Author: Big Mama

Sophie and I recorded a new podcast earlier today. We talked about computers for a brief minute before we delved into more important topics like jeans (I had the sale find of a lifetime on Friday), booties, the search for a good foundation/tinted moisturizer and, most importantly, the fact that college football starts next weekend. We mapped out a dip strategy for our respective game day watching.

You can click here to listen. Or here. You can even listen right here on the blog.

Or, as always, you can subscribe on iTunes.

Just FYI – here’s where you can get more info on the products / places we mention (these aren’t affiliate links – just regular ole links):

– Free People Denim Super Flares
– Citizens of Humanity Flip Flop Flares (not the same as what Mel got, but I can’t find the other flares online, and her bargain price is in stores only)
– KUT from the Kloth Katy boyfriend jeans – petite, regular, and plus (our store in B’ham had plenty in stock in all sizes – just FYI)
– TOMS Lace-Up Wedge Booties (not the same color as the ones at Nordstrom Rack, but still)
– Jalapeno Popper Dip
– Captain Rodney’s Dip
– Southwest Fiesta Salad
– Pioneer Woman’s Spicy Pulled Pork
– Casa Ole’ Queso

Y’all.

We’ve made it to the end of August. If you look really hard you can see the light at the endless tunnel of heat. You can also find some good summer things on clearance right now. For instance, Anthropologie is offering an additional 30% off all sale merchandise with the code EXTRA30 at checkout.

So far I haven’t seen anything for fall that I’m absolutely in love with, but it could just be that it’s too hot to think about it. Anyway, here are a few cute things this week.

1. meja pullover

Love this because it’s really pretty, yet casual and easy to throw on with jeans.

2. friday, plaid-urday, sunday tunic

I can totally picture this with leggings and tall boots. Or maybe just tall boots depending on how short it is in real life.

3. your west interest at heart boot

Speaking of boots, I love these. The color, the suede, the whole thing.

4. old navy patterned swing dress

I don’t know how long this is, but it could also be cute paired with leggings.

5. gap carryall tote

Gap doesn’t have much of anything right now, but I did see this tote which I think is really pretty. Love the tassel detail. And it also comes in navy or taupe.

6. zoe and rose print duster

Love easy things to throw on over a tank and jeans.

7. chloe k knit tunic

I really like this tunic because it’s long and it’s knit which means it’s a great thing to throw on for early morning soccer games or carpool in the fall.

8. evoda laser cut bootie

So while I’m excited about the resurgence of flare jeans, it’s also made me think about shoe options. Because I like flares with a heel and my wedge sandals will be good until it cools off and then I need a boot option. These have potential.

9. tillie plaid shirtdress

This is on sale at Anthropologie which means it’s an extra 30% off with code EXTRA30 at checkout. I think it could look great over skinny jeans or with leggings and then a denim jacket when the weather changes.

10. glimmered tee

This comes in a few different colors and is also on sale at Anthro. I love the little bit of shimmer. Makes it a little dressier than the average t-shirt but still easy to throw on to go to dinner or something.

That’s it for today.

Have a good Friday.

Apparently yesterday was National Dog Day. I had no idea this was a real thing. In fact, it seems like there is now a day for just about everything and I think it may just be an excuse for people to post a picture of their Great Aunt’s housekeeper’s daughter because it’s National Great Aunt’s Housekeeper’s Daughter Day.

But of course I took a picture of Piper and Mabel to celebrate.

I told them it was Happy National Dog Day and they seemed pretty unimpressed. I think it’s because there were no gifts involved. And you know Mabel wrote a haiku about it.

I think I was robbed
No one offered me a cake
I am deeply vexed

Okay, here are a few quick things for today:

1. Nobody’s Cuter Than You Discussion Guide

That’s right. This is a real thing. And I’m even the one who wrote the questions.

So if your book club is looking for a book to read this fall, I would be so thrilled if you happened to choose Nobody’s Cuter Than You. You can find the discussion guide on the Nobody’s Cuter Than You book page. Just click where it says Download Discussion Guide and you will find questions that can be printed out and your book club can either answer them or set your wine glasses on them. Either way.

And you can find Nobody’s Cuter Than You at Walmart, LifeWay, Barnes & Noble or on Amazon.

My only regret is that we can’t all sit down together so I can hear everyone’s answers.

2. Pioneer Woman’s Kitchen Collection

Um. Yes. This is a real thing and it will be available on September 1. I can’t tell you yet where it will be sold, but I promise to tell you as soon as I can.

In the meantime, I will say that I received some of the collection in the mail yesterday and it was like sunshine on a cloudy day except it wasn’t cloudy here so maybe it was just like sunshine on a sunshiny day.

Just look at these glasses.

And I didn’t get this piece but I will be purchasing it immediately.

3. Sophie’s chicken parmesan

After the previous night’s Pinterest dinner failure, I needed a victory. (The failure, by the way, was this chicken and chorizo dish with potatoes. I’m sure I did something wrong, but it just wasn’t great.)

Anyway, P asked, “What about that chicken thing you used to cook in a skillet with marinara and parmesan cheese?” And I’m so glad because this is so easy and so delicious. I tried to make it slightly healthier by cutting out the butter and not using as much cheese and everyone cleaned their plates. It’s a perfect weeknight meal.

4. College football season

That’s right. Less than two weeks to go until my favorite time of the year.

That’s it for today.

I wish you all a Happy Administrative Assistants Who Love the Color Yellow Day!

I fell into bed on Monday night, totally exhausted and so ready to go to sleep. Which made it extra frustrating when I laid there for two hours and found myself wide awake thinking about important things like what color books I need to display on the coffee table and if I’ll ever find a pair of running shoes I like.

Side note: This is actually a real thing right now. I desperately need a new pair of running shoes but can’t figure out what I want. I thought I found some I wanted to order the other day but Caroline told me they looked like something her first grade buddy would wear to school. But that’s the problem. All the athletic shoes range somewhere between “These are elderly, orthopedic shoes” to “My eyes! My eyes!” and I’m not sure where I fit in that spectrum.

Anyway, I finally fell asleep but woke up at 2:23 a.m. when I heard a loud crash and our house alarm started going off. That’ll wake a person up.

P jumped up to investigate and it turned out that one of my decorative plates fell off the wall and triggered the alarm. So all was well and good except I looked like this for the rest of the night.

I got Caroline off to school, but we were all a little less enthusiastic than we’d been the day before. Getting three hours of sleep and being awakened by an imaginary burglar will do that to you.

And when I picked Caroline up from school she announced that she is totally unorganized and it’s all because she needs a different binder. And different dividers. And a different calculator. And, oh yes, she left the one set of gym clothes she has until we get her new ones in her locker so she has to wear something else to school.

And I tried a new recipe for dinner that I found on Pinterest and it was less than delightful.

What I’m trying to say is we are back to true form around here.

And that I need to go crawl in bed after I check to make sure all our decorative plates are securely fastened to the wall.

That’s right.

Seventh grade. How on earth did that happen? I promise it was just two years ago when I walked her down the hall to her Kindergarten classroom and now she’s a seventh grader. And it’s so weird because seventh grade is a year I distinctly remember.

I started seventh grade in a brand new school in a brand new city. I remember walking into school that first day feeling something in the realm of overwhelming nausea and cautious excitement. I know that I wore a pale pink Izod with Jordache pleated jeans, a ribbon belt and a pair of pink Keds. And the girls at my new school didn’t wear Jordache jeans, they wore Levi 501’s and so I had to have a pair immediately.

This is me in seventh grade.

You don’t want to know how long it took me to get my hair to look like that. It took some serious effort. And, as it turns out, curling your bangs under with a curling iron isn’t a great idea.

Also, P spoke at our Community Worship Service on Sunday about how we can become complacent about the good things God has put in our lives and we need to remember to count our blessings. So middle school girls everywhere should take a moment right now to thank God in heaven that the bi-level haircut isn’t a thing during their junior high years.

Caroline woke up bright and early for her first day. And she was dressed and ready to go at least twenty minutes before we had to leave the house. This was a nice change from the way we ended last school year which looked more like a NASCAR pit crew tire change than a peaceful morning. I realize it won’t last through this Thursday, but I’ll take it for now. It helps significantly that she has Athletics first period every day so from here on out she just wears her gym clothes to school and has to pack what she’s changing into for the rest of the day. This will hopefully eliminate fourteen early morning outfit changes that result in clothes being draped over the chair in her bedroom and my need for a nerve pill.

I managed to get her to pose for a few pictures before we left and my heart kind of caught in my throat because she already looks so big this year compared to last year.

We got in the car and I prayed for her day and the school year as we drove to school. And I guess my voice cracked a little bit because she patted me on the arm and said, “Don’t worry, Mom. After you drop me off you can have a good cry and go get a Chick-Fil-A biscuit.”

Dang. She’s on to me.

But I’ll have you know I didn’t go get a Chick-Fil-A biscuit. However, I did cry. I do it every year on the first day. It’s just such a marker for the passage of time. And I think I was especially sensitive because it seems like so many of my friends have dropped a kid off at college this year. All those posts and pictures of dorm rooms and packed suitcases nearly did me in. One of my friends put up a pic of the day his college-bound son was born and captioned it “Time flies when you’re having fun” and I thought I was going to have to get in the bed.

So I had my little cry and then worked on a few things I’d been needing to get done around the house and took the girls to the dog park where Mabel was fully-psychotic. A lady there with her dog remarked, “I just love watching your dogs run! They are like poetry in motion!” which made me question what kind of poetry she reads.

I ended up meeting Gulley for an unplanned lunch and then ran a few more errands before it was time to pick Caroline up from school. I was anxious to hear how her day had gone, especially since she’d texted me that morning asking about her locker shelves and when I texted back and asked how the day was so far, she replied, “I’ll tell you later. Got to go.”

Really? That’s all I get? Got to go. She could’ve typed “good” with less effort and eased her mother’s mind.

As it turns out, she had a great day. She got in the car full of stories about her new classes and her new teachers and was thrilled with almost all of it except for the part where she has a bottom locker. But I told her some things are in our lives just to build character.

And she should be thankful her character-building doesn’t involve a bi-level haircut.

We’ve spent the weekend getting ready for the first day of school and here’s what you need to know. I have peaked for the 2015-2016 school year on August 23. The house is clean, my refrigerator is full of groceries, the school supplies are organized, the laundry is finished, Caroline’s first day of school outfit is laid out on her bed, and I cooked a roast in the oven all day so we could have a home cooked meal.

I feel it’s important to document this occasion because it’s all downhill from here. And somewhere around October 7 when Caroline has lost her third school agenda and I pack an overripe banana and a SlimFast bar in her lunchbox and I’m on my second glass of wine at 5 p.m. due to math homework and I’m calling Papa John’s to deliver dinner, I’d like to look back on this day in history, smile to myself and know that I was great once.

So let’s talk about Piper and Mabel.

Many of you have asked for an update. We ended up boarding them at the vet while we were at the beach. It wasn’t my first choice, but when you’re a canine delinquent your options are limited. They were kicked out of the first two doggy day camps we tried (presumably for trying to sneak in cigarettes and sharing them with the other dogs) and then we briefly visited a third option but I left before I even attempted to leave them there because the whole place felt too much like a maximum security prison. Ironically, this probably would have been the place that actually worked. And I do have one more place I’d like to try for future trips, but they were already booked the week we were going to be gone.

The good news is we knew they were safe at the vet and it is familiar to them. I know a lot of you suggested having someone come stay at our house, but it takes the girls a long time to warm up to people they don’t know and they can be so wild that it’s not a task for the weak. So basically we need to make a strong, new friend who can come to our house on a regular basis and feed Piper and Mabel loads of treats. Or maybe just invest in a case of doggy Valium.

I’d like to tell you how they came home from the vet after our beach trip and noticed Scout was no longer with us. A story about how they cried actual doggy tears and moped around for days. But that would be lie. If they’ve noticed he’s gone, they have shown no sign of grief. Which I knew Mabel wouldn’t, but Piper seemed to enjoy having grandpa around on the rare occasion that he wasn’t sleeping and so I was surprised she never looked for him at all.

Although Mabel did write several haikus after our vacation and her stay at the vet:

All day in this place
they want me be to be their friend
I bow to no one

Dogs on my last nerve
How long, O Lord, will I wait?
Need my house, my bed

Sister is so dumb
Making friends to get more treats
I will not be bribed

And I guess Piper got bored enough to write a poem of her own:

I like food. Food is good. Please give me more of that food. Where is my food? I’d like more food.

But since our vacation, life has gotten back to normal for the girls. They’ve enjoyed a couple of trips to the ranch with P where they were able to chase frogs and jackrabbits and swim in the tanks. And I take them to the dog park every day which has become my saving grace for getting rid of some of their energy. As soon as they hit the gate they take off running as fast as they can. Eventually, Piper slows down and just mills around and smells things like a normal dog. But Mabel never stops. She runs at full speed and never stops, constantly looking for a new dog to run and chase.

In fact, I looked at her the other day after we’d been there for awhile and her face was kind of sunken in from all the exertion and her tongue was hanging way out, but she was still frantically scanning the park to see if there was fun she was missing.

And I thought to myself that she’s the super hyper kid on the playground that starts off fun but then people want to avoid because maybe she looks a little nuts. That’s when it dawned on me.

This is Mabel at the dog park.

I wish this was an exaggeration. Frankly, it would be more accurate if I could find the clip where Mike Meyers actually pulls the jungle gym out of the ground and runs down the street dragging it behind him. On the upside, if my car ever stalls at the dog park I can give her a Snickers bar and a can of Coke and Mabel can tow me home.

I can’t imagine why she got expelled from a place where normal dogs go and manage to act like they’re not insane, but it does explain why she curls up like this about 7:00 every night and barely moves until twelve hours later.