Month: November 2010

  • Just a good ‘ol hormones never meanin’ no harm

    Last night we were watching an episode of Dukes of Hazzard because that show has become Caroline’s new obsession ever since P and I introduced her to it about two weeks ago. We believe it’s important to instill culture in your children at an early age. And, truly, it has brought up some interesting talking points around our household such as why Bo and Luke always take their shirts off before they fight, why Bo wears his jeans so tight, and why Daisy, Bo, and Luke all are grown-ups but still live with their Uncle Jesse.

    I don’t know the answers to any of these questions. Actually, I have my suspicions about the shirtless Duke boys and the tight jeans, but I don’t know why they all lived with Uncle Jesse. I just appreciate that Caroline is astute enough to wonder about things that never crossed my mind all those Friday nights that I wrapped myself up in my Raggedy Ann sleeping bag and watched the Dukes on a huge console T.V.

    And here’s my question. Do y’all think Daisy always had on pantyhose with her shorts? After careful observation, I’m about 94% certain she did.

    But that’s not really the point of any of this. The episode we watched last night involved a con-woman who duped Roscoe P. Coltrane into marrying her so that she and her co-conspirators could pull off a bank robbery or something. I’m not totally sure about that part because I was in the middle of turning a turkey into a hunter, which is another story entirely and I realize seems completely out of context here.

    (Are you wondering if I’m so desperate for material that I’ve stooped to recaps of antiquated hillbilly T.V. shows? I promise this is going somewhere. Although I can’t guarantee this whole blog won’t plummet to that level at some point in the next year or so.)

    Toward the end of the episode, Roscoe realizes he’s been duped by his bride and is heartbroken. And, I kid you not, I realized I had tears in my eyes. I genuinely felt sad for a fake sheriff in a fictional backwoods town.

    There is only one good reason for this. Hormonal fluctuations.

    I blame two things: my insurance company and whoever makes the generic version of Yaz birth control pills.

    This whole thing started back in June when I went to pick up my prescription and the pharmacist informed me that there was now a generic version of Yaz and, HOORAY FOR ME, that’s what my insurance company pays for. Even though they technically don’t pay for anything until I meet a $500 deductible which never happens until it’s time for a new year to begin again.

    So I took home my generic Yaz and felt like I could totally tell the difference after about three days. But I tried to mind over matter the whole thing because my pharm rep past has made me suspect that all generic drugs have the potential to be of the devil. It’s true. You can look it up on the internet if you don’t believe me.

    Because all information found on the internet is 100% accurate.

    Fast forward to about three weeks ago when I had my annual appointment with my OB/Gyn.

    (I’m certain this is the point in this post when you wish I’d just stuck to a recap of The Dukes of Hazzard.)

    He asked me how I was feeling and I rattled off a long list of complaints including feeling hot at random times, insomnia, and the occasional desire to rev the engine of my station wagon and peel out of the driveway in a fit of anger. But then I said, “You’re probably just going to tell me it’s because I’m about to be 40.”

    And he replied, “No, I think it may be your pills. I’ve had several complaints about the generic version.”

    At which point I did a few fist pumps in my mind because VINDICATION.

    So he switched me to a new pill. I just started it a few days ago. And now you really know more than I ever intended for the internet to know.

    But I forgot about the side effects, like hormone headaches and nausea and the desire to throw the remote control through the T.V. because you can’t stand to listen to one more hunter whisper loudly throughout an entire thirty-minute hunting program, that come with starting a new pill.

    I just hope they don’t last too much longer because at some point we’re going to get to the episode where Boss Hogg thinks he’s dying and gives Uncle Jesse the deed to the Duke farm.

    And that may be too much emotion for me to handle right now.

    ______________________________

    On a serious note, I want to say thank you to all the veterans for their brave service. I pray that none of us take our freedom for granted. It has come at a price.

    “This nation will remain the land of the free only so long as it is the home of the brave.” – Elmer Davis

  • Some stuff about some things

    1. Before I say anything else I just have to say thank you for the encouraging comments yesterday. Sometimes it’s hard to know how vulnerable to be on the world wide web and I wish we could all have a group hug.

    I can’t remember if I read this somewhere or heard it somewhere or if I just thought it up on my own (let’s pretend it’s the last one), but I think the world would be a kinder place if we kept in mind that all of us have some cracks in our hearts, even if they don’t show on the outside.

    2. Speaking of things that are broken.

    Something has gone terribly awry with our jack-o-lanterns.

    P and I have been involved in the Great Pumpkin Standoff of 2010. Neither of us wanted to be the one to go shovel those suckers off our front steps so we both pretended they weren’t there.

    But I finally caved yesterday.

    I blame the fruit flies.

    3. I would pay $50 for a box of Hot Tamales right now.

    4. Last night we were eating family dinner and P told Caroline and me about a snake he’d seen earlier in the day while he was working at the ranch. Apparently it was only about eleven inches long and looked just like a baby rattlesnake but didn’t have a rattle. And when he picked it up, it coiled up into a tight little circle and stayed that way even when P tossed it from one hand to another.

    Please take a moment to process that last sentence. WHY WOULD HE PICK IT UP? WHY?

    So I asked, “WHY DID YOU PICK IT UP? HOW DID YOU KNOW IT WOULDN’T BITE YOU? HOW DO YOU KNOW IT WASN’T A BABY RATTLESNAKE THAT WAS MISSING A RATTLE?”

    He looked at me as if I were the crazy one and replied, “I knew it wasn’t poisonous because it had a pointed tail”.

    Oh, well sure. It had a pointed tail.

    And then Caroline said, “DID YOU KNOW IF YOU DIE IN THE JUNGLE THAT ARMY ANTS WILL EAT YOUR ENTIRE BODY?”

    I am a stranger in my own home.

    5. I downloaded Dave Barnes’ new Christmas album, Very Merry Christmas, yesterday and it is delightful. And it’s only $6.99 on iTunes right now.

    That’s a lot of Christmas for not very much money.

    6. The door guy still hasn’t shown up to replace the window in the new front door. And yesterday P asked me if I paid him in full. Which, YES, I did.

    And so now I’m worried that I might be stuck with a piece of plywood in my new door until I actually call a glass company. I think we all know that may never happen.

    7. Does anyone have any suggestions on where to order some cute and unique Christmas cards? I know about Shutterfly and all those places, but I was hoping for something a little different.

    8. Swanson broth is giving away a $500 gift card right now. Click on over to my giveaway page to find out how to enter. It couldn’t be easier.

    9. I’m adding this one late, but I just read this post by Jon Acuff this morning and adore it.

  • The where against the why

    Okay. Here I go. This is a lot for me to get out in the aftermath of a post about my sheer giddiness over the Aggies victory against Oklahoma.

    The last few months have been filled with a few things that have made me feel left out. Nothing huge or earth-shattering by any stretch of the imagination, but enough to make me feel a little bit like I’m in fourth grade again and the last one picked for the kickball team. Even though this is different because it has been YEARS since I’ve kicked a big, red rubber ball straight back to the pitcher making myself what is known as an easy out.

    (Which only actually happened TWICE, by the way. But, gah, fourth graders are an unforgiving bunch where kickball is concerned.)

    And, honestly, I’d like to pretend like I am way too secure and confident to ever feel left out. I’d like to say that I’m a bigger person than that. But apparently I’m not.

    Gulley and I have this theory that sometimes the hardest thing about being the bigger person in a situation is that no one ever tells you you’re being the bigger person. Which is why we now always make a point to tell each other when we think the other one is being a bigger person. We’ve had several conversations that end with one of us saying, “WELL, let me assure you that YOU are the bigger person”.

    Which really has nothing to do with any of this but should rather be viewed as just a side note providing full access into our brand of lunacy.

    Anyway, the thing about feeling left out is it turns into some sort of quicksand of self-doubt. What’s wrong with me? Am I not a likable person? Is it because I’m socially awkward? Am I not good enough? Is it because I admit to watching every season of The Bachelor? Do people think I’m shallow?

    Then I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror and lose my train of thought because I notice a new gray hair which leads to a full evaluation regarding the state of my eyebrows until I realize it’s time for a new episode of the Real Housewives of Atlanta.

    No way anyone thinks I’m shallow.

    So, basically, I’ve been struggling with all these feelings of being inadequate and questioning why things happen the way they do and wondering why I’m not good enough for this or that.

    Friday night I got in bed and couldn’t sleep. Mainly because I forgot to take a Benadryl. I tossed and turned and eventually just decided to get still and hope that sleep would win out at some point. But my mind started racing with all these things that I’ve perceived as slights and I began to get all worked up. All my doubts and fears came flying to the surface until I felt like I wanted to cry.

    And at that moment I felt God speak to my heart and say, “You need to quit asking ‘Why?’ and start asking me ‘Where?'”

    I knew immediately it was God because I wouldn’t have come up with anything that profound. And I certainly wouldn’t have come up with something that succinct.

    I’ve been in a cycle of asking “Why not me?” or “Why me?” or “Why is this so hard?” and it’s time for me to ask “Where would you have me go? Where would you have me serve? Where are you leading me?”

    Don’t get me wrong. I think there is a time to ask why. I have friends that are facing hard circumstances that are the kinds of things that can only leave them to question why. And I think God understands that, even if we don’t always find out the answer.

    But my “Why?” had become a question that had me spiraling down into a pit of self-pity. Which is hard to admit because I’d like to think I’m better than that.

    See? I want to be the bigger person.

    However, asking “Where?” changes things. It takes the focus off me and what I perceive to be my failures and shortcomings and puts the focus where it belongs. On God. The One who has plans and purposes for me in spite of all my failures and fears. He knows what they are because He made me this way. And when I look to see where He’s leading, I’m too busy to spend a lot of useless time asking why.

    Because the why doesn’t really matter as much as the where.

    The where is the question that asks, “What am I supposed to be doing?” instead of the why that seems to say, “What am I doing wrong?” I hope that makes sense because it made total sense to me around 2:30 a.m. on Saturday morning. And it still made sense the next day. And it makes sense now even though I feel like I’m not conveying it very well.

    I wish I could tie this all up and say I know exactly where I’m headed and what God has in store for me. I don’t. I don’t know any of that right now.

    But I do know that I’m asking the right question for the first time in a long time. It’s not about me. It’s about Him.

    “Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do; Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead.” Phillipians 3:12-13

  • Football is good

    Saturday afternoon was the last game of the season for the Cheetah Girls. I really hoped for a win because they’ve had such a great season and I wanted them to go out on a high note. And, sure enough, they ended up winning the game 6-4. I realize there isn’t an actual goalie or scoreboard but let’s not pretend that we don’t all know who wins and who loses.

    I mean, they’re seven years old now. They get it. Personally I believe that not everyone is a winner and sometimes you’re the loser and being the loser isn’t necessarily a bad thing if it makes you want to try harder to be a winner.

    And thus concludes the Monday morning soapbox portion of this post.

    I think Hazel just showed up for a minute.

    I’m also so glad that I went to the trouble of bringing my camera along so I could get this stellar unidentifiable shot of P and Caroline doing some pre-game stretches.

    I am in desperate need of a new camera. Canon, can you hear me?

    So the Cheetah Girls triumphed over the Neon Cobras (Not to be confused with the regular Cobras we played earlier in the season. These cobras were NEON and everyone knows the neon snakes are the toughest reptiles around.) and we went to one of the player’s homes for a little end of the season celebration. P handed out trophies, we celebrated our win and I thought to myself “Well, this has been a great day for sports.”

    AND THEN THIS HAPPENED.

    There is so much right about that scoreboard that it’s hard to keep track.

    And this is where you may want to go read something else if you don’t care about football.

    In the days leading up to the Aggies game against #8 OU, I wasn’t feeling that great about it. In fact, I felt like it might be ugly. But then, about an hour before game time, the spirit of football optimism washed over me and I even boldly twittered (tweeted?) that I thought we could win the game.

    Then P, Caroline and I sat down with our bowls of leftover homemade tortilla soup and began to watch. And here’s what you need to know, I am the biggest football fan in our home. P would have just as soon been sitting in a deer blind. In fact, I still can’t believe he wasn’t in a deer blind. This weekend was the first full weekend in November that we’ve spent together since we met. It was like the Haley’s Comet of our relationship, we won’t see it again in our lifetime.

    The first half of the game was so glorious. I cheered, I screamed, I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. And I vowed that I wouldn’t forget my happiness even if it all fell apart in the second half. Until it looked like it was falling apart in the third quarter and there was some wailing and gnashing of teeth. And maybe a throwing of a couch cushion.

    But then we came back and our defense was unbelievable. And we won. WE WON.

    I realize that at least 85% of you could probably care less about any of this.

    Gulley and I texted back and forth the entire game in shock and awe with things like “VON MILLER!!!” and “WRECKING CREW!!!” and “I AM SO STRESSED!!!” Then Sophie sent me a text about thirty minutes after the game to congratulate me on the Aggies win because if there is anyone who understands my football obsession, it’s Sophie. And I was so hyped up on adrenaline and victory that I immediately texted her back with this:

    “I KNOW!!!! IT’S HUGE!!!! WE HELD THEM THREE DIFFERENT TIMES AT THE GOAL LINE!!! BETWEEN THIS GAME AND THE LONGHORNS LOSING AGAIN AND FIFTY HIGH SCHOOL RECRUITS IN ATTENDANCE AT KYLE FIELD TONIGHT, THIS COULD BE SO BIG FOR OUR FUTURE!!!! I AM SO WOUND UP THAT I MAY NOT SLEEP TONIGHT!!!”

    I’m so glad I told her I was wound up because, otherwise, it might have been hard for her to figure it out, what with all the caps-lock and excessive punctuation.

    And then, just like I called the outcome of the game on Twitter, I was totally right about my prediction that I wouldn’t sleep. I tossed and turned all night because I couldn’t wind myself down.

    So much for the extra hour of sleep.

    But I’ll just go ahead and say that it was totally worth it.

    Gig’em Aggies. Beat the hell outta Baylor.

    I promise I’ll be back tomorrow and will talk about something other than football.

  • Fashion Friday: Edition so much cute to be found

    I spent a few hours shopping yesterday. Technically, I said that I was on a shopping sabbatical, but that was before I realized I still haven’t found a pair of black booties. So I went on a search yesterday and I have absolutely nothing to show for it.

    Here’s the issue. The booties I like best in person are the open-toed booties. I just haven’t found a pair of closed toe booties that look like I want them to look when I picture them in my mind. But, yet, the reality of owning a pair of open-toed booties perplexes me for a few reasons.

    Reason #1: I assume I can’t wear them with any sort of tights. That would be wrong on several levels and might cause me to have flashbacks to third grade and an unfortunate fashion decision involving Yo-Yo sandals and pantyhose. There may have also been a red dress made out of terry cloth. But I’ve blocked out that part.

    Reason #2: The winter pedicure. I can’t deal.

    Reason #3: My feet are cold even in the dead of summer. I enjoy wearing socks when the temperatures drop.

    All of which have led to my dreadful inability to find the right bootie.

    (Clearly this is what is known as a first world problem.)

    Okay, so today’s Fashion Friday is filled with some really cute things and, BEST OF ALL, everything is under $100.

    1. Trickle down top

    There are so many great things on sale at Anthropologie right now. I think that Trickle Down top is adorable. But I also love this First light tank and think it would be great with a jacket thrown over it.

    But wait! There’s more! This Mottisfront top is so great and I’m also loving this Setting Sun tank.

    Dear Anthropologie,

    I have a love/hate relationship with you. I hate that you never acknowledge my existence or send me any sort of coupons. But I love the way your stores smell. I adore most of your clothing. I have long desired a few of your kitchen towels. And you do have some good sales. Call me!

    Love,
    Melanie

    2. Can’t Chain Me Down boots

    I don’t know what it is about these boots, but I saw them online yesterday and couldn’t quit thinking about them. I think it may be the chains.

    But if chains aren’t your thing, you might want to check out these Rocket Dog cozy knit clogs. They look like winter in a shoe.

    And I’m also a big fan of these Tall Whiskey fold rugged boots. They’re cute and versatile. It’s like a Transformer in a shoe. Or a boot. Or whatever.

    3. Wanigan coat

    And we’re back to Anthropologie. But this time it’s about coats.

    I think I featured this coat a while back. The difference is now it’s on sale for $99.99. And I’ve also realized that the fur collar is detachable which just makes me love it more.

    I also really like this Kirklees sweater coat and can vouch for the fact that it’s prettier in person.

    And then I saw this Dollhouse jacket and thought it would be great paired with jeans or pants or a skirt for holiday parties. It’s very festive.

    Oh, and I’m intrigued by this Pattern Maker’s coat. I’d have to see it in person to know for sure, but I think it has real potential.

    4. Mad for Plaid long tunic

    This is the kind of thing that draws me in like good reality television. It’s casual and comfortable and I could throw it on with leggings three times a week.

    On a totally different note, I also adore this Cute as a button ivory wool peacoat. It’s the buttons. They make me want to be a better person. A person who could wear an ivory wool peacoat.

    5. Felt Buckle coat

    I went in our new Forever 21 yesterday, which used to be a Mervyn’s, and was totally overwhelmed. It’s enormous. And I didn’t see this coat in person. But that could be because I couldn’t quit looking at the racks and racks of bargain-priced jewelry and flowered headbands and crocheted beanie-type hats that make me want to be a person who can wear crocheted beanie-type hats.

    6. Tinley Road Sergeant jacket

    Piperlime has a whole section of items right now that are all less than $75 and there are many, many cute things on featured. But I chose this jacket. Because I like it.

    7. The Soloist dress

    I don’t know where the picture of this dress is located. Somewhere in cyberspace.

    But I really like it.

    8. Royal Treatment tunic

    I’m never sure how I feel about purple, but I can just picture this tunic with some charcoal gray leggings and some gray boots or black tights and black booties. And maybe some big, chunky silver bracelets? Is anyone else seeing that or is it just me?

    9. Lettuce-edge v-neck sweater

    I tried this on in the store the other day and really liked it. But I didn’t buy it because I am in the midst of a spending hiatus. It comes in several colors and is on sale for $49.50. However, when I was in the store the other day it was an additional 30% off.

    Dang my spending hiatus. I should have bought this sweater.

    10. Flyaway Tiered cardigan

    It’s one of the best times of the year. Yes, it’s Fall and the leaves are turning and the weather is chilly and I had to put an extra blanket on the bed last night. But, more importantly, it’s time for Nordstrom’s half-yearly sale and there are so many good deals to be had. Like the flyaway cardigan. And several great coats.

    It would also be a good time to buy a new pair of jeans if you’re in the market for such a thing. There are some really good prices right now.

    And that is it for today.

    I wish I could say I was heading back out to continue my bootie search, but I’m not. I have to clean my house. Because I can’t stand it any longer.

    The dust. The dust is out of control.

    And the toothpaste on Caroline’s bathroom counter. There is perpetually toothpaste on the bathroom counter. Someone help me understand why it’s so hard to put the toothpaste directly on the toothbrush.

    Y’all have a great Friday.

    _______________________________________

    Don’t forget to check out the LG TextEd posts over at BlogHer. There are some great posts about monitoring your teen’s cell phone usage. I don’t really want to think about that yet.

  • You can’t handle the dance

    Because I think we’ve all been wondering, Caroline agreed to show us a few of her dangerous moves.

    Dangerous from Big Mama on Vimeo.

    Bless her heart, you can see that I had to twist her arm to get her to dance.

    For the record, I think she inherited her moves from her daddy.

    Although he usually doesn’t need a hat.