Month: July 2006

  • Best Friends

    A couple of hours ago we were leaving to go to Walmart. I made Caroline make one last trip to the potty to help us stay accident free. After she went I said “Good for you, you did it! I’m so proud.” She hugged me so tight and said “Mama, we are best friends!”

    I realize that as her mother she won’t always see me as her best friend and really being a good mother means that at times she will really not like me. I will cherish it while it lasts and remember it when she’s 14 and has no desire for me to be her best friend.

  • Invasion of the Bees

    P. and I took Caroline to the neighborhood pool on Saturday only to discover that the grill was closed due to an overabundance of bees. One lifeguard was quick to tell us that she even got
    “stung on the spine”. I have to agree with P. when he said that unless bees are now burrowing into our skin, she really just got stung on her back. I don’t mean to sound unsympathetic, but no one on staff at the pool seems that concerned about the grill being closed, while I, as the mother of a toddler, view the grill as crucial to our pool enjoyment experience.

    I met Gulley and her crew there today and yes, grill still closed. They now have it roped off with caution tape so it looks like maybe someone met a grisly end at the pool. The only fatalities I saw however, were bees floating in large jars of something that apparently is bad for bees.

    No one is saying when the grill will reopen but in the meantime you can still purchase popsicles, drinks and slices of Double Dave’s pizza (for $2.00 per slice). So we left this evening after having an ice cream sandwich, but no dinner for Caroline which there again (and I can’t overstate this) is crucial to the pool experience.

    So you might think I am a little overly obsessed with the pool food. Let me say that the food is completely mediocre for the most part. As P. says “what do I expect from food cooked by 14 year olds?” I have eaten a few meals there and it really all tastes the same, which is quite the accomplishment considering what a varied menu they offer.

    For me the grill isn’t about the quality nourishment, but the ability to go to the pool, swim our hearts out and eat dinner all in one glorious stop. Granted (and as Gulley can attest) I spend most of our dining experience saying “Caroline, THIS IS YOUR DINNER, YOU NEED TO EAT, or you will get NOTHING ELSE when we get home”, to which she usually runs off to play with Jackson some more. The point is that by the time we get home and are at the point of sheer exhaustion, dinner is already out of the way and we can move on the bathtime and pajamas.

    I realize that the bees got out of control, but have mercy call an exterminator, a bee keeper, anyone so that the proper order of things can be restored at the pool. I would kill for a soggy grilled cheese sandwich, which maybe explains the caution tape.

  • My wish for you

    After having a child free evening last night and getting to sleep in a little this morning, I am now paying for it because Caroline will not nap. I thought she had fallen asleep until I heard every book from her bookshelves being thrown on the floor. I went in to find books everywhere and she had torn another piece of her Wizard of Oz book. I said “Caroline, do not tear up your books.” I guess my tone of voice combined with that fact that she is truly exhausted caused her to burst into tears. After awhile she settled down as I rocked her and agreed to let her “rest” on the couch (which isn’t going to happen, but at least I know she’ll go to bed early tonight). She pulled back, smiled at me and said “look mama, I see myself in your eyes”. Maybe it’s because I’m a little extra emotional today but it made me all teary. I hope she can always see herself in my eyes because then I’ll know that she will always know how sweet, how charming, how precious she really is. Even more, I hope that I can teach her to see herself through God’s eyes because that will make her unstoppable.

  • You want me?

    Caroline had a bad dream the other night and woke up calling for me. I went into her room to rock her until she settled down. As I was rocking her I thought how amazing it is that my presence can calm all her fears. She immediately felt safe and protected. The irony is that I am a girl who slept in my mom’s room for two weeks before I left for college because I saw Pet Semetary. No one would accuse me of being brave. To this day if scary movie previews come on, P. will say “Don’t look, don’t look” because he knows that whatever I see will be permanently imbedded in my brain and cause a bout of insomnia.

    My childhood nighttime adventures are legendary so she comes by it honestly. I am famous for yelling “But Mama, I can’t see” to which my mother would reply “You’re not supposed to see…it’s nighttime go to sleep”.

    A few months ago she was waking up all hours of the night and one night I finally said “Caroline, this is ridiculous, I’m not coming in here again.” In my defense I was very tired and sleep deprived after 2 weeks of mediocre sleep and I am a girl who loves my sleep. She went to school the next day and told her teacher “mama says IT’S DICULOUS and she’s never coming in my room again.” Nice. That right there will win me some major parenting awards.

  • I wanted to go to the pool….

    Caroline didn’t take a nap today so instead of the usual long day I had the excruciating long day. That’s the one that comes complete with whiny, tired toddler who feels like the whole world is out to get her because she can’t have a third popsicle. Lovely.

    I finally got her ready for bed and was tucking her in. She went through her usual “I need a drink of water, sing another song, rock me”…and when those possibilities were finally exhausted she yelled “But I wanted to GO TO THE POOL TODAY!!” Sorry. No pool today. No one said it’s easy being almost 3.

    Earlier today (during the no napping) we were on the computer playing games on Noggin. I think it was Pinky Dinky Doo and the big word game. The word we got was apprehensive. Caroline repeated it and asked “what that mean Mama?” I told her it’s when you’re worried about something. She said “I apprehensive about having bad dreams.” It was so sweet and very impressive for a child with 50% DNA that considers the Cabelas catalog to be a fine piece of literature.

  • Looking Ahead

    Ever since I became a mother (and probably even before then) I have tried to picture myself at various stages of life. I wonder what I’ll be like, if I’ll feel the same way I do now and if everything I’m doing as a mother will be the best thing for my doodle. I look back on all the mistakes I made as a teenager and I want better for her. She is so strongwilled and I am constantly worrying if I am disciplining her in the right way for the right things.

    We had a major showdown last night. I realized she has slowly been gaining control of things by dawdling, trying to manipulate, etc. I had enough and put my foot down. Yesterday was a new beginning of making sure she knows the Mama and Daddy are the boss. We are benevolent, but she has to listen to us. As I was rocking her last night she said “I love you Mama” and I said “I love you too”. She said “then you shouldn’t tell me no”. How does she know to do that? I told her that I tell her no because I love her and my goal is to help her be a better person. I’m not sure she comprehends any of that but it’s true and hopefully it will sink in at some point.

    As a wise woman once told me “if they get to be thirteen and don’t know you’re in control…you’re sunk”. I pray that God will give me the wisdom to guide her in the way that’s best for her. She may not like me, but I know she’ll always love me.