weak vessel. And I’m not going to not watch as any kind of moral stand. I just don’t really care who Desiree ends up with.

I mean don’t get me wrong, I think she’s lovely. I’d just rather devote my T.V. watching energies elsewhere.

Which brings me to…

6. Scandal

If I were to have another child I would name her Olivia Pope.

And I’ll be finished with this goal by the weekend. Because I am driven and goal-oriented. And slightly obsessed.

7. Figure out my eyelash situation.

I realized this morning that my right eyelashes don’t curl nearly as well as my left eyelashes. I can’t figure out if it’s because my left eyelashes are fundamentally flawed or if I’m holding my curler different as I curl each side.

Or maybe eyelashes are the same as eyebrows. And as a wise blog reader told me years ago, you have to remember that they are sisters, not twins. No two are alike.

That’s some wisdom.

8. Eat a little healthier and keep working out.

I realize summer is a bad time to get too intense about anything. Which pretty much is life philosophy year round. But I’ve spent the last five days eating a bunch of junk and I feel gross. I need more fruit. Perhaps some vegetation, too.

And I’ve made so much progress at Smart Barre that I don’t want to lose momentum over the summer. This is going to be a little tricky due to scheduling and Caroline being out of school, but I’m going to try to make it work. Especially since I can make it through a whole class now by only whispering bad words every five minutes instead of three.

9. Get into my preferred schedule.

By which I mean staying up until 2 a.m. and sleeping until 10:00. It’s good to have at least one goal you know you’ll keep.

So those are some of my summer goals. What about you? Any grand ambitions? Small dreams? Hopes or plans? I’d love to know.

Comments are now closed! The winners are:

Random Integer Generator

Here are your random numbers:

789 368 600
Timestamp: 2013-06-04 22:22:58 UTC

Comment 789 – Beth S.

Comment 368 – Denice

Comment 600 – Nancy

I’ve emailed all three winners to let them know. Now the rest of you need to go buy a copy!

Y’all.

I couldn’t be more excited for today because it’s the day my friend Sophie’s first book comes out called A Little Salty to Cut the Sweet. I believe I may have mentioned it a time or two but that’s what happens when your friend does something wonderful and you’re just so proud.

Here’s the trailer for the book:

I love this book. Not just because Sophie wrote it, but because it’s warm and funny and tender. Sophie grew up in Mississippi and has lived in the South all her life and one of the things I loved about her from the start was listening to stories about her family and her friends and learning that a fish camp is an actual thing where they serve fried catfish and sweet tea.

This book will make you laugh and smile and want to call your grandma and tell her you love her. It will make you wipe away some tears one minute and clap your hands as you laugh the next.

I guarantee it.

And so today I am giving away three copies of A Little Salty to Cut the Sweet. But here’s the deal. I’m only leaving comments open until 5:00 p.m. and then I’ll post the three winners.

And then if you didn’t win, you’ll want to go buy the book and tell all your friends.

Well tomorrow is another school day. On the third of June.

I’m sure you can imagine my excitement.

So I just spent the weekend in Atlanta. In fact, I’m actually on my flight on the way home right this minute. I’d planned to watch a few more episodes of season two of Scandal, which is my current T.V. obsession, but forgot to download them on iTunes. Yet there was still hope because the plane has wi-fi and I thought I could watch them on Hulu.

Alas, it doesn’t appear that technology has come far enough to provide a sufficient signal to stream a television show at 10,000 feet. And so I’m having to resort to scratching this blog post on the side of my cave as I fly home instead of finding out what Olivia Pope is up to and how she’s going to fix whatever terrible dilemma someone finds themselves in the next episode.

But on the bright side, a woman next to me has a hacking cough so, fingers crossed, I may end up with a case of bronchitis before it’s all over.

Who says air travel isn’t as glamorous as it used to be? Other than maybe the man in front of me who has taken his shoes AND SOCKS off? God give me strength.

The weekend in Atlanta was great. I flew out on Friday morning and had two episodes of Scandal all downloaded to watch on the plane. Those were the good old days.

Sophie picked me up at the Atlanta airport and we went to meet one of my favorite people I’d never met in real life, Paige. She and her daughter, Savannah, met us for Mexican food at a restaurant that Paige clarified would never be her first choice for Mexican food, but she chose it merely for its close proximity to the hotel where Sophie and I were staying. And, honestly, the chips and salsa were pretty good. However, the decorative piping of sour cream across my quesadilla didn’t scream authenticity.

Paige and Savannah were as delightful as I hoped they would be and we all sat for a couple of hours laughing and talking about all manner of topics. Paige doesn’t realize that I’ve basically appointed her my mentor for all things involved in raising a daughter because she has four girls that are all older than Caroline. This may not be a task she would have chosen, but she’s stuck with me unless she changes her name and moves out of the country.

After a while it was time for Sophie and me to head over to the arena for Living Proof Live. It was so fun to see so many friends we hadn’t seen in a long time and, of course, Beth’s teaching was so great. There may be a time when I can articulate what this weekend meant to me and how God used it to encourage me and answer some questions I’ve had spinning around my head, but I’m still processing it all. So I’ll just say it was much needed.

On Friday night after LPL ended for the evening, Sophie and I decided we were a little hungry and wanted something to eat. We couldn’t really find anything that was still open and we just wanted something quick, so we ended up driving through McDonald’s. And let me tell you, a McDonald’s cheeseburger isn’t what it used to be. Which is saying something considering it wasn’t much to begin with. But it was the saddest thing I’ve seen or eaten in some time. Yet I ate it anyway. Let’s not speak of it again.

Here’s the thing about Sophie and me. We have a long track record of eating some truly subpar meals together. We used to travel together a lot more to various LifeWay events and it was a guarantee that if there was a bad restaurant in a fifty mile radius, we would find it and eat there. If you think I’m kidding then I’ll share we once ate at a Mexican restaurant in North Carolina that had a rat on its sign. And not a cute rat. As if there is such a thing.

So on Saturday night after everything was over, we decided to go in search of a good meal. When we checked the list of nearby restaurants the hotel had given us upon check-in, we realized the nicest thing listed was a Kentucky Fried Chicken or “KFC” as all the politically correct cool kids call it these days. And, no offense to the Colonel, but that wasn’t going to cut it. We had dreams of sitting at a table and placing an order with a real live person who would bring us our food.

We found a Pappadeauxs nearby but so had everyone else in the greater Atlanta area and thus we drove in search of an alternative that didn’t involve a drive-through window and ended up accidentally finding a good Italian restaurant complete with a lounge singer with a fondness for soft rock hits of the 70s. In other words, who needs Pappadeauxs when you find a place where the hostess is also the singer and likes pina coladas and getting caught in the rain?

And now I’m finally home and sitting on my couch. I realize earlier I said I was still on the plane and at that point I was but then I had to power down my electronic devices and stow my carry on items. I also had to listen to the hacking lady next to me bicker with her husband like they were Frank and Estelle Costanza. Good times.

So that was the weekend. Now I’m going to wash the plane off me and crawl into my own bed.

It’s good to be home.

So by the time most of you read this I’ll be on a flight to Atlanta for the weekend. I’m meeting Sophie there and we’re going to Living Proof Live to see Beth Moore. And I really can’t express how I excited I am about the whole thing.

We’d planned this trip months ago, but I had no idea it would be such perfect timing to get away for the weekend.

Speaking of Sophie, her first book releases this coming Tuesday, June 4th. It’s called A Little Salty to Cut the Sweet and I promise you will love it. The perfect book to take to the pool or beach this summer and laugh your head off.

And I also should mention that the audio version of Sparkly Green Earrings is now available. You can also order it from Amazon if that’s your preference. I can’t promise you won’t wish for subtitles to understand my Texas accent.

Anyway, I still need to finish packing and figure out my hair strategy for the weekend. I realize some of you don’t understand what I mean by hair strategy so I will tell you. The humidity here right now is about 280% which is even the best head of hair’s total nemesis.

And so my dilemma is whether I should wash and dry my hair tonight and wait to curl it right before I leave for the airport? Or do I wait until morning risking that it will be so humid that it will take forever to dry and I won’t have time to curl it?

I know. It’s a real problem.

I’d appreciate your prayers.

Now for some cute things I’ve seen this week.

1. tiled mosaic shorts

I think these are super cute if you’re into shorts for the summer. And they have a four inch inseam which means they’re a little longer than some other printed shorts I’ve seen that can only be worn by Barbie dolls or people who don’t eat cheese.

2. milkshake bow wedge green sandals

These are precious. If you’ve ever thought you might need some green shoes – and who hasn’t? – these are for you.

3. pattern gather shell

I just think this is really pretty.

4. old navy denim cutoff shorts

Y’all. I have been on an extensive cutoff journey. It has taken me to many dressing rooms and some dark places in my mind as I’ve weighed the pros and cons of various styles, shapes, and inseam lengths. Last Friday night I even cut off two pairs of old jeans to make cutoffs of my own.

But if you’re afraid of that option and still want cutoffs? These denim ones from Old Navy have been my favorites. Bonus? They’re only $15.

Sadly, the colored options at Old Navy aren’t as great. I’m not sure why there is such a denim discrepancy between the colored and the regular, but it’s a real thing. The colored ones feel cheap and have no stretch.

5. sunday in brooklyn top

This is a cute summer top. And it comes in blue too.

6. botanical print chiffon top

I have long coveted a similar top from Free People but have never been able to justify the price tag. But I saw this at Forever 21 and it’s very close to the original but a 1/4 of the price. Which is a good thing.

7. jade boho rings

How pretty are these for summer? Love the colors. They’re like sherbet. Which I always think should be spelled “sherbert” since that’s the way I say it because I am very sophisticated.

8. callisto brayden sandals

I adore these. Mainly because I’m a fan of any shoe that doesn’t have a strap that has to be buckled.

9. michael kors chain bracelet watch

Yesterday the girl who cuts my hair had on this watch and I fell madly in love with it and tried to steal it off her arm. Which was awkward.

(I didn’t really try to steal it off her arm but I thought about it.)

10. geo print maxi skirt

I saw this in Gap this week and thought it was cute. I’m a fan of a geometric pattern.

That’s it for this week.

Y’all have a good Friday.