Fashion

I’m just going to be honest and let y’all know up front that my heart is not really into Fashion Friday this week. Maybe it’s because I’m tired from having a sick child who has spent the last three nights attempting to sleep inside my ribcage, or maybe it’s because I just overloaded on nostalgia yesterday.

However, in the words of Celine Dion, my heart will go on.

Of course part of the problem may be that I found out that NBC may be canceling Friday Night Lights. Seriously, NBC? You can air eight different versions of Law & Order, but have no room for Coach Taylor and the Dillon Panthers? If you cancel Friday Night Lights then you are dead to me, NBC. Dead.

And on a beauty front, I can’t leave well enough alone. I decided I needed some sideswept bangs to soften my face. I discussed my decision with Gulley at Starbucks on Wednesday morning and she said, “I don’t know why you want to do that. Every time you cut them all you do is complain until they grow out.” I listened to her words of wisdom and took them in.

Then, I went and had my hairdresser cut some sideswept bangs.

It will be forever referred to as the Valentines Day Massacre ’08.

I immediately came home and pulled them back in a bobby pin, as if that could make the horror stop. But, lo and behold, when I took the bobby pin out, they were still there.

Let’s move on to happier, shinier things.

1. Betsey asks: “I bought some really cute trouser jeans, but I’m not sure what type shirt to wear with them. It seems to me something fitted would work best. Any suggestions?”

Go with your instincts for they are right. If I had gone with my instincts I wouldn’t be sitting here with a bobby pin holding back my bangs.

Here is a great example of a trouser jean outfit from Neiman Marcus.

You don’t necessarily need to tuck anything in, but it should definitely be a top that balances out the wide legs of the jeans, although here is an example of trouser jeans with a top that’s not quite as fitted.

But keep in mind this model is probably 6’2″ and 105 pounds. She can get away with things that may not work on mere mortals.

Here are some things that would look great with trouser jeans.

Check out this. And this. And this. And this.

Plus, I love the look of a short jacket with a fitted shirt underneath. Like this.

Just remember, it’s all about creating a clean line. Trouser jeans should be your friend.

2. Carrie asks: “I’m 5’4″ and short-waisted and unfortunately VERY well-endowed up top. I’m on the low end of the
plus-size scale (a 16/18 or so), but thanks to the fact that I’m nursing, my tops that used to barely button now lack a
good 4” closing. Any inexpensive top ideas?

I looked around and found a couple of cute things that could give you some options besides the unbuttoned shirt with a tank top underneath that you mentioned in your email. But let me say, don’t underestimate the unbuttoned shirt with tank, it can be a friend of the nursing mother.

You may have better luck with things that don’t button down the front and look for some knit tops. Old Navy has some really cute options. Look at this and this and this.

Oh, and I love this sweater that you could throw on over a tank.

Just remember that a slight v-neck will be more flattering than a round neck and also, eventually your body will go back to normal. At least that’s what I hear.

3. Shayna asks: “My hubby is deployed in the Navy right now, and I just bought this dress for his ship’s homecoming in April. What color shoes should I get to go with it?? There has been much debate over it, although apparently white strappy sandals are out. HELP!!!

The rumors are true, white strappy sandals are out.

My instinct is to tell you to go with silver or pewter shoes. It’s hard to tell from the picture how dressy the dress is and since the material is jersey it could probably go either way.

If you’re looking for something more casual, then something like this might be a good option. And if you want something dressier with a heel, then check these out. Or these.

If anyone has any other suggestions, let me know. I just think that silver shoes with some pretty silver accessories would be perfect.

And, let’s be honest, by the time he gets off that ship he’s probably not going to be looking at your feet.

4. Kelly asks: ” I’m going to be wearing this dress in my best friend’s wedding less than 2 months after I give birth. I never wear strapless dresses because I need more “support” than you can generally get with a strapless dress. And I’m sure that I’ll want to try and wear something to smooth and slim my tummy area. I’m looking at getting something like this or this, but I’ve never worn anything like this before so I just wanted to see if anyone might have some suggestions for me. Thanks!

Well, bless your heart. No one should have to be a bridesmaid within two months of giving birth.

I attended a formal event five weeks after I had Caroline and I was so encased in lycra and spandex that just the memory of it makes me lose my breath. Not to mention that in all the pictures I look like a sausage about to burst out of its casing.

Out of the two choices you listed, I would go with the second one. The first one isn’t full coverage and may cause spillage and odd lines. The second one has the best chance of creating a long, lean silhouette.

However, please keep in mind that you won’t really know your postpartum measurements until you are, in fact, postpartum. Take in to account that your girls will grow to proportions not normally found outside of working dairy farms.

My point is that you don’t want to make a purchase until you are closer to the event because even if you’re back down to your normal weight, you will find that things have shifted and settled much like they do on a bumpy Trans-Atlantic flight.

Do y’all have any suggestions? If you do, shout out in the comments. It’s times like this that we need to lift a sister up, along with her two friends.

That’s all I’ve got for today. I’m going to go plug in my straightening iron and see if I can’t perform some healing on these bangs. Or at least stare at myself in the mirror and will them to grow.

Along with my eyelashes.

Y’all have a great Friday!

Remember two weeks ago during my hair retrospective how we all took a walk down memory lane and had some chuckles at the ghost of fashion past?

Ha, ha, ha. What were we thinking? Who would wear that? Why did we think that looked good?

Last week I went to Target and I saw these.

I thought Target was just trying to be funky and retro. Oh Target, you are such a kidder with your tongue in cheek nod to the 70’s.

You almost had me going there for a minute.

Then, while shopping at Nordstrom, I saw these Steve Madden shoes.

And then I saw these Nine West shoes.

Michael Kors is also a fan.

Hello. You’re not fooling me, footwear fashion designers.

Those are Yo Yo’s.

And I’m starting to think they look cute.

Help me. I’ve been brainwashed.

I’m going to be totally honest right up front and let y’all know that my legs have never been more sore in my life. In fact, I tried to limit how many times I went to the bathroom today because I knew once I sat down I’d have to somehow get up. Yet, in spite of my pain, I will press on with Fashion Friday and this very special edition for kids.

Let me start by sharing some pictures with y’all that will confirm my expertise on this matter.

I gave Caroline the choice of three outfits before Kindergarten preview. She picked this and then personally selected the black patent shoes and sunglasses to finish off the look. And that’s gum in her mouth, not a shiny, gold tooth.

This is Caroline on Sunday before she went hunting with P. I like to call this look Truck Stop Chic (chick).

Here she is on Tuesday before heading out for gymnastics. This is how we roll.

And, of course, here she is on the way to pajama day in her iron-on kitten t-shirt.

This is after we went shopping at Nordstroms today. She picked out those sunglasses all by herself. Frankly, I think it’s the best $10.00 I’ve ever spent.

Why is she posing like that? Where did that come from?

Oh yes. It must be genetic.

Clearly, I have the art of dressing a child down to a real science. Learn from me grasshopper.

And hope that your child doesn’t spot Nicole Richie’s sunglasses in Nordstroms after you’ve promised she can pick whichever pair she wants.

1. Jenny asks: “How many outfits does the AVERAGE person have for their child per season? How many pairs of shoes? I mean is 30 way overboard, or just a smidge too much?”

Thirty pairs of shoes or thirty outfits? Either way, will you adopt me? Seriously. I don’t eat that much.

That’s not really true. I can eat quite a bit, but I’m very charming and I sleep through the night.

I don’t know how many outfits Caroline has because I tend to buy most things as separates. She has several different tops and sweaters, a few pairs of jeans, and some dresses. And honestly, as she gets older and more opinionated, she prefers to just keep about four of her favorite things in constant rotation.

As for shoes, she has about five or six pairs. The only shoes I spend more money on are tennis shoes because she wears them almost everyday. All her other pairs come from Target or Payless because she outgrows them faster than a monkey can drink a bottle of tequila.

What do y’all think? What’s average?

2. Holly asks: “How can my daughter, who is 8, be stylish and fashionable without resorting to some of the current trashy trends in the girls’ department?”

Here’s the good news. I think that the trend tides are starting to head back in a more modest, less trashy direction.

Boden has some darling things for kids. Look at this cute shirt. I’d be willing to bet you could find a less expensive version of that at Target.

I love these cropped cargo pants with a fun t-shirt for spring and summer.

I’d like this dress from Lands End for myself, but it would look precious on an 8 year old.

One of my very favorite looks on little girls is a dress with cropped leggings. It’s practical, but stylish.

There are lots of appropriate things out there. Look at this. And this. And this.

I realize I don’t have an eight year old. I just have a four year old with the mind of a fifty-five year old. Even at this tender age, we obviously have our differences on what is appropriate and what is not. I am trying my best to set the precedent that I am in charge of what she wears, but I will let her express her own style as long as it’s appropriate. So even though I am no longer a fan of sparkly glittery unicorn t-shirts, I will let her wear them if that is what appeals to her delicate fashion sensibilities.

I will not, however, allow her to wear a t-shirt that says “Foxy Mama” or “Hot Stuff”. Those are just for me.

3. Babystepper asks: “My little boy grows out of his pants in the length before he even grows into them in the waist. How on earth do I find (comfortable) pants (cheaply) that he can wear that will actually fit him?”

I’ve had this same problem with Caroline. Her waist is so tiny, but she has long legs. Wow, what I wouldn’t give to have someone describe me that way.

Anyway, we’ve had a lot of success with Gap jeans with the adjustable waist. I try to wait for them to go on sale, but they are such good quality. Plus, they seem to have a narrower fit all the way through the leg, so the waist doesn’t look funny compared to the leg fullness. Old Navy has adjustable waist also, but the legs of the jeans are cut fuller and tend to look bulky.

Of course, all I’ve had experience with are the girls’ jeans, so boys could be totally different.

A commenter named Steff J. shared this advice that might help you out. “We use the pull in button ones like you described. The Levi’s work the best for us and we got them at TJ Maxx for 9.99 to 10.99 a pair. Also, there are some at Kohls but I don’t know the brand, but they were 6.99 in one of their 40% off sales.”

It sounds like you might need to head to TJ Maxx. You can’t beat 9.99 a pair.

4. Elizabeth asks: “I also have a wee one starting Kindergarten in the fall, and while I happen to think that Gymboree and big matching bows are appropriate for just about anything life might throw at her, I worry that at some point she may outgrow their wares. On the flip side, I shudder at the thought of sending her off in a faux leather animal print skirt with knee-high boots and a fuzzy faux fur jacket vest (I have seen that exact outfit at Children’s Place) – she’ll look like a miniature Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman. Where’s the fine line? How do I toe it without making her the laughingstock on the milk and cracker crowd?

Second question – at what point does a little girl outgrow the bishop dress? My sister in law and I have debated this for hours as we both have tiny ones for which they are completely adorable, and pre-Ks who seem to be getting a bit gangly for such dresses. But we are both loath to graduate the “big girls” to big girl dresses just yet. What to do?”

Okay, for your first question I am going to refer you to the answers I gave Holly in question two. I think there are some decent options out there right now and we can just hope that big sweaters and full-length skirts make a huge comeback by the time our girls are in high school.

We can also hope that they are lucky enough to be on the dance team and do a cool salute to “Deep in the Heart of Texas” like we did. (As it turns out, Elizabeth and I attended the same high school and were both Stars. It’s a bond for life.)

As for the second question, I’ve wondered the same thing. I hate to put a specific age limit because I think it depends on the child. Caroline has never owned a lot of bishop dresses because she is just so rough and tumble that they never seemed to really suit her.

As opposed to leopard print velour pants with pink cowboy boots.

However, I think there is nothing cuter than a sweet little girl in a smocked bishop. If you buy them long enough, it takes away from the gangly look. And I think as long as they’re still willing to wear them, go for it.

I ordered this dress for Caroline to wear for Easter. It’s a little less babyish, but still sweet. Although since Easter falls on March 23 she’ll probably be wearing it with her pink down jacket.

Orient Expressed also has this dress which I just love. And it comes in pink too!

I’d buy this one for myself. But I probably can’t fit in a childs size 12.

Anyway, those are some options to the smocked bishop that don’t look too grown up for a little girl.

5. Candace asks: ” My 2.5 year old daughter is going down a road where she is making interesting clothing choices. How do you make sure they keep the eclectic tastes at home and will go out wearing more traditional styles outside of the home? “

Umm. I have no idea.

Y’all have a great Friday!

Is it Friday already? I’ve been so busy scanning pictures of my former hairstyles that time has gotten away from me.

I’m also not sure if any of y’all still want to read anything I have to say about fashion after seeing the Laura Ashley sailor dress and the white hose.

Not to mention that from my junior year in high school through my junior year in college, I probably owned no fewer than fifteen Leslie Lucks dresses. There are a lot of foam shoulder pads sitting in a landfill somewhere, contributing to global warming and the melting of the polar ice caps, due to my need to wear dresses with huge bows, big collars and puffed sleeves.

But oh they looked fancy with white hose and matching shoes.

Although I do feel bad for the polar bears who are watching their ice caps melt away.

The other day Caroline and I had to attend a Kindergarten preview, which is so weird because she was only born three months ago and there’s no way she is starting Kindergarten in the fall.

Anyway, I decided to follow the advice I received from some of the lovely internet people (that’s y’all) and started laying outfits on her bed that she could choose from in hopes of eliminating Wardrobe Crisis ’08.

I put two outfits on her bed while she watched me and then I went back into her closet while I said, “Okay, I’ll give you one more to choose from…”

She interrupted and said, “Well, I hope it’s better than either one of these.”

I think maybe she was hoping for a Leslie Lucks dress.

Now for the questions.

1. Erin asks: “I just found out that I am pregnant for the 4th time!!! This is good news, but the downside is that ever since my second pregnancy I have struggled with varicose veins – while I am pregnant. I have worn support hose throughout my last two pregnancies for comfort – the ability to stand and hold and take care of my other children, etc. So, Big Mama, what do I wear this summer? How can I hide these awful hose while everyone else is wearing sandals and flip flops??? And, what can I wear to church and on dates with my husband?

Oh sweet Erin. Is there a possibility that you could join the polar bears on the melting ice caps for the summer? Because otherwise I am not sure how you are going to survive the heat while wearing support hose all summer.

Air-conditioning. Lots of air-conditioning.

Since I have an August baby, I do understand the summer pregnancy. I spent a lot of mine doing my best imitation of a beached whale in a maternity swimsuit. Which doesn’t really work if you’re wearing support hose.

I don’t know how orthopedic your hose need to be, but my first thought is to suggest footless maternity hose by Spanx. They could give you the support you need, but still allow you to wear capri pants, skirts, and, most importantly, flip-flops.

If you need more support than the Spanx can offer, I wonder if you could make your own version of footless tights with a pair of scissors?

The good news is maternity wear has never been better. I’d get yourself a pair of denim capris like these with some cute shirts like this. Finish it off with some cute sandals and great jewelry.

Oh, and how much do I love this maternity wrap dress from Target? It would be perfect for date night or church.

I hope that helps, Erin. If anyone has some better advice or personal maternity support hose testimony they’d like to share, please leave it in the comments.

Because you know, when a girl is pregnant she needs all the support she can get, fashion or otherwise.

2. Holly asks: “I have a problem that I hope you’ll address at some point on a Fashion Friday. This is something that has frustrated me for years… I can’t seem to find underwear that I like the fit or feel of. Th*ngs are not even a consideration. I don’t want to resort to “granny panties”, so what is out there that is comfortable yet stylish and a little sexy? What do you recommend?”

Well, I realize I have just shown the entire internet some horrific pictures from my high school years, but some things are sacred including what kind of underwear I prefer. Plus, like choosing the right breakfast cereal, it’s all about personal preference.

I would recommend that you buy a pair of a few different brands until you find something you like. I know I have had times where I’ll buy five pairs of something, then realize later they are unbearably uncomfortable and it’s not like you can return them.

Thank goodness.

Maybe check out Target, Victoria’s Secret and a local department store to find a few options that appeal to you. Also, don’t ever underestimate the power of body-shaping undergarments to wear under certain outfits. They are often a good option that not only will make you look slimmer, but eliminate those unsightly pantylines without having to resort to a th*ng.

By the way, I just checked out the Victoria’s Secret site and they are having a panty clearance. Which just sounds wrong.

3. Barbara asks: “I like really feminine, floral, flowing things, but as I am getting…older….I am concerned that some of those things will look little girlish or look like I am trying to make myself look younger. Do you have any thoughts for those of us in the middle of middle age?”

I think just the fact you’re aware some things may not work as you get a little older means you aren’t going to make a huge fashion faux pas. If you like feminine, flowy things then I think there is no reason why you should stop wearing things like that. The good news is flowy tops and tunics are really in style right now.

Be careful to choose skirts that are not too short, but at the same time you don’t want to wear a dress or skirt that’s too long. For a modern look, choose things that hit right at or slightly above the knee. Don’t wear things that are too tight, but be careful not to wear things too loose or it won’t do your figure any favors.

Remember, too much of any print isn’t a good thing. Limit the pattern to just a shirt or just a skirt instead of an entire coordinating, matchy-matchy look. And if you’re wearing a flowy top, balance it out with some simple pants or jeans.

I love this feminine tunic and it would look great with either pants or jeans.

The most important thing is to wear what you love and what makes you feel attractive. It doesn’t matter if it’s the height of fashion if you don’t feel comfortable in it.

4. Kathryn asks: “Here is a question for your readers, at what age is long hair no longer appropriate? How long is too long? I just turned 37 and still get carded more than 50% of the time.”

Let’s talk about what’s really important here. What kind of moisturizer do you use and where can I get some?

Seriously.

I think if long hair looks good on you then you can wear it long indefinitely. I think the days of getting your hair all chopped off at forty and getting it set by your hairdresser once a week have gone the way of our grandmothers. My advice is to re-evaluate every year and see if your current style is still flattering.

And if we’ve learned nothing else from this past week, don’t be afraid of change. If not for change, I’d still be carrying a teasing comb and a can of Aquanet everywhere I go.

If y’all have any thoughts on the long hair issue, I’d love for you to share with the group.

5. This isn’t a question, but I have to share. Groovyoldlady sent me this link.

And here I thought a man wearing a sweater vest was as bad as it gets.

Of course, I’m not sure it’s really any worse than some of the Leslie Lucks dresses I once owned.

Y’all have a good Friday.

Next week’s Fashion Friday is going to be a special edition about kid’s clothes. If you have any questions, send me an email.

Oooh, it’s like Friday the 13th. Although I have never actually seen any of the 142 installments of the Friday the 13th franchise because I am a big chicken. And while I realize I probably don’t need to fear a psycho in a hockey mask, it’s just better that I stay away. The one time I watched a horror movie I ended up sleeping with my mama for two weeks.

I was eighteen years old.

And I left for college after those two weeks, which was the only reason I stopped sleeping in her bed.

I am woman. Hear me roar.

Anyway, just to keep y’all in the hair loop, I have an appointment to get my hair cut at 1:00 today. I have no idea how brave I am going to be, but after deep introspection I have realized that I have hair issues. In fact, I have decided to share those issues with y’all starting Monday when I will present a Retrospective on My Hair. I believe it will be at least a two day series.

I’m not kidding.

I am seriously going to root deep into my hair issues and share them with y’all in both word and pictorial form. I realize knowing this bit of extreme narcissism is on the horizon will make it difficult for any of y’all to sleep this weekend.

Also, I forgot to mention that when Caroline saw my new red bargain-priced shoes, she gasped and exclaimed, “OH, THOSE ARE CHA-CHA!” I believe she was channeling Dolly Parton as Truvy in “Steel Magnolias”. She does make me proud.

Now for the questions, they are plentiful.

1. Kelli W. asks: “I am a lanky 5 feet 1 inches. And that’s pushing it a little. I have to look for pants in the petites, which in some stores means old lady elastic wiasts, etc. There is a store I love, with affordable but stylish jeans. They fit me great everywhere except, of course, in the legs because they are not petite. Should I hem them and, if so, will they look good?”

Kelli, somehow this question from long ago got lost in my Fashion Folder (a very official document if there ever was one). I apologize for the delay. Anyway, the answer is yes. Hem those jeans.

The trick is to find a tailor who will understand that you want the original hem to remain, otherwise the hem may not go with the rest of the jeans and have a weird look to it. I know that my tailor charges $10 more to use the original hem, but it’s worth it, especially if they have a little distressing on the hem.

2. Darlene asks: “I am going to be going on a Caribbean cruise at the end of February and I need to know if I should take things that are in fall/winter colors, or is it safe to take thing that say “Spring is just around the corner!”? Personally, I like the darker colors over the bright ones, but either way, I don’t want to stick out like a sore thumb. Do I dare pack my white capris?”

First, please take me with you. You’ll hardly notice I’m there and frankly, I could use the vacation. Don’t let the fact that you don’t know me and that I may overindulge in the all-you-can-eat cocktail shrimp buffet influence your decision.

Secondly, yes. Pack the white capris but by all means make sure you pack the appropriate undergarments. Pantylines are never acceptable, even on the Caribbean sea.

A cruise this time of year is the reason so many retailers come out with what they like to refer to as Resort Wear. It’s basically their way of saying “Hey, we would like you to buy summer clothes in February!” And as long as you use terms like “Resort” and “Cruise” it’s completely acceptable. For an example, check out Neiman Marcus’ Resort Essentials.

And yes, if you shop at Neimans on a regular basis then you probably need a large collection of Resort Wear. However, you can also find cute spring things at Target right now although they’re just called “Cute Spring Clothes”, which doesn’t sound nearly as fancy.

3. Alicia asks: “Help. I bought some Mossimo jeans with flap pockets in the back. Ever since washing them the first time, the flaps on the pockets won’t lay flat! I’ve laid the iron on them for several minutes, but it doesn’t help. Short of sewing them with a needle and thread, I’m at a loss.”

I don’t know if I can help but I will make two suggestions. If y’all have any thoughts on how to redeem these prodigal pockets, leave them in the comments.

I would try to spray them with water and/or spray starch and then iron them flat. However, you may have already attempted this.

If that doesn’t work I think they may have to go to the drycleaners. Or the trash bin. No one needs obstinate pocketage on their rear silhouette. It’s just wrong.

4. Rhonda asks: “I have a kitchen question of the utmost importance for you…i’m wondering if you’ve any suggestions or seen any stylish/cute receptacles to keep dish soap out on the kitchen counter? i’m sick of the plastic bottle that it comes in, but i’m holding out for “the one”!”

I realize this isn’t a fashion question per se, but I am not going to discriminate. After all, what’s the point in owning a fabulous pair of jeans if you’re standing at your sink with a plastic bottle of Dawn Dishwashing Liquid? That’s just tacky.

Anyway, this isn’t the most original idea but I saw it years ago in a magazine and loved it. You need to buy yourself a liquor pourer, which you can find here.

After you have secured a liquor pourer (oh how I want to make some obvious joke about a bartender) then go to an antique shop or someplace like Target and find a pretty glass bottle. Pour in your Dawn, twist on the liquor pourer and there you have it. A pretty, functional dish soap dispenser.

Plus, if you’re having a particularly bad day you can pop that pourer on a bottle of something else, like Diet Coke with Lime.

5. Christina didn’t ask. She suggested: “Maybe you can create a “What the celebrities should have worn to the Golden Globes if there had been Golden Globes” post.”

I thought long and hard about dedicating an entire post to what I believe stars should have worn to the Golden Globes if it were not for the Writer’s Strike that is currently ruining my life. The problem is I don’t really have access to seeing fabulous couture gowns that the celebs get to choose from because life is not fair.

However, if I were to attend an event such as the Golden Globes or anything dressier than say, going to HEB to buy milk, I would love to wear one of these gowns.

This lovely, bargain-priced Valentino. Although I would probably like it better in black.

And this beautiful Vera Wang, even though I’m not sure that yellow would flatter my skintone. But still, it is gorgeous.

Anyway, it would have been fun to compose an entire post about Golden Globe wardrobe possibilities, but I made an executive decision and instead y’all will be treated to endless ramblings about my hair issues both past and present.

I know.

You can hardly wait.

Have a great Friday.