Author: Big Mama

  • A list with a heavy emphasis on hair and skin care

    I know you were hoping I’d post a list of things today. Especially a list that’s beauty and skin care related. Or maybe you weren’t.

    But, either way, it’s what you’re getting.

    1. Oh, do I have a treat for you. In fact, I’ve been waiting all week to tell you about it.

    And now I’ve probably oversold it. But still.

    Last week I had the chance to meet a perfectly delightful girl named Reagan. She is a hairdresser in New York City (please say that like the old Pace picante commercials) and she was wearing her hair styled in a messy side bun that I coveted all day long.

    You may be wondering what any of that has to do with you.

    I’ll tell you. She has a blog called Hairdresser on Fire and she recommends products and gives hair advice and, best of all, posts video tutorials on how to style your hair in various ways. I have spent the last week attempting halo braids on anything that will stand still long enough, including Caroline’s American Girl doll.

    Seriously, I adore it .

    2. Many of you had questions after I mentioned dry-brushing my skin last week. All I know is my lymphatic system has never felt better.

    Actually, I don’t really know that I feel a difference in my lymphatic system, but my skin does seem softer and has a little bit of a glow to it. Not a weird alien glow, but a healthy glow. Just wanted to clarify.

    Anyway, here’s an article on dry-brushing if you’re interested in learning more about it.

    3. Speaking of skin care, I’ve heard a lot of talk lately about the Clarisonic electric face brush. I realize it’s a little bit pricey, but a person only has one face.

    Unless they are two-faced like a girl I remember from junior high.

    Anyone have any thoughts on the Clarisonic brush? Is it worth it?

    4. And on one last beauty-related note, I am in desperate need of new eye makeup. I kind of already knew this and then I went to dinner with Gulley and my friend, Julie, last Saturday night and we were all bemoaning the state of our various wrinkles, declining metabolism, and hormonal issues.

    I mentioned that I felt like my eyes have been looking exceptionally droopy and may have even pulled down on my eyebrows to highlight my fears of what I’m afraid my eye future may hold. Then I said I think part of the problem might be that I don’t really know how to properly apply eye makeup. That’s when Julie and Gulley both admitted they didn’t even realize I wear eye shadow.

    I think I need some eye shadow help. Any brands that y’all love or products or fancy tricks that make all the eye difference? Especially my fellow brown-eyed girls out there?

    5. I woke up yesterday morning with a scratchy throat that seems to be transitioning to sore. The good news is that I have to be at Caroline’s school tomorrow morning at 9:00 a.m. to help her entire class get dressed for their musical production.

    Which shouldn’t be stressful at all. Just the equivalent of trying to get a bunch of cats to wear pants.

    I’ll let you know how it goes.

    If I survive.

    See y’all tomorrow.

  • Dollars and sense

    Yesterday morning I dragged myself out of bed. This is becoming increasingly hard the closer we get to summer vacation because, frankly, I am over second grade. But the Texas legislature says we still have three weeks of school left even though everyone’s brain checked out sometime around Easter.

    And so I walked to the kitchen in a stupor because it was time to make the donuts. And by donuts, I mean Caroline’s lunch. Packing a lunch on a normal day is hard enough, but factor in the fact that I haven’t been to the grocery store in over a week and it was like one of those bizarre Quick Fire Challenges on Top Chef. Except this didn’t involve making a canape in thirty seconds using lobster and asparagus as much as it involved what kind of sandwich can you make using no lunch meat or cheese when your child doesn’t really care for peanut butter and jelly and the only other thing you have on hand are some questionable carrots and a triangle of Laughing Cow cheese.

    So I just did the best I could and threw in a granola bar, some cheese and crackers, four grapes, a stick of beef jerky and three Oreos in an attempt to compensate for packing such a lame lunch. Then I prayed that this wouldn’t be the day one of the other parents decided to join the class for lunch.

    It didn’t help that Caroline was in a big hurry to get to school because the school store is open on Tuesday mornings and was having a big sale and there was some item that she was “DYING TO BUY” and had “WANTED HER WHOLE ENTIRE LIFE”. We rushed through our morning routine like a pit crew at a Nascar race and the whole thing ended with me yelling, “GO, GO, GO!”.

    We just barely made it to the school store on time. Caroline took out the money she’d brought, picked out her item, paid her 75 cents and walked over to where I was waiting for her. Like you, I was dying to know what she had to have, what thing she’d wanted for her entire life.

    It was a pencil sharpener shaped like a foot.

    Well, of course.

    I know that if I didn’t have some deep foot-related phobias, I would certainly want a pencil sharpener in the shape of a foot. Because it’s super classy.

    After the foot pencil sharpener purchase, she still had money left over and I suggested she might want to buy a few raffle tickets for the PTO/Teacher raffle that’s going on this week. You can buy four tickets for a dollar and then place your tickets in various cans that represent items that teachers have donated for the raffle. There are iTunes gift cards, gift certificates to toy stores, and stuffed animals. A group of fourth grade teachers pooled their money together to offer $100 cash.

    Caroline filled out her raffle tickets and ran off to drop them in the buckets she chose. When she came back, she announced, “I put four tickets in the bucket for that stuffed pony and the other four tickets in the bucket to win the betta fish.”

    I said, “Did you see the bucket for the $100? You might want to put some tickets in that bucket tomorrow.”

    She looked at me with a look just short of a major eye roll, a look that conveyed she couldn’t believe how much I don’t know about life and said, “WHY WOULD I DO THAT? I ALREADY HAVE $100”.

    And I said, “Oh, okay”.

    Because she’d probably just blow it all on pencil sharpeners shaped like feet.

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  • A day at the spa

    I so appreciate your understanding about my need to take the day off yesterday. Well, at least nine of you understood. The rest of you may have been all TO HECK WITH THIS I’M NEVER COMING BACK TO THIS LAME BLOG AGAIN. In which case you’re not reading this anyway.

    It was such a fun weekend, but it was non-stop action and the introvert who lives inside me was all talked out. I just needed about three hours on my couch to sit and listen to the sound of nothing. That’s what I did yesterday after I dropped Caroline off at school. And then I cleaned our toilets. I bet somewhere Gwenyth Paltrow was doing the exact same thing.

    I spent most of Friday recovering from my trip to Minneapolis because apparently it is very grueling for me to sit on an airplane and read InStyle. And then Friday night we went out to dinner with some friends and their daughter, Sadie, came home with us to spend the night with Caroline.

    Naturally, the girls needed a pedicure. Second grade is rough. Sometimes a girl just needs a little downtime.

    The sleepover was big fun until sometime after midnight when all of our personalities took a turn for the worse. Specifically, mine.

    Thankfully, the girls seemed to realize I was minutes away from putting them out in the backyard for the night and went to sleep. But they were up bright and early the next morning, ready for homemade cinnamon rolls. If you consider cinnamon rolls that make a POP sound when you open the can to be homemade. And I do because those things don’t ice themselves.

    Mimi and Bops picked up Caroline to take her to watch my niece, Sarah, play soccer while I dropped off Sadie and went to a baby shower for my sweet friend, Mary Emma, who was one of our high school students once upon a time when P worked for Campus Life. But now she is all grown up and expecting her first baby. And so I spent the morning catching up with some dear friends and passing around swaddling blankets and burp cloths and baby monitors.

    The rest of the day was spent trying to not anger Caroline who was going on about six hours of sleep, which is about six less than she really needs to function as a delightful human being. When I went to pick her up from Mimi and Bops’s house, she got frustrated with me because I didn’t understand what she was trying to tell me and finally said, “I AM TRYING SO HARD NOT TO LOSE MY TEMPER RIGHT NOW”. And then I think she may have spit some pea soup out of her mouth.

    But she did hand me the sweetest thing ever late Saturday afternoon.

    In case you can’t tell, it says “A spa for mother’s day after taco grosh 1:00 pm” which translates to “A spa for mother’s day after Taco Garage at 1:00 p.m.” As for the illustrations on the invitation, I’m not entirely sure. Originally I thought maybe she was planning to serve pepperoni pizza at her spa, but in hindsight I think it was a picture of a bowl full of water and bubbles.

    After she handed me the invitation to her spa, she escorted me in her room to give me the tour.

    First, she had provided a selection of jewelry for me to choose from.

    Then she showed me the mani/pedi station.

    I thought the overturned laundry hamper as a table was a nice touch, although I wondered what she’d done with all the dirty clothes that had been in there moments earlier.

    Also, please note she’d already prepared various spa treatments in advance.

    That would be a bowl of soap snowflakes that dissolve in water, some lotion and some green crystals that I wasn’t entirely sure about until she explained she just thought she’d use the green sugar we use to decorate Christmas cookies to do that “scrubbing thing” on my hands.

    I hugged her and told her I was so excited about my big day at the spa for Mother’s Day and, honestly, I couldn’t believe the effort she’d put forth. I mean, there were a lot of dirty clothes for her to dump out of that hamper.

    So after church on Sunday morning and lunch at Taco Grosh, we headed home to begin my day at the spa. She filled all her various bowls with warm water and then dumped in the sugar cookie crystals for maximum effect.

    I was able to choose my jewelry, but the nail technician was a little bit of a color nazi and rejected my choice of nail color. She had something else in mind.

    It’s a little bit brighter and more flamboyant than my normal style. Of course it may also be a little brighter and more flamboyant than Lady Gaga’s style.

    I tried to take advantage of a teachable moment and told her, “Nail polish really works best when you wipe the excess polish off the brush and do a few light coats”. However, I’m not sure she really listened based on the way she let the polish drip from the brush onto my nails and then smeared it around while she announced, “It’s so much easier to just put a bunch on at once”.

    After my nails were finished, she moved on to my pedicure.

    It is every bit as colorful as my manicure, but with the addition of several flower stickers on each of my big toes. I’m sure to either be a hit or labeled as “a little off” at the upcoming PTO meeting.

    This is the final product. I think my nine-year-old U.S. Olympics t-shirt really adds a nice touch.

    Finally, my time at the spa was over. Largely because she wanted me to take her swimming at the neighborhood pool. I have that same problem at my local nail salon all the time.

    But before the spa day was over, she told me there would be a special Mother’s Day performance. An innovative production called THE WATER CYCLE. Complete with paper stick figures.

    I always like to blend my relaxation in with some scientific knowledge so this was perfect.

    After a brief lecture on the water table, the show quickly deteriorated into the sun attacking the clouds for reasons that are unclear. Then I was told it was my job to clean up the spa while she put on her bathing suit. And that’s why I didn’t leave her a very big tip.

    Not to mention that when I tucked her into bed Sunday night, I said, “Baby, you made my Mother’s Day so special. Thank you for everything that you did. It was the best one ever.”

    And she replied, “Well, it was more work than I thought. How about you pay me five dollars?”

    Hallmark would be so proud to know that capitalism is still alive and well on Mother’s Day.

  • I’m blaming this on Monday

    We had a weekend jam-packed with so many activities and I had the best of intentions to tell you all about it and post pictures and all that stuff.

    But then we went to the pool yesterday afternoon and it was so hot and I came home and collapsed on the couch and that was when my intentions derailed.

    So I’m giving myself the day off. And I guess I could have just not posted anything until tomorrow but my OCD won’t allow me to do that.

    I’ll see y’all tomorrow.

  • Fashion Friday: Edition what? Another giveaway? MADNESS.

    Y’all.

    I’m am, right this moment, sitting in the Minneapolis airport. I just ate a Whopper with cheese for dinner and I think my face is starting to break out from the combination of stale airport air and processed fast food. (So much for taking twenty years off my life.) Needless to say, it’s all just as glamorous as what you’re imagining it to be.

    And I’m not trying to be mysterious about why I was in Minneapolis for less than 24 hours, but I don’t think I can talk about it. I feel bad about that. But I also don’t want to not mention that I was in Minneapolis because I’ve never been in Minnesota before and it kind of feels like a milestone in my quest to someday visit all 50 states.

    I didn’t even know I had a desire to do that until I just typed it. I will visit all 50 states. Maybe. Unless I change my mind and decide I don’t really want to because I’m not really a fan of airports and airplanes. Not because I’m afraid of flying, but because I’m afraid of the stale air and the bad food.

    Okay and now I’m writing this part hours later and I’m finally home on my couch and I must go to bed. I could tell you tales of woe about lack of internet on either of my flights and how I had to stick my carry on bag in the overhead compartment in Aisle 32 when I was sitting in Aisle 14 because American Airlines is stingy with overhead bin space, but I’m going to assume you don’t want to hear about my first world problems.

    And so I will now just show you ten cute things. You will note there are no pictures this week. Why? Did you not just read the part about midnight and flights with no internet and American Airlines and that I have to go to a book fair tomorrow?

    Okay, you probably didn’t read the part about the book fair because I didn’t mention it until now.

    Oh and make sure you read all the way to #10 to find out about the giveaway.

    1. simply striped loose cardi

    Love this. Love the stripes and the fact it could be worn all year round.

    2. santa cruz top

    A friend of mine emailed me and mentioned that Sundance Catalog has some really cute things and she wasn’t lying. Not that I thought she was lying. But, still, she was TOTALLY RIGHT.

    3. draw the eye vest

    How cute is this? And it’s on sale. LOVE. Perfect with jeans or shorts or whatever.

    4. Gap city flats

    Ree at Pioneer Woman (as if I need to clarify) linked to these a few weeks ago and mentioned how comfortable they are. And I was skeptical because I don’t really think flats are that comfortable. They make my feet feel claustrophobic.

    But I went in Gap later that week and tried them on. And they are SO COMFORTABLE. And they come in several great colors. An array, even.

    5. saturn sunhat

    It’s time for me to pick my annual summer hat that will have the misfortune of being completely ruined by summer’s end. This one is in the running.

    6. maddox tunic top

    Have I featured this before? Or do I just think that because it’s a white tunic?

    7. serenite sandal

    Well, these are really cute.

    8. roberta roller rabbit classic kurta

    This would be a perfect cover up or would look darling with white jeans. Or blue jeans. Or blue jean shorts.

    Versatility is a virtue.

    9. calypso st. barth straw tote

    I haven’t had time to visit my local Target in at least four days. Thus, I haven’t seen this in person. But it looks really, really cute. Perfect for the pool.

    10. nautical stripe scarf

    And now for the GIVEAWAY. Ruche is sponsoring a great giveaway for this scarf. How cute is this?

    Put that baby on with a plain white tee (or a yellow tee or a blue tee or an orange tee) and you have got yourself a fun summer look. To enter, click on over to my Nautical Stripe Scarf giveaway page and leave a comment there to enter.

    Y’all have a happy day after Cinco de Mayo. I’m going to go collapse into my bed.

    __________________________

    Tropicana is also offering a chance to win $100 gift card. Click here to enter.

  • The irony is I plucked four gray hairs out of my head this morning

    Remember the other day when I mentioned that Gulley and I had gone shopping and inadvertently ended up in the bathing suit section?

    You probably don’t remember because why would you need to remember some meaningless detail of my life? And I totally understand. I personally wish I could forget the entire incident.

    But it is burned in my brain because it’s the moment the reality of DANG, I’M GOING TO HAVE TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT A SWIMSUIT THIS SUMMER set in.

    Anyway, none of that is really the point. The point is that the whole experience led Gulley and I to have a discussion about things we should be doing to make ourselves healthier and look better as we approach forty years old.

    And, honestly, the “look better” portion of that equation weighed much more heavily because I guarantee with 100% certainty that not one person watched the Royal Wedding and thought, “MAN, I bet Pippa Middleton has phenomenal cholesterol levels.”

    Then, last week, Oprah had Bob Greene on her show and the whole thing was about being twenty years younger. I really haven’t consistently watched Oprah in years but I’ve been sucked in by the last season because I don’t want to miss anything. I end up deleting most of them from my DVR because, contrary to popular belief (I’m looking at you, P) I don’t have much time on my hands to just lie on the couch and watch T.V. However, the Bob Greene thing totally sucked me in for almost ten minutes before I deleted it because who wouldn’t like to turn the clock back twenty years?

    Of course, for me, I could accomplish that by drinking too much Zima and dancing with no rhythm to an MC Hammer song. Which might be preferable to eating a plateful of steamed broccoli.

    Bob Greene talked about the importance of nutrition, exercise, skin care and something else that I can’t remember right now and so let’s hope it wasn’t that important. And then Oprah talked about her skin care regimen. I think she exfoliates with diamonds or something. Bottom line is I don’t believe the Oprah skin care regime is in the Big Mama budget. I bet it’s more than $15.00.

    But here’s what I’ve been doing lately.

    1. Using Aveeno Daily Brightening Face Scrub every day followed by Oil of Olay Regenerist Moisturizer.

    2. Trying to eat more vegetables and fruits even though they don’t taste like chocolate chip cookies. Also, drinking a ton of water. Sparkling water, still water, tap water. Water. I add lime because I am very fancy.

    3. Dry brushing my skin because it’s supposed to be good for your lymphatic system or something. I don’t really know, but it’s supposed to make your skin glow or eliminate toxins or something.

    4. Taking a range of vitamins and essential minerals. Those Flintstone vitamins are delish. I’m just kidding. I’ve actually been taking Evening Primrose Oil (good for hormones, skin and heart), One A Day multi-vitamin with green tea extract for boosting metabolism, Vitamin D, and Calcium supplements.

    I’m just a step away from carrying around one of the plastic day-of-the-week pill containers like my Pa-Pa used to have.

    5. Doing some form of exercise on a semi-regular basis. I haven’t been as good about this as I need to be, but I’m vowing to resume with enthusiasm on Monday.

    And so I’m wondering if any of these things really make a difference. Or is there something you do that makes a difference? Is there some fountain of youth I need to be aware of in the form of a bottle of something I can purchase?

    Or is the key to drink about four Zimas or a bottle of Boone’s Farm Strawberry Hill about once a week?