Author: Big Mama

Night of the living scaredy cat

Honestly, I’m glad Halloween is over. It’s not that I don’t love the costumes, the candy, carving pumpkins, and the candy, but I am a pansy. You may wonder what that has to do with anything and I’ll tell you. All the scary movies that come on T.V. the week before Halloween are my nemesis. I cannot stand scary movies. I’ll be as bold to say they are worse than stirrup pants and pet guinea pigs.

There is nothing that ruins my television viewing experience like flipping through the channels and inadvertently stumbling upon Halloween 12: The Repeated Revenge of Michael Myers. The worst part is P loves a good scary movie because they don’t scare him at all. He enjoys dissecting the movie into all the different reasons it’s an implausible story line with the number one reason being that if there’s a deranged killer on the loose then why isn’t anyone carrying a gun? Says the man who plays pool while wearing a sidearm.

All I know is that he talked me into watching some terrible movie called Urban Legend a few years ago under the guise that it was so stupid that even I couldn’t be scared and I didn’t sleep for a week afterwards. Oh, and the time that we watched Sixth Sense and it freaked me out so bad that I put the DVD back in its case and put it outside. Because that’s normal.

I’m a pansy. I own it.

Nevertheless, we had a great Halloween filled with nothing much scarier than a southern belle who referred to herself as “Scarlett O’Harris” and a gladiator.

Unfortunately, I spent the rest of the weekend not feeling very well. I don’t want to say it was all the Reeses I ate, so I’ll blame the Butterfingers instead.
Happy Halloween

I’m not sure how we went from this:

to this:

But I’m pretty sure it happened when I blinked my eyes.

May your Halloween be filled with all manner of ducks, southern belles, and especially Reeses Peanut Butter Cups.

However, if you come to my house don’t have your heart set on the Reeses.

They were gone like the wind.
Edition 72: Fashion Friday

We had a big day yesterday, complete with our first gymnastics class and a makeup soccer game for the mighty Rainbows. It actually wasn’t our very first gymnastics class, but rather our first gymnastics class of the year. I thought we were done with gymnastics but we are in the midst of a gymnastics resurgence that I like to refer to as our gymnaissance.

On the plus side, our double-header of activities will only last one more week until soccer season ends. On the minus side, I was so tired by the time the afternoon was over that I went to dig the Reeses Peanut Butter Cups intended for trick-or-treaters off the top laundry room shelf where I hid them from myself and managed to cause a full package of assorted candy bars to fall on my head.

Unfortunately I didn’t let my head injury keep me from indulging in a peanut butter cup or two. Or five.

But let’s not focus on that because that’s not what today is about. Today is all about the winter coat and/or jacket. I have a deep, ongoing love affair with the jacket as evidenced by the many, many jackets I have collected over the years. Whenever I do my semi-annual closet cleanout, I can make myself get rid of many a clothing item, but never a jacket or a coat.

Which explains the cranberry red wool peacoat in my closet that I bought in 1997 and the denim trenchcoat with a faux fur collar that I bought when Gulley and I took a trip to New York in 2002. It’s not that I ever really wear either of them (I think the red peacoat has shoulder pads) but I can’t bear to let them go.

So here is my list of ten great coats/jackets for this season. As you look at the ones I love, please keep in mind that I live in a climate akin to the center of the equator. Which is to say, some of these coats may not keep you very warm, but they will keep you very fashionable.

And isn’t that the most important thing?

1. Park Avenue Coat

I just think this is the cutest thing. Plus it’s the pick of the week at Francescas and that means it’s on sale. Just think how great it would look with jeans and boots or even all dressed up with a black pencil skirt or pants.

And you seriously have to give some credit to the houndstooth print because it has some staying power. I’ve had something houndstooth in my closet for the last thirty-something years. It’s a classic.

2. Effortless Velvet Coat

If you don’t want to covet then don’t look at this coat. It is a delight and a wonder. It’s an effortless velvet coat.

Sophie called me last week and told me her best friend, EK, had this coat on at the Mississippi State game and it was totally fab. This is that coat.

And it’s totally fab.

The only problem is that Boden makes my bank account sad.

3. Hailey Plaid Coat

I know I’ve linked to approximately 452 variations of the plaid coat this fall, but I am a fan of the plaid coat and I don’t care who knows it.

4. Aeryn Double Breasted Cashmere Coat

A few years back we had to attend an outdoor wedding on one of the coldest December nights I can remember. I didn’t have a warm, dressy coat so Mimi let me borrow her black cashmere coat and it was one of the greatest experiences of my life. It was like being wrapped in buttah.

Although being wrapped in butter would probably feel kind of gross and that’s not how this felt at all. It felt like a warm hug made of fairy dust and bunny tails.

5. Double Breasted Ruffle Coat

I don’t mean to get political, but I am of the belief that you can’t go wrong with a ruffle on a coat.

6. Birling Ruffle Coat

While I am a little on the fence about the staying power of the red and black checked combo, I adore the style of this jacket. It may not be for everyone but if you are a frilly kind of girl with a penchant for wearing patterns favored by lumberjacks everywhere, then I think this may be your coat.

7. From Russia, With Love Coat

This is just a great classic coat. Love the chocolate brown. Love the faux fur collar. Love the cut.

8. Cloud Spotter Mac

Late this summer, Boden marked down their raincoats to 75% off and I almost bought one about a million times. It was like a daily obsession to go see if they still had my size available. And then once I knew that it was there and available, I was content to just leave it in the online cart and put off making a commitment.

Somewhere in the above paragraph is a metaphor for my late teens and early twenties, but I’m going to ignore it.

The point is that I never ordered the coat because it hadn’t rained in two years and it seemed frivolous to order a raincoat even if it was 75% off. And, I kid you not, since the day they ran out of my size in the on sale raincoat it has rained about 15 inches. Shopping FAIL.

Anyway, this raincoat is darling and I truly hope it goes on sale because, in the words of The Who, I won’t be fooled again.

9. Leopard Fur Coat

I hate to bring you down on a Friday with my tale of woe but I’m going to do it anyway.

Years and years ago, I bought this unbelievably darling leopard fur coat. I just happened to spy it in the window of some totally cheesy store at the mall. (I want to say it was Chess King, but even I have my limits. It may have been a Merry-Go-Round.) As if led by the sweet hand of destiny, I went in the store, tried on the coat, and discovered it was only $49.99.

I loved that coat.

Then I attended a baby shower at some upscale restaurant in downtown Austin and, while I was inside ooohing an aaahing over some blue satin blankets and pacifiers, some hoodlums smashed out the window of my sweet white Ford Taurus (company car) and stole my leopard jacket. And also all my makeup and a leather jacket from Harolds. Needless to say, it was tragic.

And I learned that insurance cannot replace a $49.99 leopard fur coat from a cheesy mall store.

10. Faux Suede and Shearling Coat

I am so tempted to tell you about the beautiful faux suede coat that I bought years ago at Wet Seal, but I really need to quit admitting that I actually shop in those stores on occasion. I’m just millimeters away from uttering the phrase, “When I was looking around at Hot Topic the other day…”

Anyway, I love this coat. I have always been a fan of suede and shearling paired together because it’s just that whole Western-influenced style that I adore. This would look so great with a pair of jeans, some cowboy boots and gorgeous turquoise jewelry.

And that’s a wrap.

Or a coat or whatever.

I also want to add that you can find some really great bargains on coats and/or jackets at TJ Maxx, Marshalls and places like that but I am limited to showing you things I can find online. So let this just serve as a guideline, if you will, to help you find the coat that best suits your needs.

If all else fails, you can always go see what they have in stock at Journeyz.
A giveaway and the best dip ever

Before I write anything else, I need to let you know that there is a brand new giveaway on my Giveaway page. And it’s good. It’s so, so good and just in time for the Christmas season.

On a totally different note, I’d totally planned to wait and post the fabulous dip recipe after I actually made it so I could include an incredibly below average photographed tutorial to go along with it. There is nothing I enjoy more than some blurry photography in a poorly lit environment.

But then I realized that you wouldn’t be able to make the dip for any Halloween festivities that you may have planned for Saturday night and that would be a tragedy. I mean, not a real tragedy like when you get your bangs cut too short or get a little overzealous while plucking your eyebrows, but the kind of tragedy where you’d be forced to serve your guests some Hidden Valley ranch dip instead of something exciting and new.

(Not that there’s anything wrong with Hidden Valley ranch dip. I find it delicious with tortilla chips, french fries, vegetables and even air.)

So here’s the dip recipe:

Sweet Ancho Chile Relish Dip

16 oz. cream cheese, softened (I use 1/3 less fat because I’m delusional)
1 jar of Jim Severson Ancho Chile Relish (available at HEB stores, otherwise you might have to order it off the internet)
6-8 slices of bacon, cooked and crumbled
3-4 green onions, chopped

Spread softened cream cheese on a small plate, pour the Sweet Ancho Chile Relish over the top (probably about half the jar). Top it with fried, crumbled bacon pieces and green onions. Serve with crackers.

It is beyond delightful and so easy.

Also, I just want to dispel any rumors that this has turned into a cooking blog since I’ve posted recipes two days in a row.

(Not that any one has started those rumors but I like to be proactive)

It’s still very much a blog about absolutely nothing. I take that responsibility very seriously.

Okay, now go check out the giveaway!

***Don’t leave your comment to enter the giveaway on this post. Leave it in the comments on the giveaway page.
Represent with some tortilla soup

On Monday it was cold and rainy here. The kind of cold and rainy that inspired P and I to go eat breakfast at our favorite little breakfast place after he dropped Caroline off at school. Of course it also may have had something to do with the fact that he opened up the refrigerator and discovered we were out of eggs. I’d used our last egg the night before when I offered to make ham and eggs for Caroline for dinner and then had to inform her that it was just going to be ham and egg. Singular.

He was all fired up for a good breakfast and that’s a hard thing to come by when you’re out of eggs. And bacon. And basically any manner of food items that pass for breakfast food when you consider that I gave up eating frozen pizzas for breakfast shortly after college.

So we went out for breakfast, drank coffee and watched the monsoon outside. All the rain made me lament the fact that I am not the owner of some super cute rainboots. Granted, since I live somewhere that’s experienced record drought conditions for the last two years, buying rainboots fell pretty far down on my to-do list. Right behind getting a pet ferret and painting the trim in the master bath that’s been bare for six years.

I suggested to P that we go to Target after breakfast because I could get rainboots, he could get a raincoat, and we could buy enough groceries to get us through until I could make it to HEB. To my complete and utter shock, he agreed on the trip to Target. We ran through the rain, got in the car, and he looked at me and asked, “Where’s Target?”

It’s like we are two strangers living under the same roof.

Once we made it there, I immediately found an umbrella but, alas, they had no rainboots or rain coats. Oh Target, how you disappoint me on occasion. We headed to the grocery section where, I kid you not, P put three cases of water, six boxes of granola bars, and five things of Degree Antiperspirant for men in our cart. And I vowed then and there to never allow him to see the inside of a Sam’s Club. He is powerless to resist discount pricing.

Anyway, once we got back in from the cold and rain without new rainboots or rain coats, I began to seriously crave some tortillas soup. And, sure, I live in San Antonio and I could get tortilla soup at about twelve different restaurants in a three mile radius, but I wanted to make homemade tortilla soup.

So I did exactly what Caroline Ingalls would have done back in the olden days and twittered (sent out a tweet? tweeted?) asking if anyone had a good recipe for tortilla soup.

And anyone who says technology isn’t useful is wrong because I suddenly found myself with dozens upon dozens of tortilla soup recipes to choose from. Thank you, internet.

(Does anyone claim that technology isn’t useful? Other than maybe the Amish? Who obviously don’t care about eating great tortilla soup?)

My original plan was to eventually make all the various recipes and report the results here because who doesn’t love a tortilla soup taste test? I mean other than the Amish and people who think technology isn’t useful?

But then last night I made the recipe that Antique Mommy emailed to me. It’s a recipe for the tortilla soup the chef makes at The Mansion at Turtle Creek in Dallas. I chose to make it first for two reasons:

1. The Mansion is a really nice restaurant and people in Dallas aren’t going to put up with some slop disguised as tortilla soup.

2. The recipe contains tomato puree which told me that the finished product would be reddish-orange in color which is exactly what I have spent my life, or at least Monday afternoon, hoping to find. I didn’t want just a bowl of chicken broth with a few sad pieces of avocado floating in it.

So I made it last night and, honestly, I don’t know that I’ll ever make another tortilla soup because there is no way that any of them will compare with this one. P ate three bowls of it and y’all know he never does anything to excess except for purchasing cases of bottled water, car wash supplies, Degree deodorant, Kashi granola bars, York Peppermint Patties, and any sort of weaponry and ammunition.

All that to say, I’m sharing the recipe with you because it is delicious and easy and it may have changed my life a little bit. None of which can be said about owning a pet ferret.

Tortilla Soup from The Mansion

3 tablespoons olive oil
4-6 corn tortillas, diced
1 tablespoon of minced garlic
4-5 tablespoons of chopped cilantro (I used a little less because cilantro and I are on sketchy terms)
1 tablespoon of cumin
2 tablespoons of chili powder

Saute all of the above until tortillas begin to crisp.

It will look like this:

Add the following to the above and simmer.

1 cup onion puree (per Antique Mommy, I diced a small onion and pureed it in the food processor)
1 large can (29 oz) of tomato puree
2 quarts of chicken stock
Salt and Pepper to taste
Cayenne Pepper to taste (I went with a fair amount of cayenne because we aren’t a bunch of Nancy boys)

To serve: top with any or all of the following: diced grilled or baked chicken, avocado, shredded cheese, crisp fried strips of corn tortilla.

I knew that I’d need to add chicken to my version because P is of the belief that vegetables are what food eats. He needs meat. So I bought a rotisserie chicken from HEB.

And when I went to check out, Lynette was bagging my groceries for me and held up the rotisserie chicken and said, “GIRL, you got to REPRESENT with the cooked chicken. It’s about workin’ smarter, not harder”.

Amen, Lynette. REPRESENT.

I diced the chicken, threw it in the pot, and served the whole thing with an array of options to customize the soup-eating experience: diced avocado, monterey jack cheese, sour cream and fried strips of corn tortilla.

And in the end, my bowl looked like this.

By the way, I fried those strips of corn tortilla myself.

Because I wanted to REPRESENT.

***Edited to add that you can just dice the onion into really small pieces if you don’t have a food processor or a blender to puree it.

***Also edited to add that to fry the corn tortilla strips, you just need to buy a package of corn tortillas, cut them into long strips. Heat up oil in a skillet and then fry the strips until they are crispy and a little brown.
Gone with the wind or Darth Vader or a pirate

Stop me if you’ve heard this one.

A pirate, Darth Vader and a Southern Belle walk into a bar…

I’m not really going anywhere with that but I kept looking at those three on Saturday afternoon and thinking they seemed like a punchline to a joke. It’s not every day that you see such an odd assortment of characters unless it’s time to visit the DMV and renew your drivers’ license.

One of the many reasons we decided to head to College Station for the weekend, other than to visit Honey and Big and avoid vegetable casseroles, was to attend a Diamond Darling reunion. We decided to skip the Friday night dinner, but thought the kids might enjoy going to the baseball field on Saturday for an alumni baseball game. In theory, we’d love to take them to a football game but the tickets are way too pricey for a crew that may decide they’re ready to bail once the $15.00 bucket of popcorn runs out.

Here are Caroline and Jackson at Olsen Field.

Gulley and I laughed after our road trip this summer because we had all these pictures of Caroline and Jackson together and then pictures of Will by himself. Sometimes it was because he was looking for his shoes or in the bathroom, but mostly it’s because he can’t be bothered to pose for pictures. A pirate needs to be free.

But I caught him this time.

Granted, he’s not looking at the camera but I’m going to consider this a W.

The kids had a great time and even got to play baseball with some of the current Aggie baseball players and that pretty much made their life. Well, except for Will. He was off picking up stray baseballs and warning kids that if you walked all the way to the top of the bleachers “you might die”. He’s a fan of the alarming statement.

Here’s Jackson getting ready for a power hit.

And Caroline going for a bunt.

I don’t think she was actually trying to bunt, but it looks really impressive.

After a few hours we headed home from the game but had to make a quick trip to Sonic because, well, it’s Sonic and Gulley and I were in need of some caffeine to help us gear up for the next activity on our agenda.

When Nena heard we were coming to town, she requested that all the kids bring their Halloween costumes and come trick or treat at her house a week early. And, not only that, she called one of her neighbors and Uncle Johnny and told them they needed to have candy for the kids.

So we got everyone into costume and began to take pictures of the odd little trio, but first we had to find the little pirate.

And we have a winner.

They are full-service trick or treaters and believe in the value of a little performance theater to go along with all the begging for candy. It also helped that they were all jacked up on about eight Tootsie Rolls courtesy of Uncle Johnny.

This pretty much sums up their haul

What she doesn’t know is that I’m going to recycle about half of that on Saturday night.

After all the trick or treat fun, we changed their clothes and went to Wings ‘N More for dinner. Normally I’m not a fan of eating establishments that use a ‘N in their title, but I make an exception for Wings ‘N More because it is just so good. I always forgo the wings in favor of a chicken fried steak because OH MY WORD at the delicious and the kids discovered the culinary wonder that is fried pickles. The sad part is that my sodium intake on Saturday night was so great that I couldn’t get my wedding ring on the next day until I drank two bottles of water. I should be embarrassed to admit that but I’m just going to throw it out there so you can realize the depth of my love for the chicken fried steak.

The next morning every one was sad to pack up and leave but it had to be done. Gulley and I loaded up the car and I made sure my wedding ring was secure in the zipper pocket of my purse before we said our goodbyes. Caroline declared that it was “the saddest day” of her entire life and she was “going to cry myself to sleep all the way home”.

I knew I wouldn’t get that lucky.

Instead she chose to take out her sadness in the form of extended whining over the fact that Will was humming a song quietly to himself and it was annoying her. And then Will, sensing his power, continued to hum quietly to himself while staring directly at her.

It was at this point that I dispensed the first of many pieces of wisdom that would be given throughout the duration of this road trip. “It’s all fun and games until all that whining means we don’t get to stop for a DQ Blizzard in Bastrop”.

That statement caused an instant reconciliation amongst the back seat and Gulley and I got caught up in our own in depth conversation wherein I uttered the profound statement that “people want to think the grass is greener on the other side, but you know what’s over there? MORE GRASS”.

In fact, “It’s Just More Grass” may be the title of the self-help book that I’ll never actually write.

But my personal favorite words of wisdom came from Gulley during the last thirty minutes of the trip when she broke up a back seat scuffle by declaring “When you lick the person sitting next to you, there’s a good chance you’re going to get punched”.

I believe the only reason that gem is missing from the book of Proverbs is because Solomon obviously never traveled with three kids in the back of his chariot.