Author: Big Mama

  • Fashion Friday: Edition how hard is it to put on some real pants

    Today is the day that I am going to speak some truth in love.

    Several people sent me a link this week to something called Pajama Jeans.

    Their slogan is “Pajamas you live in, jeans you sleep in”.

    I am all for some comfortable clothing, but that is just wrong. Pajamas are for sleeping and for wearing when you drive school carpool in the morning. That’s it.

    I’m just concerned that we’ve reached a point in society where we feel like we need a casual alternative to jeans. Gulley reminded me this week that I called her several years ago to discuss my disbelief that grocery stores were actually selling frozen, pre-made peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. At the time, I honestly believed that America had reached the pinnacle of laziness. After all, how hard is it to slap some peanut butter and jelly on a piece of bread and call it a day?

    But now I’m wondering how hard is it to put on some pants that require a button and a zipper?

    We’re better than this, America.

    We’re better than this.

    Although I have to admit that I saw several commercials for the Hoodie Footie yesterday while P was watching Nascar (we lead a rich life) and maybe it was just because it was freezing cold and rainy outside, but I found myself wishing for my very own Hoodie Footie.

    Needless to say, I wouldn’t wear it in public.

    Or try to pretend like it could take the place of an actual outfit, although that hood is kickin’.

    I just think if you can’t muster the strength to put on a pair of real pants then maybe you should just stay in your pajamas, eat a block of cheese, and admit that you’ve given up on life.

    It’s a harsh word, but I say it with love. LOVE.

    1. V-neck sweater

    Remember how I’ve repeatedly mentioned trying to replicate this look that looks like an outfit Sandra Bullock wore in The Proposal?

    So I found the grey stripy scarf at Old Navy, but hadn’t really found the right sweater. But then Lindsee sent me the link to this coral sweater from Land’s End and it’s pretty darn close.

    Now if I could just get my hair to look like Sandra Bullock’s hair. Too bad there isn’t a link for that.

    2. Chambray Drop-Waist Shirt Dress

    My friend Steph told me about this dress this week. I think it would be so cute with black leggings while the weather is still cooler or with some cute sandals and bare legs once the sun decides to show up again.

    3. Ode to a Grecian Tunic

    I have no idea where I’d wear this or how many pushups I’d need to do to get my arms in shape to wear it, but I think it is so cute.

    4. Tiered Printed Skirts

    I can’t remember if it was last summer or the summer before that I declared it to be the summer of the skirt, but I do know that these are the perfect skirts for Spring and Summer. They are great with a cute tank or a t-shirt.

    5. Embellished Linen Blend Dress

    I saw this dress in an email I got from Nordstrom this week and fell in love with it.

    However, right now I’d need about eight coats of spray tan for that yellow color to not make me look like I have the jaundice.

    6. Princess ring

    This ring is so soft and pretty. Love it.

    7. Pintucked tunic top

    I linked to this on my Daily Links page earlier this week because it is the kind of top that I adore. I’d wear it all summer long with turquoise jewelry.

    8. Embroidery Tunic

    I think this would look great with jeans.

    9. Studded Circles Cuff

    My love for bracelets tends to run hot and cold. On the one hand (I’m so sorry) I love the way they look, but on the other hand (Could not be sorrier) they can drive me crazy with all the moving up and down on my arm.

    But this one might be worth it.

    10. Woven trim ruffle tank

    This would look great with a cute skirt and a denim jacket over it. Or even just by itself.

    Of course considering it was 34 degrees and rainy here yesterday, I probably won’t be wearing it anytime soon. Or I may be wearing it next week because it’s Texas and it might be 80.

    For more fashion, you can visit Jo-Lynne at Musings of a Housewife.

    Y’all have a great Friday.

  • Everything but the kitchen sink

    About seven years ago, we did some renovations on our house. And by we, I mean that P contracted the entire job and worked tirelessly to make sure everything turned out the way we wanted while I cried every night because I was worried that the house wouldn’t be ready on time and OH MY WORD what if we have to bring our new baby home to this rental house instead of her new pink nursery?

    I’d like to blame pregnancy hormones on all the obsessing over when the house would be finished, but I know I’d act the same way tomorrow except I wouldn’t be able to sing a chorus of “In the Ghetto” by Elvis Presley to drive home my point because the words “and a baby cries…in the ghetto” wouldn’t have the same impact now that the baby is six years old.

    We moved back into the house exactly two weeks before Caroline was born, in spite of the fact that we had no kitchen countertops or any other necessary components that make up a kitchen but we had the pink nursery and that’s all that really mattered. Who needs an oven when you have darling whimsical letters that spell CAROLINE hanging on a pink wall and a fresh, white crib that the baby won’t actually sleep in for several months?

    The countertops were finally installed the day before I went into labor along with the sink and the kitchen faucet. Everything was installed, the baby was born, and, approximately one week later, the sprayer component of our new faucet quit working. Actually, that’s not totally true. It worked fine if you didn’t mind the fact that it got stuck and would randomly decide to spew water all over the kitchen. It created a surprisingly non-hilarious situation when you factor in a newborn baby and sleep-deprivation. The kind of situation that is like shaking up a bottle of crazy sauce and then watching it explode.

    Ultimately, P worked his plumbing magic to unhook the sprayer and so it has remained a non-functioning component of our sink for the last six and a half years.

    Until he decided on Tuesday morning that TODAY WAS THE DAY to fix the sprayer. I don’t know why it was the day because I don’t bother to ask those kinds of questions. Why is the sky blue? Why do people watch Jay Leno? Why does Lionel Richie never age? JUST BECAUSE.

    All I know is that he asked me to help him get everything out from under our kitchen sink and our kitchen looked like this.

    It has continued to look like that for the past 48 hours. I try not to look directly at it because that would be like throwing a match on a powder keg just to see if it would explode. It would. It totally would.

    And it certainly doesn’t help matters that, in addition to being a haven for amateur plumbers, my house has been transformed into some sort of Valentine’s Day sweat shop. Caroline’s only homework for the week was to sign her name on Valentine’s cards for everyone in her class. But, OH NO, she wanted to hand make her cards and write “Happy Valentine’s Day! Love, Caroline” inside every single one. It was barrels of fun for the first two cards, but quickly became some kind of Hallmark factory gone awry as I stood over her and insisted that WE MUST CONTINUE TO MAKE THE CARDS. YOU CAN HAVE A SNACK WHEN YOU FINISH ANOTHER CARD.

    But oh she is SO TIRED of shaking the silver glitter. It’s exhausting.

    Anyway, P wasn’t sure that he was going to be able to fix the existing faucet because the something was leaking into the something and the bottom line is that my new bag of Pledge Grab-its got damp along with our last roll of Viva paper towels. I was out running errands to distract myself from the plumbing when he called and asked me to meet him at Home Depot so I could pick out a new faucet.

    I don’t go to Home Depot very often because it is my kryptonite. One loop around Home Depot and I begin to dream about new toilet seats, granite countertops, and fancy showerheads that make you feel like it’s raining on the inside. (Shout out to Amy Grant) But I met P on the kitchen faucet aisle and found a faucet I liked. He asked, “Do you want to go ahead and buy it or do you want to see if I can fix our existing one?”

    “I don’t know. I really like this one but I’m not sure it will work if we end up getting granite countertops and a farmhouse sink.”

    “Well, realistically speaking, in light of all our other financial obligations, I don’t really see that there’s going to be a time when we’ll spend money on granite countertops and a whatever-you-just-said sink.”

    Why does my husband want to kill my dreams of granite countertops and a farmhouse sink on Aisle 6 at Home Depot?

    So I said, “I don’t want the new one. Just see if you can fix the old one.” And then I walked out of the store and past the granite displays with a wistful glance.

    He bought approximately 782 parts that were supposed to fix the sink, but none of them worked. I went back to Home Depot yesterday and bought the new faucet. Which I actually really love because it’s got the sprayer thingy that pulls right out of the faucet and, yes, that’s exactly how it was described on the box. It’s pretty and shiny.

    And it would look great on a farmhouse sink.

  • The tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth

    The night after we discovered Caroline’s first tooth was loose, I was helping her get dressed for bed when she asked me how long I thought it would be before the tooth next to her loose tooth became loose. I said, “Well, it probably won’t be too long because I can see the permanent teeth trying to come in. What usually happens is the permanent teeth push the baby teeth out of the way and that’s why they get loose. I bet that other tooth will be loose in no time.”

    “Wow, Mama. Did you used to be a dentist?”

    “No, I was never a dentist.”

    “Then I guess you don’t really know then, do you?”

    And she’s right. I had no idea what I was talking about or if any of it was even true. I just like to spout random pieces of trivia based on what sounds good. I’ve been doing it for years. It was a skill that served me very well throughout all the years I worked as a pharmaceutical rep. But my child totally called me on it.

    When I picked her up from school yesterday, she walked out of the building with a HUGE smile on her face. A smile that revealed a little gap where her tooth used to be.

    The Lost Tooth from Big Mama on Vimeo.

    I have to make a few comments:

    1. She is a fan of the extreme close up shot. We probably need to work on personal space.

    2. I’m not totally sure that it was the first tooth she ever “growed”, but she liked the symmetry of that story so I’m sticking to it.

    3. I know who Tilt is but I’m not sure when Caroline decided it was okay to drop the “Mrs.” from the name. Or if her name is even Tilt.

    4. I do know that she was DYING for Tilt to pull the tooth and had mentioned it several times. Apparently, Tilt is the Mr. Miyagi of tooth-pulling up at the school.

    5. I think she’s going to be disappointed to discover that her tooth fairy isn’t a high roller who throws around ten dollar bills like the tooth fairy at Trevor’s house. His tooth fairy probably drives a miniature Escalade and makes extra cash selling baby teeth on the black market.

  • All shiny and new

    Do you love the new look? Because I LOVE the new look.

    And if you’re reading this in your feedreader then you need to make the    extra effort to click over here and see the new design. (You don’t really have to. I don’t want to be pushy.) Of course if you always read from your feedreader then you may not even know what the old design looked like. But pretend you’re excited anyway.

    I have known for a long time, deep in my heart, that I was ready for a new design for the blog, but didn’t know exactly what I wanted. I had some vague ideas, but no real concrete plan. Which is basically how I go through life.

    Sometime around mid-December, I emailed Cathy at Desperately Seeking WordPress and asked if she’d be interested in helping me work on a new blog design. What I failed to mention were all my obsessive tendencies and complete inability to use helpful adjectives in describing what I wanted it to look like.

    So, bless her heart, she said she’d love to help me and put me on her design calendar for mid-January.

    You don’t even want to know how many emails we’ve exchanged since then, but I have a feeling that Cathy feels significantly older than she did when she started this process because these are some real live excerpts from my emails to her:

    “I found this painting that I love. Can we make it look like this, but without the British flag?”

    (It looks nothing like the painting in question. And that’s a good thing.)

    “I think I want the letters to be a peacock blue, but not too bright. Like maybe a soft peacock blue?”

    (Soft peacock blue? I hope she rolled her eyes when she read that.)

    What’s the thing that shows up in your browser bar? You know? That thing that looks like something?

    (The answer is a favicon. I’m going to have one.)

    “I don’t know. I can’t decide. Will you decide for me? I have issues about making decisions.”

    (Yes, will you please code and design everything and make all my decisions?)

    Ultimately, Cathy used a graphic that I sent her way back in December and we worked together on all the other aspects until it was something that we both loved. She was so great about making suggestions that I wouldn’t have thought about or even known that I should think about, but added so much to the final design and feel. I wanted something that was simple and clean, but still pretty. I wanted something that felt like me. And this is it.

    Seriously, I can’t thank Cathy enough for her endless patience and design sensibilities. She is a peach.

    (However, peach wasn’t a color I wanted on my blog. Just some soft peacock blue.)

    In other news, we received our new receiver from Dish Network yesterday and I had to spend an hour of my life that I’ll never get back trying to program the new receiver with our remote control. Then, to add insult to technological injury, I still had to call Dish Network customer service so they could verify our new receiver and help me figure out why the T.V. in our bedroom wasn’t working.

    Honestly, they don’t make a bottle of Valium large enough to help me through that kind of situation. At one point the girl asked, “Can you find your RS0009 code?” and I said, “Is that even a real thing or are you just messing with me? And, while you have me on the phone, can I help you with any free tax advice?”

    Fortunately we got it all working because I would have had to crack some skulls, or at least talked to someone in a not very nice voice, if the DVR wasn’t up and running in time for a T.V. lineup that I like to refer to as Majestic Monday.

    And. lastly, look who still has all their teeth.

    Her loose tooth is bothering her so much that she couldn’t even eat her broccoli last night. Although, miraculously, she managed to eat all the Doritos I sent in her lunch.

    Note to self: Call and schedule a haircut appointment for your child.

  • I could see clearly now until the clouds came back

    Friday started out like a normal day. I dropped Caroline off at school, came home and got back in bed with a cup of hot choffee (Half hot chocolate, half coffee. Trademark pending.) and waited for Regis and Kelly to come on. This is what my bout with SAD has done to me. It has led me down a dark road that causes me to turn on bad morning television because how am I supposed to leave the house and accomplish anything when it’s cold and rainy outside?

    But right about the time I finished my choffee (trademark pending), I saw a strange light flooding in through my bedroom windows. And in the words of the oath I recited during my sorority pledge presentation in college, LO, THE SUN.

    All of a sudden I turned back into a productive member of society assuming that the sign of a productive society member is someone who cleans their bathrooms, vacuums their rugs, sweeps the wood floors, showers, blow dries their hair and gets dressed in something other than velour sweatpants and a sweatshirt that reads “Texas Aggie Football 1993”.

    (Sadly, 1993 was about the last time Aggie football was good and that is why I hold on to the shirt.)

    And, yes, I realize I could have cleaned the bathrooms during my bout with SAD/becoming a hermit, but I kept thinking my maid was going to show up until I realized I don’t have a maid. Which just caused me to fall further into depression.

    But the sun turned it all around for me. I felt like a new person, a person with dreams, goals, and ambitions! Well, maybe I’m getting carried away. It was the sun, not Zig Ziglar.

    Speaking of Zig Ziglar, when I began my first job out of college, an ill-advised foray into financial sales, the company paid for me to attend a motivational seminar featuring a variety of speakers who were supposed to get you FIRED UP about life and your career. It totally worked and I left the Alamodome determined to be the best financial salesperson I could be despite my inability to balance my own checkbook. But then the O.J. Simpson trial started and I was powerless to do anything except watch the trial while I ate Ruffles potato chips dipped in ranch dressing. So you can add the death of my financial career to O.J.’s long list of crimes.

    Anyway, the sun stayed out all day Friday and, much to my delight, showed up again on Saturday. P had to work all day Saturday because the rain has caused them to fall behind on a lot of jobs, but Caroline and I spent most of the day outside just soaking up the sun. After a winter full of nothing but gray skies, I’m afraid this may be the summer that I officially veer over into George Hamilton territory. But I have to remember that a sunny 70 degree day feels differently than a sunny 105 degree day. I’m sure MaMaw will pull out her sun hat by the time June hits.

    Sunday morning decided to be a buzzkill and showed up with clouds and some drizzle. Caroline and I are both suffering from a lot of congestion and a chronic hacking cough so we stayed home from church, but she was invited to a birthday party later in the day. After the party, she came home and was looking through the party favor bag and found a candy necklace. Clearly there is nothing more precious to a six year old girl than an accessory made of processed sugar.

    She took a bite of it and got a funny look on her face. I asked, “What’s wrong?” and she said, “I THINK MY TOOTH IS LOOSE.”

    I wasn’t sure if I believed her because we’ve had loose tooth false alarms several times that have just turned out to be a wayward piece of Chex Mix, but, sure enough, one of her bottom teeth is officially loose. I’m not sure if it was loose before she bit into the candy necklace or if the candy necklace was the perpetrator, but whatever. She finally has a tooth to wiggle after years of bemoaning her dental misfortune.

    And that’s all we heard about the rest of the day.

    She wasn’t sure if she could put up her clean clothes because of her loose tooth. She didn’t know if she could carry her plate to the sink because of her loose tooth. She could hardly eat her tomato soup and grilled cheese sandwich because of her loose tooth. A tooth, by the way, that is less than half the size of my pinky nail.

    When I tucked her into bed she thought she might need some Tylenol to help with the pain of her loose tooth and definitely needed a lullaby because of THE LOOSE TOOTH.

    Honestly, where does she get the drama? Doesn’t she know there are real people, LIKE HER MOTHER, who are suffering from serious things like SAD?

    But I sang her the lullaby because I knew it would make her smile. And I don’t know how many days we have left of that little smile that looks like baby Chiclets all lined up in a row.

    They’ll be gone like the sun before I know it.

  • Fashion Friday: Edition I think I might have SAD

    I don’t know that I went into one single store this week unless you count the four trips I’ve made to HEB. It has rained and rained for days. And I have mentioned the rain?

    I’ve spent most of my time trying to avoid leaving the house unless it’s absolutely necessary. Hence the trips to HEB because P and Caroline tend to be high-maintenance and want frivolous things like “lunch” and “dinner”.

    The worst part is I’m pretty sure if I don’t see the sun in the next few days that I’m going to develop a raging case of Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) if I’m not there already. And guess what the forecast calls for next week?

    More rain.

    And possibly some ice.

    Which is why I’ve been searching the internet for raincoats for Caroline and me. P bought himself a new raincoat from Cabelas last fall because he believed the meteorologists when they said it was going to be a wet winter while I tended to fall into the I’ll-believe-it-when-I-see-it-because-weathermen-are-big-fat-liars category. Unfortunately this strategy backfired on me.

    And I can’t really discuss the super cute raincoat that was way on sale at Boden last spring that I didn’t buy because it hadn’t rained in San Antonio in two years and why would I need a raincoat when I live in a desert?

    I still haven’t ordered a raincoat for myself, but I found this darling one for Caroline along with some matching rainboots. Too bad it doesn’t come in my size.

    Although I’d be perfectly happy with this darling hot pink one from Boden. Maybe it will go on sale so I can buy it thus ensuring that it will never rain in San Antonio again.

    Anyway, I thought I’d answer some questions today since I really haven’t been out in the stores and all my online shopping has been dedicated to the pursuit of rainwear.

    1. Commamama asked: “I was wondering if you could recommend a fashionable, small cross-body handbag (I spent a long time with my friend Google figuring out what to even call the object of my quest). Right now, I carry a glorified wallet on a string, and it isn’t pretty, though it does contain at least one dart from the recent Nerf toy Happy Meal series.”

    You would be horrified if you saw the size of the purse I carry everyday. It really is just one step shy of a duffle bag. But it comes in handy on the days I decide to carry around my home phone. And someday there will be a lucky chiropractor who will profit from my need to carry around everything I own on my shoulder.

    But if I decided to downsize and be sensible, then I would probably opt for something like this Betty Bag. It’s practical and cute all at the same time.

    Or you could go with something like the No Mad or Saddle Satchel Kavu bag.

    OH WAIT. I was just looking at Piperlime for something else and saw this ADORABLE Orla Kiely sling bag. I realize it’s probably bigger than what you are wanting but OH MY WORD at the cuteness.

    2. Judith asked: “I’m going to the beach with my boyfriend’s family over spring break. Can you recommend any modest cover-ups or swim shorts to wear over my swimsuit? Any other spring fashion tips? What style flip-flops or sandals are in this year?”

    Oh the beach. I would like to go to there.

    Okay, a trip with the boyfriend’s family is kind of a big deal. Am I wrong? It seems like a big deal, but what do I know? The last time I had a boyfriend was thirteen years ago and I married him.

    Victoria’s Secret is a great place to look for swimsuit coverups because they have a wide variety of styles and coverage. I love this ruffled kaftan, strapless smocked dress, and off-the-shoulder tee dress. They also have some cute cropped cotton cargo pants and smocked gauze shorts that you could throw on over your swimsuit with a tee or tank.

    Athleta has the Surf Side Kurta that I have long adored and also this tunic-length rashguard that can be cinched up as much or as little as you want.

    As for sandals, there are so many great options. You can never go wrong with your basic flip-flop, but you could also look for something with a little extra something like these with a little peony or with a fun print. You can’t go wrong with just a simple t-strap sandal
     or maybe something with a wedge heel if you want a little height. I believe my love of the the wedge heel is well-documented.

    Hope you have fun and, if you get a chance, mail me a picture of the sun. I can’t remember what it looks like.

    3. Jayde asked: “I want to wear the tall boats but I need to know how and you can’t just tell me you have to show me. I work in a corporate setting and not sure what’s appropriate for work as far as boots go.”

    The sad news is that I took to long to answer this question and I can’t find any pictures on the world wide web to show you some great looks with boots in a corporate setting, but I’ll do my best to help you out since you shouldn’t have to pay for my extreme procrastination.

    Since you work in a corporate setting, I’d recommend investing in a good pair of black boots with or without a heel depending on our preference. Corporate America thrives on the color black so it’s a safe bet you’ll be able to find plenty of clothing options to pair with your boots.

    You can wear them with tights and a shift dress or a skirt. They’d also look great with a classic wrap dress or worn under your favorite pair of dress pants as long as you choose a style that’s dressy enough.

    And the best part is that a great pair of boots can easily transition into your casual outfits as well. They’re the fashion gift that keeps on giving.

    That’s all for today. I’m off to see if I can find some sort of Vitamin D supplement or a tanning bed.

    Y’all have a great Friday.