Fashion

The other day I was getting Caroline dressed for school and she begged me to let her wear her blue flip-flops.  I agreed that she could, as long as we packed a pair of tennis shoes in her school bag.  Then I brushed her hair into a ponytail and put a hot pink bow in it.

She felt me slip the bow in and said, “I DO NOT want that bow in my hair.”

“Why?  It looks so cute!”

“I don’t like it.”

“Well, I’m letting you wear your flip-flops so you need to wear the bow for me.”

“Okay, I’ll wear it, but as soon as I get to school I’m going to put it in my bag and forget this bow ever happened.”

I laughed and realized that statement sums up how I feel about everything I wore from 1985 to 1993.  If only there wasn’t so much photographic evidence of all the sins I committed in the name of fashion trends.

But that’s why they’re called “trends”.  Just keep in mind that not all trends are meant for everyone.

I wish someone would have told me that back in the 80’s before I wore those lace fingerless gloves and blue eyeliner.

Anyway, according to all my minutes of research, here are ten trends for Spring and Summer.  If you don’t like them, don’t shoot the fashion messenger.

TRENDS FOR SPRING AND SUMMER

1.  Slouchy pants 

Is it just me or does this make you think of the line in “Nacho Libre” when he says that sometimes a man likes to wear stretchy pants when he’s alone in his room?  Yeah, just me.  After twelve years of marriage to P, I have inherited his tendency to think of life as a series of movie quotes.

This is actually a decent trend because it involves one of my favorite fashion elements, which is comfort.  These are essentially pants that fit loose through the hips and can either be full-length or capris.  The styles can range from a pair of boyfriend-type jeans like Katie Holmes has been sporting to a loose pair of cargos.

The key is to pair these pants with something more fitted on top.  You want the pants to be slouchy, not you.  

2. Hot pink

I’ll just be up front and tell you that I also saw mention of “neon” pink, but I’m going to pretend like I didn’t because I’ve done neon once in my life and I’m not doing it again.  Although I did love my hot pink and neon green Santa Cruz outfit back in 1986.

I am totally on board with hot pink.  It’s a great accent color for almost any outfit because it is bright and happy without a tendency to sometimes be overly dramatic like it’s second cousin, red.

Look for a great hot pink scarf or necklace to add to your wardrobe.  Or you could always wear a hot pink tee with jeans and some hot pink patent thong sandals.  And if you really want to get on the hot pink train (what the heck is a hot pink train?), you could find a hot pink bag to get you through the summer.

3. The statement necklace

I wore a lot of necklaces in the early 80’s that made a statement.  The statement was “This is a lot of twist-a-beads wound together and I’m not sure this faux gold shell clip is going to fasten.”  Thankfully, what we’re looking for here is a different kind of statement.

There are so many different types of necklaces that fit this category and you can find them in any price range.  I’m a big fan of turquoise pretty much all year round, but I adore it during the spring and summer months.

4. Black and white prints

The good news is, if you’re like me, you already have an assortment of at least ten different black shirts in your closet.  Pair those shirts with something white and you’re all set.  That’s a little fashion tip I like to call “making do in the midst of a recession”.

However, if you must have something new, there are plenty of cute black and white options to choose from.  The great thing is that it’s so versatile and you can accessorize with any color you want. 

5. The trench

It’s not just for Inspector Gadget anymore.

According to Tim Gunn, the trench should be a closet staple.  I used to be conflicted about this because I didn’t understand why anyone would want a boring tan trench coat in their closet unless they had a side job as a flasher.  However, they now come in so many cute styles and colors that I get it.  I have embraced the trench.

In fact, I would pledge my undying love to this one, except technically it’s not really a trench. 

6. The scarf

You know I love you, but we have beat the scarf thing to death at this point.  It’s not that I don’t adore them, but I am sick of talking about them.  

For more on scarves, here’s a video on how to wear them and here are a few scarf options.

7. Embellished sandals

 There was a time about twenty years ago when I vowed I would never wear sandals again.  I have deep insecurities regarding my feet and figured why would I ever wear sandals when I have Keds in every color?  Obviously, I had to rethink that whole Keds thing a few years later and, after a lot of therapy, I’ve learned that my feet are okay just the way they are.

All that being said, embellished sandals are a fun way to make an outfit stand out.  I particularly like these and these.

8. Ruffles

I love the look of a ruffled shirt with a pair of jeans.  Maybe it has something to do with the contrast between the feminine ruffles and the denim or maybe I’m just trying to write something that sounds intelligent and thoughtful.

Whatever the case may be, there are some really cute ruffled shirts and I love this ruffle trim jacket and how cute is this trench with a ruffle hem?

9. Cool colors like turquoise

Oh my word, why didn’t I just post six trends for Spring?  This is wearing me out and I need to finish so I can watch “30 Rock” in peace.

Look for accessories and clothing in beautiful blues and greens.  It’s the next best thing to being in the pool.

10. Neutrals (beiges, khakis, etc.)

I don’t really know how I feel about neutrals.  I’m like Switzerland when it comes to neutrals, which is to say that I’m neutral.  Also, the word “neutral” looks really weird when you type it that many times in a row.

This is like that old saying “Beige makes the world go ’round”, except no one has probably ever said that until now because I just made it up.  The point is that to balance your hot pinks and cool blues, you must occasionally have some neutral influences.  

Think about adding a jacket like this one or some bone-colored wedge sandals to your wardrobe.  Or maybe just a nice pair of khaki bermuda shorts that you can wear with anything.

I can’t believe we’re done.  

And it only took me the better part of ALL DAY LONG.  This whole research thing is exhausting, which is the main reason I prefer to just state my opinion on a subject as opposed to substantiating any facts.

Anyway, hopefully this will help you hit the stores feeling just like a boy scout, and, by that, I mean ALWAYS PREPARED.

Last but not least, make sure you visit the Daily Links page to read about winning an opportunity to attend the She Speaks Conference for free.

I’m putting up Mr. Linky if you have anything to add to the discussion from your blog or feel free to add some thoughts in the comments.

 

 

First of all, I need to apologize to the makers of the Slanket/Snuggie. After two days of temperatures that haven’t gotten above 50, I would sell my Aunt Pearl to own a Snuggie.

(I don’t really have an Aunt Pearl.)

(I could actually go up to HEB and buy a Snuggie if I really wanted one. I’m just being dramatic.)

The point is that if someone tried to judge if I was alive by feeling my feet for any sign of warmth or life, they would bury me alive. Not even my Uggs can help me now.

Okay, so many of y’all asked about the green sundress Caroline was wearing in Tuesday’s post. I found it at TJ Maxx for $10.00. It’s a brand called Hype and it must run small because that dress is a size 8. I always check TJ Maxx for their kids’ clothes because they have some amazing deals and carry a lot of brand name stuff.

Kids have a total racket going with that whole “growing out of things” issue that they have going on. It’s all a pretty clever scheme to ensure a whole new wardrobe every season. Technically, I guess I could eat eighteen pans of brownies and grow out of my clothes too.

On a totally different note, last Friday I drove to Georgetown to talk to a MOPS group about fashion. They asked me to discuss spring trends and how to make the most of your wardrobe. So in lieu of answering questions today, I thought I’d share with you all the fashion advice I imparted in Georgetown, Texas last week.

1. Before you buy anything or go shopping, SHOP YOUR CLOSET.

I realize that sounds totally depressing and, trust me, it totally is. However, you may be surprised to find a few things that you’d forgotten you own. This happened to me in the form of a cute white tuxedo shirt I bought from Gap about six years ago and have now worn twice in the last two weeks.

The most entertaining way to do this is to invite a friend over whose opinion you trust, give the kids a bag of glass to keep them occupied, and try on EVERYTHING in your closet. Pants, jeans, dresses, shoes, and accessories.

EVERYTHING.

2. Make four piles: KEEP, DONATE, THROW IT OUT, ALTERATIONS

Here are some guidelines: If it’s stained, pilled, or faded then throw it out. Don’t look at me like that, THROW IT OUT.

If you haven’t worn it in two years, throw it out or donate it. The only exception is if it has the potential to be a quality vintage piece someday. I don’t care what anyone tells you, those faded pink capri pants from Old Navy will never be considered vintage.

Be honest about what you think needs to be altered. In fact, if you don’t take it to a tailor within two weeks of putting it in the Alterations pile, then you need to get rid of it because that garment is never going to become acquainted with a needle and thread.

3. Group what’s left by category and color.

Be prepared to mourn the lack of quantity in your closet, but console yourself with the fact that you never wore any of that other stuff anyway. It was all just a grown-up version of a security blanket, Linus.

Once you have a moment of silence for the dearly departed, put everything in categories according to whether it’s a shirt, jeans, dress, etc. Look at everything and put together some complete outfits, including shoes and jewelry.

If you’re really anal and organized, you can write potential outfits down on paper, or you can be like me and just remember them using Jedi mind tricks.

4. Now figure out what you need to fill in the missing space.

Do you need a new white t-shirt to wear under something? Some new tanks? Maybe a new statement necklace or a cuff bracelet to make an outfit pop a little bit?

You may not be able to go buy it all at once, but at least you know what you have and what you need. This will keep you from owning eight of the exact same black tanks from Old Navy.

Purely hypothetical scenario.

5. Every closet should have a few essential things, no matter the trends.

(Am I about to do an outline? Shut up. I thought that was a completely impractical skill set, like quadratic equations.)

(Is there really such a thing as quadratic equations?)

A. A great pair of jeans that are comfortable and fit well.

I am a believer in spending a little more for a great pair of jeans because, if you’re like me, you’ll wear them all the time. You can find great deals on designer jeans at TJ Maxx, Ebay, and even Sam’s.

What kind of marvelous world do we live in when you can purchase high-end jeans and bulk toilet paper all in one convenient location?

B. A decent pair of workout pants or yoga pants.

There will be days that you don’t want to dress up and if you have some decent looking athletic wear, you can just give the illusion that you’ve been working out, as opposed to giving up on life.

C. A comfortable, yet stylish pair of shoes.

Sneakers, flip-flops, cute sandals, mary janes, clogs, cowboy boots. Something you can wear every day and still look cute.

Of course, it’s also nice to have some shoes that aren’t as practical but fill up a little place in your heart and make you happy.

D. A well-fitting swimsuit and coverup.

(I also truly adore this one but we need to spend money on things like food) that allow you to chase your child around the pool while maintaining your dignity.

I hate to open this can of cellulite-fearing worms, but it’s true. If you have a child then it’s hard to avoid the swimsuit in the summer time, unless you hire an aquatic nanny.

E. A nice outfit for dinner out with the girls or a date with your husband and/or significant other.

Maybe a cute, short-sleeved linen jacketor fun top paired with jeans. Then there’s always the option of a casual dress, or maybe a little more tailored dress, or even a skirt.

Okay, that is a lot of information for one post. I was going to start in on trends for spring, but I’m going to save it for next week for two reasons. First of all, because I can. It’s like a cliffhanger or, rather, a clothes’ hanger. (I’m sorry, I couldn’t help myself even though I know it’s stupid.) And secondly, I need to get a good night’s sleep because y’all have inspired me to finish out our Spring Break with a day o’ crafts and mani/pedis tomorrow. It’s going to require all my energy.

I’m putting up Mr. Linky if you want to add any fashion information to this post. You may also want to check out a great fashion post that Kelly wrote this week. She had some great bargain finds.

Have a great Friday!

So, before I even get started with this week’s Fashion Friday, I need to say thank you for all your coffee table support. It’s nice to know that most of you have very similar coffee table issues. I have long suffered from coffee table insecurity and am comforted to know I’m not the only one who uses it as some sort of catch-all for candy and remote controls.

March 2 is Texas Independence Day and Caroline’s school had Rodeo Day yesterday to celebrate the occasion. I signed up to volunteer for the festivities because I had some vague notion that it might be like all the Texas Independence Day celebrations I went to in college. A case of Lone Star Light, some lawn chairs, Robert Earl Keen blaring over someone’s stereo and, if we were really feeling festive, a bucket of fried chicken.

Apparently, that’s not how Kindergartners roll. I ended up being the DJ for the dancing portion of the festivities, which basically involved constantly pressing rewind and play on a tape called “The Wagon Trail”. But because I like to shake things up, we also did the Chicken Dance. I feel that it embodies everything that those men fought and died for at the Alamo.

Anyway, yesterday morning I was pulling out Caroline’s Western apparel for her to wear to school and realized her Wrangler shirt was terribly wrinkled. I tried to ignore it, but I knew I needed to pull out the iron. So I dragged out the ironing board and began ironing the shirt into some semblance of respectability.

About that time, Caroline walked into the kitchen and saw me ironing in the laundry room. She cocked her head to the side as if she had stumbled upon a freak show and said, “What are you doing, Mama?”

“I’m ironing.”

“Oh. Hey! I saw somebody do that on T.V. one time.”

What can I say? I am a firm believer in dry-cleaning. Or wrinkled clothes.

Now for the questions.

1. Melissa asks: “I’m flying to LA this weekend to see a guy I went to high school with and recently reconnected with on Facebook. So I need ‘don’t I look fabulous and wouldn’t it make a great chick flick if we fell in love because of Facebook’ outfits for the trip. Seeing as I’m not 25 or a former DCC I’d like to avoid the scarf and tank top combo a la The Bachelor..any great looks for me?”

Melissa, I don’t even know if I have any great fashion advice to offer you, but I am so fascinated by the whole possibility of a Facebook romance that I’m a little bit giddy. Facebook is a wonder. How did we ever live before we could look up the boy that was mean to us in third grade and rest in the knowledge that he is now totally bald?

Hypothetically speaking.

I think the key is to go cute and casual. Maybe a cute printed trench or a cotton blazer with a pair of jeans for the plane ride.

Depending on your plans for the rest of the weekend, you could put together an outfit like this one (love the statement necklace) or maybe something like this if you’re feeling brave.

And you can never go wrong with a versatile dress that you could dress up or down.

Most importantly, I am going to need a full report on the weekend and whether or not your life will eventually be the subject of the feel-good movie of the year. I know you don’t know me, but I am incredibly nosy.

Hence, my love of Facebook.

2. Angie asks: “My brother got me a $50 gift card to Old Navy for my birthday. If you had $50 to spend there what would you buy for your spring wardrobe?

Too bad I can’t buy a brother because I could seriously use a $50.00 hookup to Old Navy.

But enough about me.

If I had a $50.00 gift certificate to Old Navy, the first thing I’d do is wait for about another month before you buy anything. The upside of these horrible economic times is that they are going to have to drastically reduce prices to move merchandise. Not to mention the fact that you should never pay $26.50 for an item of clothing you buy in a store that has shopping carts.

That being said, I love this skirt and it comes in various colors and patterns. I also really like this tunicswimsuit coverup. These short-sleeve henleys or ruffled front cardigans would go great with jeans, shorts or skirts all summer long.

And if I had any money left over, I’d buy two pairs of flip-flops because if you buy two, they’re only $2.50 a pair.

$2.50 for flip-flops?

Is this 1974?

That’s all the questions for today. I was hoping to answer more questions, but I’ve stayed up way too late every night this week catching up on all the DVRed television that isn’t going to watch itself and I am exhausted. Not to mention that our Spring Break officially starts tomorrow and I’m going to need all the energy I can muster to serve as Caroline’s cruise director for the next ten days with no Kindergarten.

So, in fashion terms, that means it’s time to put on my big girl pants.

I’m putting up Mr. Linky if you have any fashion tips you want to share or feel free to leave them in the comments.

Y’all have a great Friday!

Yesterday morning Caroline decided to wear this cute pink camo outfit that I bought for her at the end of last summer. Since she’s grown about five inches in the last four months, the pants are no longer pants, but rather more of a capri. I was just thrilled that she wanted to wear something other than jeans.

She put the whole outfit on and I asked her if she wanted to wear her tennis shoes. No, no she did not. She wanted to wear her Barbie mirrored platform dress-up shoes, which she would have been completely allowed to wear over my cold, dead body.

When I told her no, I caused her to “have a lot of tears” and then she headed back to her closet to find a more suitable alternative. She emerged a few minutes later wearing red and white striped socks with a googly-eyed Santa Claus on the side with some red, sparkly mary-janes. It was a fashion combo that looked adorable during the holiday season, but doesn’t necessarily translate to late February. Or paired with pink camo.

I told her she was more than welcome to wear the ensemble to school. In fact, my exact words were, “It’s your prerogative, but for the record, those are Christmas socks.”

And then I had a moment of total clarity where I realized what’s missing from my workout playlist on my iPod. BOBBY B! Old school Bobby B. Because it is my prerogative.

Anyway, before it was all over, she changed out of the Christmas socks into her Hello Kitty! socks and traded the pink camo capris for a pair of jeans. And somehow I managed to get her into the car and off to school without having to to medicate myself.

I may enroll her in private school just for the uniforms. The wardrobe issues have me hanging on to my sanity by a very thin thread, my friends.

Now for the questions.

1. Several people are asking the same basic question: “What about skinny jeans? Am I too old for them? How do I know if they are right for me?”

I’m going to be totally honest and say they might be right for you. They might be everything you’re looking for in a denim partnership and, if so, I wish you and your skinny jeans a lifetime of happiness.

But, for me, they are wrong. It’s not a jean journey that I’m willing to take again. I wore skinny jeans for many, many years, but the majority of those years were before puberty really hit and I developed hips.

The only reason I would personally buy skinny jeans would be to tuck them into a pair of great boots, but I just cannot imagine that I’ll ever go back to the skinny jeans with flats or heels combo. That particular brand of fashion ship has sailed for me.

However, all that being said, they are in style. If you can pull them off, both figuratively and literally, then more power to you. I don’t think there’s an age limit as much as there is a figure limit.

My opinion is that by the time you’re in your late twenties to early thirties, it’s more important to wear something that is truly flattering than to bow to the current trends.

To prove my point this is a picture of A MODEL wearing skinny jeans. A MODEL. She probably eats one celery stick a day with a lemon water chaser and I still think she’d look better wearing jeans with some sort of wider leg.

2. Brandy asks: “Where do you find cute, but affordable scarfs? And purses. I want a cute purse!”

I linked to this on my Stuff I Like page yesterday, but I would totally check out Primo Purses if you’re looking for a fun, affordable purse. They’re going out of business and everything is 40% off. Another great site to find affordable, trendy purses is Aldo.

As for affordable scarfs, they are everywhere right now. Walmart has them in every color for $5.00. FIVE DOLLARS. In the words of the tacky ammunition catalogs that P gets in the mail, that is CHEAPER THAN DIRT.

Especially because the price of dirt has skyrocketed in these tumultuous economic times.

And if you are like me and only venture in Walmart during times of excessive desperation or while participating in a scavenger hunt that requires you to take a picture of an elderly woman covered in tattoos and smoking a cigarette while riding a Rascal scooter, then you might prefer one of these darling scarf options.

Remember, it’s the year of the scarf.

3. Joan asks: “What is your solution to the muffin top? Please don’t say pilates.”

Oh Joan. I promise I won’t say pilates.

I believe that you need to become friends with some body-shaping garments. They are a marvel of modern fashion and make any outfit look better. Spanx makes a phenomenal body-slimming cami that has the ability to corral a muffin top. And Target sells a less expensive version called Assets, but I’ve heard it doesn’t have quite the power of Spanx.

There is one other brand I’ve heard great things about called Yummie Tummie. They are body-slimming tanks that come in a variety of colors and, while they are a little pricey, it’s almost worth it just to be able to tell people you’re wearing a Yummie Tummie.

4. Jessica asks: “I’m going to a rehearsal and wedding in March where the dress code is semi-formal/formal. What can a girl on a budget wear?”

Well, the ideal scenario when you’re on a budget and need two dresses, is to find a friend that’s your size and borrow something. And if you don’t have a friend in your size, then you might want to make a new friend to expand your social horizons and your wardrobe selection.

In all seriousness, your best bet is to probably go somewhere like TJ Maxx or Kohls. It can be hit or miss, but if you dig through the racks you might find some really cute dresses.

And because I hate to not link to something, I think something like this cherry taffeta party dress would be precious for the rehearsal dinner and this black halter party dress could totally work for the wedding paired with some pretty patent heels and sparkly jewelry.

5. Stephanie asks: ” While browsing today at the Fashion Show mall, they had a fashion show on swimwear for the season. Several of the models/ensembles involved wearing gloves with swim suits. There were a variety of lengths and textures- wrist length, elbow length, etc. My husband informed me that maybe its the Summer of the Glove, (I then kicked him in the shin) but it prompted me to ask you if this is a style trend that I was not informed of?”

Oh, I hope so!

Because I know when I’m wearing a swimsuit, my primary insecurities revolve around how my hands look.

Y’all have a great Friday.

I’m putting up Mr. Linky if anyone has any fashion advice they want to share with the group.

I know that I’ve expressed my frustration at the new Target (have I mentioned how far it is from my house?) many, MANY times. On the bright side, I’ve cut way back on my Mossimo consumption, but there are some days when you just really want to push that big, red cart around the store and check out all the stuff you don’t really need but feel compelled to buy because LOOK HOW CUTE THOSE VALENTINES PLATES ARE THAT I DIDN’T EVEN KNOW I WANTED!

So on Tuesday, Gulley and I made the fourteen minute trip to Target because we needed to purchase Valentine paraphernalia and I desperately needed to get a new pair of jeans for Caroline.

The good news is I found a great pair of jeans for her for only $9.99. The bad news is I was almost suckered in to buying her a pair of pink madras bermuda shorts for $14.99.

Dear Target,

We are in the midst of the greatest recession of our generation. This is not the time to start charging upwards of $10.00 for an item of clothing that doesn’t even consist of a yard of fabric. Please go back to the days of yore when I could purchase some cute Circo child’s items for $4.99. You are getting way too big for your pink madras bermuda short britches.

Also, I resent the fact that you’ve moved to a location that requires me to stop at three additional stoplights and one superfluous stop sign.

Sincerely,

Melanie

Now for the questions.

1. Angie asks: “Is there a way to LEARN to be fashionable? I am truly so bad that sometimes I come downstairs to leave for church and my husband sends me back up to change shoes! Is there hope for me?”

Yes, Angie, there is hope for you.

If you really want to learn more about fashion, then the best place to start is figuring out your own style and taste. Don’t let those things be completely dictated by fashion magazines. Just because something is trendy doesn’t necessarily mean it’s in your best interest.

Oh how I wish I could go back and give that advice to my twenty-year-old self when I sported those bright red jeans from Express with a bedazzled top.

Buy some magazines or look online at different clothing sites and pay attention to the looks you like and what fits your lifestyle. You’ll probably start to see a common theme. Most retail sites have a section that shows full outfits and it can serve as a great guide to putting together a complete outfit including shoes and a handbag.

Another good tip is to start by wearing basics. Wear jeans and a simple black top, then begin adding fashionable accessories like a scarf and a cute pair of earrings.

2. Desha asks: “Where do you stand on ballet flats? I love them, but most of the men I talk to (including my husband) think they are hideous.”

I don’t stand on ballet flats because I think they are hideous.

Ba-da-pum. Thank you and don’t forget to tip your waiter.

Okay, seriously. I don’t dislike ballet flats but, for the most part, I dislike them on me. I think most of my ballet flat issues can be traced directly back to 1985 when I wouldn’t leave the house unless I had on a pair of ballet flats that perfectly matched my oversized Esprit sweater and the lace bow in my hair a la Madonna.

All that being said, I see other people wearing them and I think they look precious. Maybe I should go to some sort of ballet flat therapy so I can get past my bare-feet-crammed-in-synthetic-leather-shoes-with-no-ventilation phobia.

And then I could go actually make myself wear some darling flats like these or these.

But probably not since just looking at them kind of makes my stomach feel funny. It’s my own personal issue. I’m a girl who likes a heel.

3. Christina and Amy separately asked two questions that go together: “Where are some good places to shop online and what items do I feel safe buying online and not trying on?”

I’ll be honest and say that I do a lot of online browsing for clothes, but not a lot of online buying. I am a big fan of the whole shopping experience. I like to walk through the racks of clothes and feel fabrics and try things on in the dressing room. I prefer the instant gratification of immediate purchase as opposed to “your item will ship in 4-5 days and then there will be a 90% chance that it won’t be as cute as depicted on the size 0 model”.

The few exceptions to that rule are Boden and Bluefly, mainly because neither of those sites has a storefront that I can actually visit, which is a good thing because I am more than a little obsessed with Boden and would like to live in their catalog. If I had actual real-life access to this tunic or these shoes, I would be powerless to resist.

And then I’d come home with them and P would make me return them because have I not noticed that the economy is in the toilet?

Sad times.

Have I even answered either of these questions?

Okay, other than Boden and Bluefly, I like to look online at ShopBop, Anthropologie, Gap, Banana Republic, Francescas Collections, Sam Moon, TopShop, J.Crew, Nordstrom and Piperlime.

There is also a great online shopping service that I’ve mentioned before, but I’ll mention it again because it’s been awhile. It’s called Shop It To Me. You create an account where you can enter in the brands you like, the stores you like and the sizes you wear in everything and then twice a week they send you an email listing everything that’s on sale. It’s like your own personal shopper and it is SOLID GOLD.

As for what I think is safe to buy online, I think it all depends on the return policy. If they offer free returns then I wouldn’t hesitate to order something online, but if I’m going to have to pay to ship something back then I’ll usually opt out unless I just have to have it and can’t find it anywhere else.

I guess what I’m saying is that I’m a fashion pessimist. I always assume most things won’t fit or might be made of some kind of itchy synthetic alpaca.

Alright. That’s all the questions for today because it’s actually Thursday night and I’m tired. I need to gear up for our weekend ‘o Valentine festivities. And by that I mean we really don’t have much going on other than plans to listen to some Air Supply while eating Candy Conversation Hearts.

I’m putting up the Mr. Linky if anyone wants to add their fashion two-cents.

Y’all have a great Friday!

Normally I start Fashion Friday with some kind of light-hearted anecdote that somehow relates to fashion or something like that, but not today because I have something serious to discuss.

Y’all there is an epidemic sweeping across the nation and we can no longer turn a blind eye.

I’m talking about the Snuggie and/or the Slanket.

It was bad enough that it has made its polyester way into my own family, but then many of you owned up to your own Snuggie/Slanket issues in the comments. The final straw was when I read this post by Melissa about how the Slanket has infiltrated her family as well.

It’s just not right.

Look people, I know what it’s like to feel cold. I spend a good portion of my life wrapped in some sort of blanket, but are we really at a point in society and, more importantly in fashion, where we need a blanket with sleeves?

Really, some of the blame for this lies with the Amish. Ever since they limited the purchase of their patented Heat Surge Roll-N-Glow Electric Fireplace to just two per customer, people are looking for new, inexpensive ways to stay warm.

I also think the economy being in the toilet is to blame and we’re all looking for a way to return to the comfort of the womb, but I just don’t believe the Slanket/Snuggie or a $920,000,000,000 bailout is going to make that happen.

(Actually, I would probably feel a lot better if the government would just send me my share of that check.)

Then last night I received an email from Brenda at Family Revised that included this picture.

picture from curbly.com

That, my friends, is a pimped-out Snuggie/Slanket.

Yeah, like that makes it better.

Now for the questions.

1. Laura asks: “I live up the road in Austin, and as you know, it’s currently 80 degrees in January. I can’t possibly get out my springtime clothes right now, as my mother who lives 900 miles away would KNOW if I wore linen, pastels, or white before Easter. So my question is, what’s a Texas girl supposed to wear when it’s unseasonably warm in the winter?”

Laura, I would hate for your mama to have to drive 900 miles just to yank some pastel linens off your body before you brought lasting shame to your family. And you and I both know that could totally happen.

The key to seasonally-appropriate dress when the weather isn’t seasonally appropriate is to look for lightweight tops and t-shirts in fall/winter colors. Also keep in mind that layering is your friend because sometimes the mornings start out chilly and then warm up quickly.

This winter, as we all know by now, I have made much use of the scarf as an accessory. You can pair a lightweight scarf with a long-sleeve or short-sleeve t-shirt and a pair of jeans. Start off the day with a light sweater or cute coat over it and you’ve got an outfit that will take you from a low of 42 to a high of 78, which just happens to be tomorrow’s forecast.

On the bright side, at least you won’t be tempted to buy a Snuggie.

2. Amy asks: “My question to you is this…is it ok to wear jeans, a sweater, and open toed pumps?”

Yes, I believe that it is as long as you’re ready to deal with any possible frostbite issues. Just make sure that it’s more of a peep-toe shoe that shows just a hint of toe as opposed to any sort of sandal.

My advice is to stay away from full-toe nudity in the wintertime unless it’s a formal occasion.

3. Sylvia asks: “I’ve been a stay at home mom for a while (years) and my uniform consists of jeans and t-shirts. I’m going back to work three days a week and have a very limited budget. So, what do I HAVE to have, where do I get it, how can I get it as cheaply as possible and how do I wear it once I get it?”

There are a lot of issues packed into this one question, but I’m going to do my best to help you out.

The first thing I’ll say is that I wouldn’t go buy a whole bunch of stuff until you’ve worked there a few weeks and gotten a good feel for the office dress code. Once you have a better idea of what other people wear, you’ll have a better idea of what you’ll need.

A few basics that I’d suggest are a good pair of black pants. They don’t have to be expensive, but they should fit well and be comfortable. If you can afford it, you would also be well-served to get another pair of pants in either a charcoal gray color or some shade of camel. I’m not going to link to any specific pairs because I think your best bet is going to be someplace like Kohl’s or TJ Maxx and possibly Target. Just dig through the racks and try on a bunch of different pairs even if they don’t look great on the hanger. They might surprise you.

Once you have those foundation pieces then you can look for a few different tops. Since you have a limited budget, I’d suggest sticking to a simple palette of shirts that you can change up using various accessories like scarves, necklaces, or sweaters. Another great thing to have would be a nice trenchcoat and maybe a few different jackets that you can wear with various skirts and pants.

My last suggestion is to go look at the Outfits section on the Ann Taylor or Ann Taylor Loft site. You can find looks that you like and then go look for similar pieces at various discount stores.

I hope that helps!

4. Kim asks: “I’m about to have baby #2 by scheduled c-section and would like to look good in the hospital. I’m planning on getting my hair blown out and having a pedi/mani the day before. My question is what should I wear? I don’t want to be stuck in a hospital gown for those first pictures of baby and mama.”

Amen, Kim. Amen.

I cannot tell you how much I appreciate a woman who wants to look her best immediately after giving birth. Those pictures will be around for years to come and dragged out at every high school graduation and rehearsal dinner video montage and there’s no reason to suffer for eternity in a bad hospital gown.

Target has really cute gowns and pajamas these days. You might be able to find something there in a few sizes larger than you’d normally wear.

When I had Caroline, I ordered a pair of pajamas from The Cat’s Pajamas. They have really good sales in their outlet section and they are so soft. One last site you may want to check out is Sleepyheads.

And one last piece of unsolicited advice, bring your own pretty pillowcase to the hospital. It will make your pictures look that much better, plus you’ll have a little piece of home with you instead of scratchy, sterile hospital linens.

5. Amy asks: “Is it true that you shouldn’t wear black to a wedding?”

No, it’s an urban myth. I just wouldn’t wear any kind of black armband which might lead folks to believe you’re in some kind of mourning, but a little black dress is always appropriate.

6. Megan asks: “I’ve noticed a ridiculous increase in the number of Bender Ball, 8-second Abs, ‘I lost 437 pounds of belly fat in 3 weeks’, etc. commercials. Combine these commercials with the swing in the political climate and the economy in a state where most of us can only afford half a shirt anyway…Do you think that ‘the ab’ is going to make a comeback as a desirable fashion accessory?”

I don’t know about the rest of y’all, but my abs are way past making any kind of comeback.

Frankly, I’d rather wear a Snuggie or a Slanket, especially if it’s pimped out.

Okay, that’s all the questions for this week.

Like I mentioned last week, I’m adding a Mr. Linky to the bottom of this post. Please feel free to link to your very own Fashion Friday tip or fashion find. Just please make sure that you link to your specific post and not just the url for your blog. You have until Sunday to post your link and then I’ll shut it down.

Y’all have a great Friday.